Wedding Etiquette in inviting certain work colleagues

Hi im new here. What a predicament youre in! It is very strange how she is suddenly excluding you now, I think shes probably jealous of you tbh. Just say numbers are limited for you, that you cant invite everyone, only close friends really. If they have a problem with that then tough...its your day not theirs. Im a midwife and i work in a huge maternity hospital and couldnt possibly invite all my colleagues lol, as there are hundreds of us......dont know if ive been any help to you or not, but i think you should do what feels right for you, nobody else.

I think you're going to upset someone no matter what you do tbh! I have the same sort of issue though. We have an 'email everything' way of working so I was going to send a round robin email saying that people are welcome in the evening, however there are a few people who I don't want to invite from work so instead I'll be sending an evening invite to the people that I do want there then there can be no confusion. It'll mean a little bit of extra money in ordering those extra invites but I think it's worth it not to have people there that you really don't want there.

Hi :-) As i see it, its like you would with any other invite, be it a birthday, christening etc., you invite WHOEVER you want to invite and as the others have said, someones nose will be put out of joint somewhere along the line, but hey so what its your big day and have who you want there. I work with about 28 people and are only inviting about 10 as i really dont have the numbers for the budget we are on and if they cant appreciate that then tough luck as i see it. I dont get on with some of them anyway so i dont think it would be a complete suprise to them anyway. Dont feel obliged to invite those you dont want just to save face

Personally when it comes to work collegues, I don't think there is an 'etiquette' quite often its more down to politics.

Your wedding is about a special day for both of you, and you just want and need the people around you that you love and care about and love and care about you. - and thats the people you need to invite, and those people only.

I have a work related issue too with regards to my hen do. I work in a fairly large department and there are a few of us who socialise out of work. There is one colleague who is a line manager of one of the others that I am friendly with but she doesn't like to socialise with her direct report as she thinks it is unprofessional (which I can sort of understand).

After pondering this for several weeks, I decided that I would like them both there and so would send an open email to all invited so that she can see her direct report is invited, then she can decide if she wants to come or not. Shame if she doesn't, but it will be her decision not mine.

I say invite whoever you want to invite, it's your hen party/wedding!

Thanks to all of you who took the time to reply, I really appreciated it

I think all of you have said what's in my heart, I know deep-down I do not want any of these people there, and to invite them would prove that they have the right to treat me badly. I guess I'm just afraid of the repurcussions at work afterwards, but I guess that's a small price to pay!

Has anyone got any advice as to how to say they aren't invited if asked? Because I know it'll come up when they mention arranging this "hen do" for me (which i dont want!!)

Thanks everyone xx

Just blame it on the venue capacity and your large family taking up all the room!

We are just going to tell people we don't have the space or budget to have anymore than our closest family and friends.

I'm relieved to find that someone else is wrestling with their work colleague Guest List.

In my case it's my immediate boss I don't wish to invite as we don't get on. My OH used to work at my office a fews years ago (that's how we met) so he knows some of the longer term staff. When we started drawing up our guest list, we cherry-picked the colleagues we'd both known and liked. At my place there's 30+ staff, so inviting everyone would have been expensive, and there are people who I don't like and who don't like me.

After much thinking, we've decided that when we do send out the invitations, we're going to ask those invited to be discreet. If anyone queries it, we're going to explain that the venue isn't massive (which is partly true). OH just keeps saying "it's our day, why should we invite people we don't like?".

We have a similar issue. I work with approximately 18 other people but i literally only see some of them for 5 minutes a day! All of them bar one i class as work colleagues not friends. But i am one to make a song and dance about things so have been talking alot about the wedding and what i have done and would feel bad not inviting them. I don't think all of them would come but i have decided that i am going to invite them all to the evening as they will be our only extras compared to the day guests.

I think you should invite who you want there on your day. Some people may take offence but they will soon get over it and there will be something else for them to talk about soon after i'm sure.