Wedding Dresses- Now Scared confused and horrified

Tbh - it doesn't sound that good a shop if they couldn't help you. So sorry you had a bad experience. My second go was awful too and I felt really embarrassed and uncomfortable. The third at a good quallity bridal boutique was so much nicer. It was great!!

Look for another bridal boutique, one that stocks a range of designers. Give them a call and explain what happened. I'm sure they'll be only too happy to help and be honest with you. Your shape isn't that way out for heaven's sake. Basically, the shop you went to couldn't fit a size 16/18 bride. That's just ridiculous! Don't be put off. Just go to a different boutique. xx

They put every single one over my head accept one.... that one they asked me to step into and tried to pull it up but she ripped the back of the dress in the process (that was an a-line size 14 apparently)

I think I just need a few days to recover then maybe ill contact some other local ones to see what they say.

Where are you based? People might be able to help?

To be fair your unusual non standard body shape is not the shops fault and if they dont fit then they dont fit

im also an unusual shape too and everything has to go on over my head as they wont pull up... im a size 12+ shoulders and 12 hips but a size 8 bust a 4-6 waist - due to that jackets always rip at the arm pit (if I can even get them on me) and tight fitted dresses rip down the bum seem, I however have never blamed the makers or the shop because its no ones fault (especially not a stranger) that im an odd shape, I mean you cant honestly expect them to stock dresses in peculiar shapes on the off chance someone of that shape walks in

just accept it and move on

I love how supportive and helpful you are JJCKB. The forum is certainly a richer place for having you in it thats for sure.

But if your hips are a size 16/18 then a wedding dress size 14 will not fit. Dresses are notoriously undersized meaning a 14 is more like a 10 or a 12. They should have been trying an 18 on you. Yes it would be too big on top but that's why you get them altered to fit.

I really feel for you. We're too body consious as it is and things like this don't help. You will find a dress and a shohp that can fit you. Promise!!

Kind of missing the point JJKCB - obviously no one expects a sample to fit perfectly, but if they at least had some samples in a 16/18 she'd be able to get them on to work out if the style suits her.

To the OP - unfortunately it's a common issue that bridal shops just seem to cater to size 10s. Depending on where you live, there are some specialist "plus size" bridal shops, or you can call local bridal shops and ask if they have larger samples in stock. Try not to let it get you down, you are definitely not the first person this has happened to.

The bespoke route may be a good one to take, to get a dress that fits you perfectly! Taking in a size 18 dress at the top to a size 10 to fit you may prove rather tricky, and could mess up the design of the bodice, especially if there is pretty detail on it.

Have a chat with a bespoke dressmaker, collect a Pinterest board full of images with what you want AND dont want, to show the dressmaker. She may come up with something beyond your imagination, and you wont be limited to just princess style dresses :-)

Agreed!!

OP - every woman is a different shape, so please don't allow comnents like this to put you off. A good bridal shop will have samples that you will fit in and will be able to give you advice regarding alterations. Tell us where you live and brides in your area will give you recommendations I am sure x

I went to 3 bridal shops and all said they stock dresses in 12 and 18 so the can cover a majority of bridal sizes and shapes. Granted some had to clamp me in with bulldog clips on most of the dresses but I really feel for you. It's a nerve wracking experience, especially if you're not confident in yourself or being the centre of attention, so to have this is heartbreaking. Try phoning other stores you'd like to visit and as what size samples they stock. Most stores aren't like that. Most stores won't try and force you into something that won't fit and thinking about it nearly all the dresses went over my head regardless of the size of skirt, granted it was like swimming in some cases to reach the top.... I hope you feel better soon. Best way is to get back out there and overwrite the experience with a fabulous one xxxx

I'm in the Milton Keynes area if anyone know's of anywhere.

I've already spoken to Estilo Moda about a bespoke option but I really think I need to see some of the elements 'on' to make sure I am confident of what exactly I am designing and how it will look on me.

In response to JJKCB congratulations on being so confident you have the ability to run those who are not even further down. I was prepared for dress shopping I rang in advance with my sizes, I spoke to them to ask for advice on what would fit me I stuck to the options they pointed out and out of the 8 which they couldn't get me into 6 were chosen by the assistant but thank you for assuming I am stupid enough to not be able to know my own body shape or to deliberately try on clothing which is too small for me... I am all too aware of my own body shape and the fact that finding dresses is difficult which is why I came to this forum for support after such a disastrous day.

(sorry everyone else still a big mess after yesterday ?)

To everyone else thank you for your advice, it's definitely helping me to remember that one bad sales assistant doesn't mean I won't find something. I can try on just to get ideas of what I want... tomorrow I'll get back on the phone to try to find some local places where I can try a few things on!

Thank you, in some ways I wish I had had a second appointment booked yesterday as it wouldn't be as bad as ending a day feeling that 80% of whats out there I can't try on.

