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Curious January 2023 West Midlands

Was your wedding local or not

Rahman, 21 September, 2021 at 19:09 Posted on Etiquette and Advice 0 14
I’ve fallen in love with a venue that’s up to 1 hr and 30 mins away for some guests on the list and everyone’s making a fuss about the distance but I don’t get the big deal? Its my dream venue and if it’s for a wedding that you’d have a year notice surely people would make arrangements to come and if they can’t then they can’t. My fiancé is on the fence about it.
What do you think?

14 replies

Latest activity by ForeverFloralsEventStyling, 9 October, 2021 at 13:55
  • H
    Beginner August 2022
    HappyRedFlowers2937 ·
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    I don’t think 1h 30m journey is bad for a wedding. Our venue is 1h away from where me and OH live. It’s 3h from FH’s family, including for his grandparents, and across an ocean from my family. It’s your wedding and you should choose where you want to have it! Just know there may be people who don’t attend if they can’t/don’t want to travel.
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  • Charlotte
    VIP April 2022 Wiltshire
    Charlotte ·
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    Our Ceremony is 1h 15m away and like you it is our dream location and was never going to be negotiable. Our reception is then an hour back closer to home. it is not that far really, none of our guests have complained (well not to our face!) our Reception venue has accommodation for those that want it but we purposely went for a reception venue close to home so people can get taxi's home and not leave early to get back home. It is your day and you should go for what you want, as you say people have plenty of time to organise themselves and if they want to get hotels the night before or wedding night if they would prefer not to travel, You just need to be ok with the fact some people may decline or leave early, so if the ones making a fuss are people you really want to attend weigh it up. Maybe speak to them and explain it is your dream venue and you really want it and for them to be there and ask what their concern is. Be mindful of ceremony time, maybe go for 1 or 2pm to allow people time to get there comfortably and not be too rushed in the morning (this goes for you getting ready as well). Maybe research hotels nearby and see if you can get a block discount rate and share that with your guests

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  • Jade
    Curious June 2023 Shropshire
    Jade ·
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    No I don’t think 1 hour 30 minutes is too far at all! My dream venue is like 2 hours 30 minutes from me, but once I saw it I couldn’t get married anywhere else 😊 I’d rather have the ultimate venue and travel a little further than regret my venue choice because of travel. Also, I had people making comments about the distance but I reminded them that if they didn’t want to travel for my wedding or book a hotel for one night, then they could very easily rsvp no and save me some money.
    Ultimately, your wedding is about you marrying your fiancé and you should do what makes you happy and not what makes other people happy. It just could be unfortunate that some people my not come or may leave early as others said. Maybe sit down with your fiancé and figure out what is more important, the venue or people not coming because of the distance.
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  • N
    Dedicated May 2022 Somerset
    Nathalie ·
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    1.5 hours really isn’t far (our venue is about that far via train for us and half the guests, and a whole drive-flight-drive for the rest of the guests!). If it’s your dream venue go for it, you’re giving people plenty of notice if they need to find accommodation/make travel arrangements, and honestly, even from a guest perspective, it’s not that far to travel in the grand scheme of things
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  • Mrsa2021
    Dedicated June 2021 Cornwall
    Mrsa2021 ·
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    We got married 3.5 hours away, we did only have immediate family though but no one complained and had a nice weekend away
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  • Yorkshirelass
    Super July 2022 Surrey
    Yorkshirelass ·
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    My parents (who are massively involved and paying for a lot of the wedding) live in East Yorkshire where I was born and brought up. I am getting married where I now live in Surrey, which is about 20 mins from my house but at least 5 hours away from my parents and 3 hours away from my sister so no it is not a big deal! I also have a lot of northern friends as I went to uni in Manchester, no one has made any comments about the distance when we sent out a Save the Date with location on it. In fact a lot of these northern friends travelled down to Surrey for my 40th a few years ago. Likewise I went up north to their weddings over the years. It is called compromise lol and it is your day!

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  • B
    Savvy October 2021 Oxfordshire
    Bella ·
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    I don’t think it’s much of an ask. As you say, people have enough notice. 90mins isn’t much in the grand scheme of things.
    It’s your day, if it’s your dream venue then go for it. If people want to be there they will be.

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  • Morgan
    Beginner June 2025 Greater Manchester
    Morgan ·
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    I’ve just booked my wedding at our dream venue that is 40 minutes away, family that I’ve told now have 3 years notice and they’re still complaining about the distance.
    I personally think, don’t worry about it too much. As long as they have plenty of notice about it then they should make the effort to get there for you
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  • D
    Beginner June 2022 Essex
    Deborah ·
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    That’s not a bad time. I went to a wedding that was nearly 2 hours away. Most of the guests came from the same way and we all booked hotel rooms. I think if you let people know early enough and local hotels then if they really want to attend they would book. Good luck and I hope you manage to get your dream venue xxx
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  • H
    Dedicated May 2022
    HappyGoldBridesmaid18836 ·
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    I don’t think that’s unreasonable at all! Like you say, people have plenty of time to sort out their travel and accommodation. If you’ve found your dream venue then go for it!
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  • L
    Beginner August 2022 Greater Manchester
    Libby ·
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    We have chosen a local venue, but I’ve attended weddings a few hours away before. You’re right, if people are being given a years notice, then that’s plenty of time to sort arrangements. It’s not like you’re asking them to get a flight or spend a week away, so I don’t think you’re being unreasonable.
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  • A
    Savvy July 2021 Devon
    Alexandra ·
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    That's not unreasonable at all, go for the venue you want. Ours was about 90 minutes away too and nobody declined - quite a lot of people either camped or found hotels locally!

    The venue really does make a huge difference to your day so if it's your dream venue then don't miss out on it - just discuss peoples concerns with them and explain you understand if they don't want to stay too late, or do some research (and ask the venue for recommendations) of local places to stay - we found Airbnb was great Smiley laugh

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  • R
    Genius July 2020 Monmouthshire
    RomanticGreenStationery27135 ·
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    I've hardly ever been to a wedding that was nearer - these days, it's unusual for all the guest list to come from the same area, so at least half end up having to travel a long way anyway.

    Ours was about 50 minutes away, but chosen to be midway between the majority of guests who were coming.

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  • ForeverFloralsEventStyling
    Beginner April 2081 Greater Manchester
    ForeverFloralsEventStyling ·
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    I don't think an hour and a half is unreasonable for your guests to travel, it's your special day and will only happen once so you have to do what feels right for you. As long as there is an option for accommodation at your venue (or local to the venue) for those that don't want to make the journey home on the evening I don't see it being a problem for those that want to be there!

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