Wedding dress disaster .......please help :-(

Since you are getting married in December I reckon you have got enough time to either find one off the rack or maybe find a dress maker who can make you one.

I am getting married in November and I am only being measured tomorrow evening but just depends how busy dress makers are. Mine has known about me for a while so has made sure she will have time to do mine.

What type of dress are you having? Have you got a picture? Some dresses do look ok with shoes showing, just depends what style yours is.

P.s. try not to panic because it doesn't get you anywhere. You need to try and be calm and collected and then you will make the best decision.

You have definitely got time.

Really wouldn't worry about the timescale if you do go ahead with getting another dress. I'm getting married early october and had to look for another dress at the end of July. The dress I wanted was new in the shop and I just bought the one I tried on.

Hi November Bride,

Thanks for your post.........unfortunately I don't have any pictures......... wish I had got one today as could've got some opinions.......it's a bias cut....with a high neck and small train......

Have you got drawing etc of how you wanted it to look?

Jimmy Choo for £90.....wow :-)

Only issue I have is the fact that this dress is costing £1800.....so at that price I'd expected it would be long enough and what I asked for....not something different and un-flattering

Thanks all for your comments they're all realy helpful :-)

Yes I ended up doing a drawing myself as the dress maker lost the one she did for me (on the back of a utility bill......tut)

The dressmaker did it on the back of a utility bill? have you got a contract with her? surely a dressmaker would give you proper drawings etc

Do you have any pictures of you in the dress?

No no contract just emails and a written receipt for my deposit on the back of a business card...........I feel SO stupid now as I should've seen the signs.........but she has her own shop open daily, so I thought she must be good.

Any private dress makers out there that can let me know if I'm being taken for a ride???

?

I would speak to Citizens advice if it were me. But start looking for a new dress

I agree with Claires here, this woman seems very unprofessional to me.

You would expect that paying nearly £2000 you woud get what you want

First off, sorry for your hassles, just what you don't need.

The one thing you want to do on your wedding day is feel like a princess, have goosebumps when you see yourself in the dress. If you don't feel like this, and really cannot see it being flattering on the big day, if you can afford it then walk away and start again. You still have time getting married in December to get something else that will make your day. If you cannot afford it, then i'd suggest taking someone with you who might not get so upset but to see the dressmaker and see what she can do to alter it to make the dress which is not in the design you wanted, but make it feel right for you (not frumpy).

I am getting married on 4th October, and being a bigger size and getting married a second time i did not want to go into a bridal shop and feel bad like i did last time. The assistant said to me (it was 1996 and i can still remember it clearly) we only have those ones in your size, there isnt normally a need for such big dresses! This time i decided since my hubby to be wanted a full dress i ordered it from a plus size range in the states. It came within 14 days and needed only the bust taking in slightly. I found a local dressmaker who suggested i should take the front up an inch so that you could see the toes of my shoes and the dress wouldnt be trailing in front of me, needing hitched up. I went on Monday to pick it up and it was just lovely and she was totally correct. I felt great in the dress, although i couldnt zip it up this time myself and near fainted in panic that it was too small now, until she pointed out that someone else will have to zip it up now as it is properly fitting and not too big like it was - doh!

Either way, get a big cuddle off your hubby to be tonight!

Sx?

I can't believe how mean these so called professionals can be............so glad you've got the dress of your dreams this time though :-)

I'm going to look into the citizens advice bureau.....but I doubt they will be able to help as I guess I have no proof as there is only my drawing :-(

I have however found the email she sent me stated that she would firstly do a calico design then make the dress from that..........I never saw that calico design and I most definitely didn't try it on....grrrrr!!!

I'm a dressmaker and am totally shocked at your experience. Your dressmaker should have created a calico toile prior to going anywhere near the real fabric with a pair of scissors. And, if there was any doubt at all that the fabric you choose/bought was not the right fabric for the job (it does happen), should've advised you of this before she began so that you all knew what to expect.

I must admit, when I make BMs dresses and the client has a VERY tight budget (ie. insists on having a cheap deal so I end up earning less than £2/hour) I won't mess around with a toile as I'd end up loosing money completely. But I always, always ensure the pattern fits properly and make sure I cut the fabric larger that needed to give a bit of room to play with. And insist on extra fittings along the way. It is difficult as some clients do regularly change their minds after key stages, by which time it's just too late to go back. But if you were up front with your dressmaker and had agreed everything before you started, then she should've come up with the goods or at least, told you it was possible.

Can you get the dress off her now, before she causes anymore damage and take it to another dressmaker for a second opinion. There may still be a chance to save the dress (obviously depending on the cut etc.) and turn the skirt into a mermaid style and even add a false hem on to lengthen it. You have plenty of time, so try not to panick.

