Wedding budget

Yeah we’ve done all the costs together including the venues. I just really don’t want to be styling a place as I prefer a minimalist style and I’m not paying someone just to put up flowers and blankets just for one day. I guess I’m just worried that whatever I pick I’ll regret it.

"I’m worried people will judge me if I have a place that doesn’t look great"

If they are going to have that attitude, then they shouldn't be invited to your wedding in the first place.

Guests should be coming to support you as you make your commitment to each other and to celebrate with you - if they are going to be criticising your venue choice, then they are not the kind of supportive people you should be having around you on your wedding day.

As for the cost - it's a personal decision, but I wouldn't want to go into debt to pay for a one day celebration. I've been to some super-cheap weddings (local church and self-catered reception in village hall) and some super-expensive ones (exclusive hire of stately home with every possible unnecessary trimming added on) and both were equally special. It's the people, not the location, that makes a wedding. As long as the venue is comfortable and the food is sufficient and good, that's all you need to worry about.

View quoted message Thank you I really needed to hear that. X

Whatever you choose needs to be right for the two of you; not anybody else.

We have gone for exclusive use of a hotel/converted manor house. This is pricey, but will require far less decoration than the other slightly cheaper places we liked. On balance, we chose the venue we liked the best. I am lucky that my parents are helping with the venue and we are covering everything else.

Please don't worry that you will regret your decision, otherwise you will regret it regardless.

I think the norm is to lend money some way or another for wedding these days, it’s not completely unheard of.


During my planning I was like you, inbetween trying to be sensible and also “well I’m not getting married again”. I know money is a sensitive and tough issue at the moment with the rise in everything, but I think weddings are going to continue getting more expensive so you may aswell do want you want now. Money can always be earnt. I think it’s sensible to weigh up things like decor too.. decor business and florists can be so expensive and sometimes picking a venue that may be more expensive but needs less is cheaper in the long run! As for worrying about people, I wouldn’t bother. People will always have something to say even if jt was the best venue in the world with an all inclusive free bar!

View quoted message That is very true Sarah thank you x

I had this issue too. In the end, my fiance and I decided to write down what the things that were important to us, and what was really not that important to us.
So the wedding reception venue we've got isn't the prettiest and we likely won't be bothering to do all the bells and whistles of decorating it the way others do because it was more important to us to have as many friends as we could there. But it's got rooms on site we can get ready in, it's easy for people to get to so we don't need to put on transport, and the wedding coordinator there is fantastic and responsive. There were more than few venues when we were looking around where we showed up for appointments and no one knew about us coming - it didn't spark confidence. We also don't plan to spend money on getting fresh floral arrangements, and there's some stuff I'd love to have had, but in hindsight it wasn't really important.
Anything Martin Lewis has suggested for saving money we've done - food planning, switching bank accounts with cash incentives, cutting back on things like streaming services and going to library instead of buying books.
Your friends and family should want to come togehter to help you have the best day - anyone who's judging how 'fancy' (or not fancy) your wedding venue decor is, is not someone you should get yourself into debt to please.

In the words of Monica when she realised why Chandler wasn't happy about the suggestion all his hard earned savings should go towards one day paying for the 'dream wedding' scenario, "I don't want a wedding, I want a marriage."