I remember the large bull dog clips from my friend trying on dresses last year (she's a size 8 so everything swamped her) but I was still very shocked that they were trying to put me into dresses I remember her trying on last year!

I've got a few days off during the week this week so might try going on my on a week day as places might have more time to help that way.

Thank you Flora, I'll ring round and see who stocks a plus size range I just need to see the ideas really especially for skirts to work out what I can do, unless it works out really stupid expensive I think if I end up ordering a size 18 dress to get the top altered down to a 10 I'll loose any detail/ end up paying for the whole dress being reconstructed anyway!

OP - there's a shop in stony Stratford and Newport Pagnell (sorry I don't know the names) that 2 of my friends bought their dresses from and had very positive experiences. They are both size 14 plus.

Please don't be put off, this should be a lovely part of the planning process for you. Just try again when you're feeling a bit better

OOH OOH! I'm in MK too and I bought my wedding dress from About A Bride in Fenny Stratford. They're a specialist plus size store and, as a size 18, I had an amazing time in there. Most of the sample dresses are in a size 24 and upwards, but the ladies were amazing at clipping bits and holding the dresses in a certain way to give me an idea of how they could fit when altered. The dress I bought had to be altered a fair bit to suit my figure, but they did a stunning job and not once did I feel uncomfortable or self-conscious. I couldn't recommend them highly enough.

Definitely try a different shop!! I went to one where all of the dresses were tiny, makes you feel so uncomfortable!! The shop I bought my dress in most of the dresses were 20+ so that they would fit most brides, it's much better being too big and they can clip them in at the side.

p.s. I'm normally a size 12 and the dress I need is an 18 so don't be put off by sizes, they are generally small made!!!!

I used to live in Milton Keynes! And even when I did live there I planned on going to the Wedding Dress Factory Outlet in Leicestershire or London, I think they even have a plus size range that they do? Might be worth a look!

Just to reiterate what others have said. Don't let one shop put you off. I didn't enjoy my dress shopping experience and it wasn't at all the joyful 'oh wow that's the one' experience some others have so don't feel alone in that.

Find a shop where they can help you properly. And amending a dress to any size without losing the detailing is entirely achievable by a good seamstress. Don't lose hope and try again. ?

If you fancy heading into London, David's Bridal in Stratford go up to a size 30 and they stock each of their dresses in a variety of sizes. They also have a plus size range but you should be able to try on almost any of the ranges in your size! I had some questions and they got the alterations guy out while I was trying on the dress so he could give me proper advice - better than the sales assistants who don't have anything to do with alterations! As others have said, it can significantly change the dress.

Please dont let one awful experience put you off. Not all dress shops are the same and Im sure you will find a large number of size 10s and 12s who have also had bad dress shopping experiences. I think if we dont feel that we conform to the "norm" when dress shopping that it is something wrong with our shape, not the goods that shops are supplying.

Firstly let me reassure you that your shape is NOT a problem. I have ladies that have the same differences in bust/waist/hip ratios that you have and a size 16 bust and 24 hips is something we deal with every week. It is actually a lot easier to fit a dress to your shape than it is to somebody who is top heavy as despite what you put on the bottom half the boobs always make an entrance first! To be hippy is much easier as there are any ways to balance out the shoulders and bust whilst making the bottom half simply disappear under the right shaped skirt.

The first thing you need to do is get your confidence back. Visit shops on recommendation from friends or pick a few based on reviews and ring them before hand to check if they have gowns to fit you properly (and I mean you can get them on all the way up) and how many they have. I have had quite a few customers who have rung shops and asked if they have a plus sized range to get there (after travelling some considerable distance) to find half a dozen grubby size 16s pushed at the end of a rail that have obviously been there a while. There are some amazing gowns out there at the moment, to suit all shapes and sizes and theres probably the best choice possible for larger ladies at the moment. I dont mean that in an offensive way, and Im sorry if I make anybody feel uncomfortable. Wedding dresses are notoriously small (usually 2 sizes smaller than high street clothing) so its hardly surprising with most boutiques stocking size 10 and 12 samples that very few people can get in them.

Keep looking, the operfect gown is out there and when you find it you will feel absolutely amazing!

This sounds like a bad shop to me, surely as the others have said they should have tried you in a bigger dress. My friend is bigger on the hips and they just put her in a bigger size and pinned the top so she could see what it would look like once it had been adjusted, not rocket science surely but maybe I'm missing the point.

Is there anyway you could get a recommendation before you go to your next shop?

I'm from MK too

Total agree, go to About a Bride, the lady is lovely

Duplicate Post

I just put this on another post, so sorry for being repetitive, but with wedding dresses they order to your biggest measurement and take in the rest. My large busted friend who is size 14 had to order a dress in a 20 and then have the waist taken in. She was very upset about sizing until her finished dress arrived and it looked perfect, at which point the original size did not matter at all. You can go for whatever style dress you want. You dont have to have a ballgown if you want aline. Try another shop. Sounds to md like its thier problem for being unhelpful not yours for being the way you are.