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Dedicated October 2022 East London

Wedding gifts

Ebony, 13 of February of 2021 at 18:41 Posted on Planning 0 7
So, my fiancé and I have lived together for 4 years in a lovely little rented flat and pretty much have everything we need. Whilst wedding planning his brother mentioned you can tactfully ask for cash instead of a gift if people want to get you something.

I'm all for buying wedding gifts but we have everything we want and need and don't see the sense having duplicated gifts.
I've read some people think it's tacky and others think it makes sense as you can save rhe money and spend it on things you later need or want. I must stress we are not planning on demanding money, it's simply an alternative to buying a physical gift, it's optional and they can remain anonymous of they want. Also we are not inviting people for the sole purpose of them paying for our wedding. What's everyone's thought on this?

7 replies

Latest activity by Luxuriouspinkdiamonds70848, 20 of February of 2021 at 17:44
  • R
    VIP July 2020 Monmouthshire
    RomanticGreenStationery27135 Online ·
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    If you don't need things/money, why not suggest donations to a charity? My husband and I requested donations to a small charitable concern overseas - he has spent some time volunteering there and I know the people involved in it via relatives back here, so it was something that had a connection for both of us.

    We did still get given a few small gifts from people who were adamant they had to give US something, but most people were happy to donate, and it was lovely to know the project got a much needed financial boost.

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  • E
    Dedicated October 2022 East London
    Ebony ·
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    Ah I never thought of that. Very good idea, thank you.
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  • HappyPinkHair15172
    Dedicated September 2022 Merseyside
    HappyPinkHair15172 ·
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    I'm using a poem to ask for cash rather than gifts as we have lived together for years, and we are both in our 50's.

    There's loads of examples to choose from!

    We've also used a little poem to make it clear that children are not included on the invites to their parents!

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  • Kirsty
    Curious July 2022 Gloucestershire
    Kirsty ·
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    I think it’s much more common now for people to ask for money or donations than it used to be. Cohabiting before marriage is now such a norm that many people already own the items they want. I personally would rather give money or a gift card to somewhere like John Lewis’ to my friends now than buy a trinket on a registry that I wonder if it’s just there for the sake of it. I think if you phrase it correctly using a fun message or poem, people will understand!
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  • E
    Dedicated October 2022 East London
    Ebony ·
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    Sounds like a good idea. Thanks you.
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  • E
    Dedicated October 2022 East London
    Ebony ·
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    Yes, someone else suggested a nice poem too so we'll probably go down that route.
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  • L
    Beginner August 2021 Suffolk
    Luxuriouspinkdiamonds70848 ·
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    I agree with the above, it is far more common for people to ask for cash now. Have you thought about asking for contributions to your honeymoon? If you have planned your honeymoon/know what you want to do, there are websites which allow guests to contribute to an experience/day out/hotel etc for your honeymoon. Whilst in effect they are still paying cash, as they are purchasing an 'experience', this might make them feel they are contributing something more meaningful, and for you both, it will help towards the honeymoon costs?

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