Traditional top table layout?

I know that is increasingly popular for the bride and groom to sit alone on what I think they call a sweetheart table and then the other members of the traditional top table acts as the hosts for the remaining tables. I'm sure someone who knows a little more will fill you in.....

In this day and age, I think it's perfectly acceptable to use whatever layout suits you best. You can even split the tope table entirely so that the in laws are hosting their own table instead. As already mentioned, it's increasingly popular for the bride and groom to have their own table, parents can then host their own tables etc

If you want to stick with a traditional top table, put your in laws on your husbands side, and your parents on your side. If you 're having a circular table, maybe you can put the best man or bridesmaid in between the sets of parents to stop any issues arising.

At the end of the day, it's about you and your husband and not them! I'd do whatever makes you and him happy and not worry about protocol too much.

Were having my H2B's folks together, along with my 3 bridemaids, then me & OH, then our 3 groomsmen and my parents.

My OH parents are recently split up but the parenst remaining with their own partners is the tradition in my family - we do not mix families at the guest tables etc. And my mum & dad want to sit together and my OH mum is aware of this - his dad will not care either way, our wedding isnt even on his radar.

I never quite understand all this 'warring families/relatives stress at weddings' lark and how you can't put X and Y on the same table, and A hasn't spoken to B since that awful christmas present in 1975 and suchlike.

If people can't put their differences aside and can't be civil to each other for one special day - then frankly I'd bash their heads together and tell them to grow up.

Nobody has to like each other - they just have to tolerate each other for a few hours, let's face it it's only a couple of hours at the wedding breakfast on the top table, then you can split people up for the evening do and have people hosting tables as was already mentioned.

Both AJ and Millie make excellent points, and they are both right in their own ways.

In the end I think you just need to go with your heart.

We are having a "top table" but not a long one, we are having a round table of 8 in the middle of the room.

Both me and H2B have step parents on both sides and fortunately for us they all get on well enough to sit together for one meal.

We are having me and H2B, my mum and dad, his mum and dad, the bestman and the chief bridesmaid on our table. We will position the tables around us so that their other halves are sitting nearby and don't feel too cut-off.

I think it is such a shame when families argue, life really is just too short. But for the sake of one day, I would need to find a balance between telling them to suck it up and seating them somewhere not too contraversial!

My parents are both divorced (one remarried one, in a new relationship), and we've both spoken to them to make sure that they have no problems sitting together for one day, they are fully aware that they will have to be in photos together without their respective partners, and as its almost 20 years since they divorced anyway they're well past any of the animosity that caused it to happen in the first place.

We're trying to make "all four" of my parents feel equalled, so my mum's new partner will get the "mens bridal party tie" to wear, and my stepmum will get a 'mother of the groom' gift (of sorts) too, so they don't feel left out.

I'm also offering all four of them the opportunity to say a brief word if they would like to as part of the speeches, either individually or as a couple, just as a sort of word of thanks and welcome to the family stuff - that isn't covered in the normal father of the bride/groom/best man speeches.

We are only having my parents (still together) and my h2b mum and step dad on our top table. His dad and step mum are coming but will be hosting a table of their family. I was of the same opinion that they should be able to get on for one day and if they so much as looked at each other the wrong way I would chuck them out personally! However, my h2b decided against having his dad and step mum on the top table as they have only been in contact for the past 18 months and he doesn't feel like his dad has 'done enough to deserve it' as he so nicely put it. Plus I don't think he wants his mum and step dad to feel uncomfortable and they are the people that matter most to him as they are the people that brought him up. I think he has made the right choice for our day.......doesn't mean his dad likes it though!

We're having a top table but small one

Me and OH, then his mum and Best Man and my mum and dad.

My BMs will be on two different tables with friends and family as there were too many to include them all on one table

I quite like the idea of a sweethearts table - apart from at the end of the night, when else is there time to be together just the 2 of you? But I'm worried it might look rude since we only see our families once or twice a year and immediate family have come from abroad.

What about maybe having a top table but have your parents next to you and the grooms parents next him. I went to a wedding like this last year. x

Due to both of our parents being split and only one (my mom) having a new partner it kind of makes it a bit odd, so we have decided to have a top table with OH and myself and just our parents, so there is only 6 but its the way we wanted it and thats all that matters. You do whatever makes you happy and are comfortable with.

We are having a top table but with no parents.

On ours there will OH, me, bestman, my 2 boys and the bridesmaids.

You can have whoever you like Hun, , ,

And it looks sooo cute too! Someone posted this pic the other day and I nearly changed my mind on my layout....

AJ I completely understand your comments, however in some families it just isn't possible! I am dreading how my OH's Dad is going to be with his mum at our wedding. They have been divorced 34 years now (they should never have got married in the first place) & I believe the hatred between them has merely grown more with each year since the divorce. We're going to have them at opposite ends of the top table & we are going to have a couple of 'ushers' who's only role will be keeping them both under control. We will also be having strict words with them both making sure they both know that if they don't behave then they will be shoved in a taxi & sent on their merry way. Sometimes people just cannot get on & no matter how hard you try to get them to be civil all you do is create more tension. I feel like I'm marrying into a family off Shameless!!

If I was in that situation I'd have had words with both of them and say if they can't be civil to each other for one day then I don't want them to attend. It's not a case of "some people just cannot get on", it's all about self-control and restraint, and whilst I'm sure we all have people we really despise, could put on a happy face for a few hours if necessary.

After all, it's only really during the photos and wedding breakfast that they need to be closer, for the evening they can go sit at opposite ends of the room if they want to.