Tuxedo / evening suit advice please :)

Hi, we're doing the same thing, but OH owns his own tuxedo he wears for formal work events, so will wear that with a new shirt, tie, and cufflinks. The best men, bridesman, and usher will be renting, though, and as far as I know they're looking at Moss Bros, which is pretty standard I think.

We are buying suits from Matalan and they work out cheaper than hiring them.

I know they also do tuxedos so may be worth a look.

Thanks for your reply! ! !

It's really nice to hear that someone else is going for a Tux too at their wedding

My OH went to MOSS today as there was a Tuxedo he really liked there and I've just found out hes bought it

Only downside is that the best men really liked the high spec tuxedos too at Moss - they wanted us to buy their tuxedos but £200 each its a bit dear, and unfortunately those tuxedos werent part of the hire range so the search continues lol.

We're also asking all our daytime guests to wear tuxes if possible (most men have a pair of black shoes, trousers and a white shirt in their wardrobe, so we thought it wouldnt be too much trouble)

Are you doing the same or keeping it within your groom, best man and ushers etc?

Are you expecting all your guests to hire/buy dinner suits too? That's...unusual.

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Thats a good idea, we'll have a look! Thank you

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Yes its 'unusual', no-one gets to go to a black tie event very often so why not??

I guess not everyone can afford it, if they don't own one.

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Its a very true point about affordability, some people may not have a suit or able to afford one.

We made our guests aware a few months ago that we are going for a tuxedo look. Fortunatley they're all happy with the idea, nearly everyone has one at home, and only 2/3 people need pick up a jacket (we'll reccomend Matalan as someone suggested on here).

Our wedding is 'black tie optional', and I know most of the men on my side own tuxedos and would like the opportunity to wear them. The 'optional' bit lets other guests know that there will be people wearing black tie, so at the minimum a suit and tie should be worn. It also lets women know they can wear a long gown if they wish to, though with the wedding in June I doubt many will.

Tesco sell Tuxedos online, and if you buy before the 14th April, then you can get £10 any £40+ shop by putting in the code FFTREAT. Plus you can get free delivery into store. I've just ordered all our suits - splitting the buys into £40 - I saved £50 in the end

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I'm very impressed!! That's a really good idea

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Warning: rant incoming...

Well, first of all a wedding is not usually a "black tie event" in the UK. Black tie, along with white tie, is traditionally eveningwear; the corresponding correct dress for the daytime is a lounge suit or a morning suit respectively (this is why the characters in Downton Abbey spend half their lives getting changed!) As weddings are predominantly daytime events, daytime formalwear is the correct attire for them. Black tie is not "more formal" than a lounge suit, even if fewer people own them, it is just eveningwear. So having a daytime black tie event is just...not right.

Secondly, wearing a dinner jacket and bow tie with normal black trousers and white shirt is not really black tie. A dinner suit should include specific dress trousers that match the jacket and a special shirt to go with a bow tie. Fortunately most hire packages will be jacket and trousers together, but you can't just buy a dinner jacket to go with any old suit trousers!

Finally, personally I think it's quite a big ask for your guests to spend extra money on hiring a dinner suit as well as all the usual expenses of attending a wedding. My H is obsessed with dress-code protocol, to the extent that he and the bridal party all changed into dinner suits at 6pm, but they all owned them beforehand so no extra expense. He didn't ask the normal guests to do the same.

Of course, most of this except the last point is just based on old-fashioned traditions, so if you want to ignore it that's up to you. Just explaining why I think it's unusual.

I agree with Helenia, this is a dress code to far for me - tuxedoes look a bit odd during the day. I wonder, given that you say 2/3 of the guests will have to buy a jacket, whether you'll quite achieve the look you're aiming for. Wouldn't a decent suit be better than a mismatched black trousers/jacket (which is not a tux)?

Every wedding is unique, personal and meaningful to the couple who are getting married

I use 'Hitched' like all the excited girls who are getting married, looking for ideas and support on our future weddings.

If your wedding is late in the day, particularly if it's winter, black tie could work very well but I agree it's a bit unusual for a mainly day time event.

But it is entirely up to you, and you will be the best judge of whether your guests will be all for it or a little but peeved.

I went to a summer black tie wedding a few years ago. They chose black tie to ensure all the groom's mates smartened up!

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This was kinda my train of thought.

I can't help but imagine it would look more like 'fancy-dress' than fancy dress...

I would turn up in a shell suit to fly in the face of your tuxedo politics.

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So nobody should say anything if they think from their experience that something might not work well, or might inconvenience their guests?