If you want anymore help/advise - feel free to PM.

Hi Twigi, thanks for your post. I'm worried that she'll expect me to pay the rest of the money so that would be another £890 (of which I could use to get another dress) if I ask for the dress now as I think it's practically finished.

What would you recommend doing?

thx

Hmmm it might be a case of 'no money - no dress' i have known dressmakers to have that attitude.....

i hope you get something sorted though x

I would seriously recommend contacting the CAB to get some professional advice as that is an awful lot of money to loose.

Do you like everything else on the dress apart from the length & the skirt style? What type of silk is the dress made it - is it crisp & thick or fine & floaty? Apart from the skirt shape and length, is the rest of the dress made well ie. seams lining up, good fit, not pukering or gathering, overall hangs well etc.? Did you see any samples of the dressmaker's work before instructing her? Has she explained exactly why the fabric won't work in a mermaid style?

Where abouts are you? I would come to the dressmaker with you, but have a feeling you'll be the opposite end of the country to me!!!!

OMG, can't believe your dilema, I think if it was me I'd be in bits.

If it were me in your shoes I think I would have to cut my losses and go else where, although that is easier said than done! I think you need to let her know that you are seriously considering going elsewhere and see if she would let you take what she's done so far and try and get it sorted somewhere else.

Good luck, hope it all turns out well.

Hi Twigi - you're soooooo kind (they need to make more like you :-).....I'm in hampshire

Alas, I'm in Suffolk so quite a distance from you! Bugger!!

Seriously though, get some professional advice from the CAB. Even if you do end up cutting your loses and buying a dress elsewhere, this dressmaker should not get away with shattering peoples dreams. Make sure you stand up for yourself and your rights. Don't pay her anymore money unless you are 100% happy with the final result. And try, try, try to either get your deposit back or the dress off her in it's unfinished state - hopefully the CAB will help you with this. Then at least you'll have your money back to spend elsewhere or a dress that hopefully a more experienced dressmaker can turn around for you.

Did you only have 3 fittings? Whenever I make the most basic dresses I always insist on a miminum of 4 fittings. And the more elborate, complicated and expensive the dress - the more fittings we have!!

And if you do need anymore advice - PM me as I'm not very often on WP (spend most my time on BT these days)!

Good luck with the outcome. Be strong - don't let her get away with it!!!

I think you've been given some good advice here by Twigi, so i don't have anything to add, but just wanted to say hi, welcome and good luck. x

Just wanted to say THANK YOU all sooooooooooo much for your words of advice............hubby to be home now and getting lots of love to cheer me up :-)

Twigi - I will speak to CAB first and may come back to you for more advice..........thank you x

Ohh..this sucks...you've been badly treated and this woman shouldn't get away with her shoddy dress making! Certainly don't pay a penny more and tell her straight how you feel about the situation. Threaten not to pay and get some legal advice. Poor you...best of luck!

If I lived near you hun I would be right down at that dressmaker with you!, you paid her to carry out a design you wanted, if she doesn't make the dress the way you want it she should either re-make the dress (stuff the material SHE has "wasted", that's not your fault) and make the dress you originally wanted...she is working for you, your design, your way...not the other way around!.

Can't believe someone would try and mess up your day for you, she should know (of all people) that the dress is the most important thing of the day.

Definately speak with CAB, a contract is a contract, written or verbal and she hasn't stuck to it...if your not satisfied, get your deposit back, you paid her for a certain style which she hasn't designed so what she has there for you, is not your dress so therefore she has no right to keep any money you have given her.

You have plenty of time to get what you want.

Good luck.

P.S. Sorry, went on a bit of a rant there ?...but that annoyed me ?

DON'T pay her any more money! Take her to small claims court if neccesaary to get back what you've already paid - the most important thing is that you MUST MUST MUST feel fabulous and excited about your dress - I can't wait to wear mine!

Just remember that karma is now out to get this woman - I work in retail and we live by the mantra that if you have a good customer service experience, you will tell one person, but if you have a bad customer service experience you will tell ten people!!!! - as you have proven on here! She wouldn't get a job with me and no mistake, there is no excuse for short changing your client and not providing what you promised to provide, verbally or otherwise. Console yourself with the fact that she won't be in business very long if this is how she conducts herself.

GET SOME EMERGENCY FUNDS AND FIND A FABULOUS, ONCE IN A LIFETIME DRESS!!

How awful for you.

If the outcome is that having paid part of the money you have an unfinsihed dress it might be worth seeing Shay Harris who is in Southampton (obviously I don't know where you are in Hampshire so this still might be a distance for you).

She is a bridal shop HIB on here but also designs and makes her own bridal gowns too. https://www.shayharris.com/

WSS