We are having black tie dress code too! Love it! ❤️ Some people hate black in general at weddings but I personally loves it!

Totally agree with Helenia about timings (but that is where my agreement stops?) We are getting married late afternoon and having 'dinner' followed by evening reception so it is time appropriate for us.

My friends think of me like Miranda Priestley (The Devils Wears Prada) so would not dare to turn up non compliant (and that does not include some polyester number if they wish to be in my photos ?)

My friendship is worth the expense ?

From gq.com:

Hitched is supportive, but it doesn't mean people will just agree with everything you say or suggest. It's not the kind of forum where you'll get told everything is great regardless of whether it is or not.

I don't like dress codes. I think you spend enough attending a wedding (travel, hotel, gift etc), without having to spend extra on an outfit/suit too. If I want to then that's different, it's my choice.

How very American.

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I'm assuming that last bit is a joke on the part of GQ?

I've never actually seen a person in a morning suit, and I had hoped Ant would want to wear one, but seeing as he had no choice in my outfit, I'm not telling him what he can or can't wear. So, if he wants to wear a tux to our 2:30pm wedding, that's up to him.

Funky, what will you do to a guest who doesn't comply? Say, for example, I was a guest and I turned up sans fascinator? ?

OP, I'm all for black tie, but I think you should be lenient with guests. Yes, you can tell them it's a black tie event (or 'black tie optional'!), but I doubt you'll notice or care if some turn up in suits instead of dinner jackets. As far as I'm concerned, by telling our guests it's black tie just ensures they don't turn up in chinos.

I gather there will be a bucket of fascinators, from which you may help yourself. You'd better, or Funky will be forcibly jamming them on as you cross the threshold

I was so happy on our wedding day and delighted to see my friends and family. I couldn't tell you what any of them were wearing. As far as I recall they all made a splendid effort and none of them "let me down" (if that was the way I felt, which it wasn't)

I would hate to be invited to a wedding where a particular dress code (or colour scheme) was imposed on me. It suggests I am unable to make a reasonable decision as to what outfit is appropriate. And I'm afraid I am another one who knows that black tie as daywear is simply not the done thing.

It just feels a step too far for me, but good luck with your wedding.

PS what will you do if someone (horror!) turns up in BROWN SHOES???????????

I think fascinators look ridiculous.

I smile through gritted teeth, look you up and down, give a nod to my best girl who will escort you to the concierge who can book you a taxi to take you shopping to pick one up!.......? that or I'm too busy getting married to care.

Debrett's advice on what "black tie" consists of...

Black wool dinner jacket. Single-breasted with no vents, silk peaked lapels (or a shawl collar) and covered buttons. Black trousers - slightly tapered - with a single row of braid down each outside leg. White marcella evening shirt with a soft turndown collar, worn with cufflinks and studs. Black bow tie must be hand tied; avoid novelty ties or colours. Highly polished or patent black lace-up shoes. Black silk socks, long enough to ensure that no leg will show between the trouser leg and sock when seated. A white silk scarf is an optional but traditional accessory. Cummerbunds or low cut black evening waistcoats are rarely worn nowadays.

Hmm I'd like my OH to wear his tuxedo to the wedding, he decided that it was odd but couldn't articulate why. Now I know!

I'm definitely not going to impose a dress code on people. I understand the rules on Tux's, and it is probably not 100% accurate attire for what were doing.

At the end of the day, we like the idea as its a good way of getting the lads to dress smart and feel more part of the day, even if they're not part of the groomsmen.

I'm not a snob or a bridezilla, if someone turned up in a mankini, whatever makes you happy.lol .

Its just an idea that has drove us away from the traditional Morning suit.

Debrett's advice is a great description for a traditional Tux, but there are plenty of variations on them (i'm assuming tuxs and dinner suits are the same thing?)

What some people class as constructive is entirely upto them, but i think it can come accross as confrontational/bitchy sometimes.

Thanks

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It can be difficult to interpret tone of voice in print, but I don't think anyone here is being confrontational or bitchy - neither are very pleasant accusations. It's a discussion forum and everyone is giving their ideas as to how they might feel if presented with a powerful dress code invitation. Hitched ladies (and gent) will give it to you straight - and you aren't the only one with such a dress code, so please don't take umbrage.

When you've been here a while longer you'll see the huge range of opinion and ideas and that is what makes Hitched such a lively and interesting place to be.

Fair point, I have only been on here a month. I am still a newbie and getting the hang of it.

In print i agree comments can be read differently, but i'll take it with a pinch of salt.