What do you call a "buy your own drinks" bar?

When we have Ball invites they usually word it as a Cash bar (even though they accept cards too).

I'd be tempted to use the term cash and then include information re: Cards / tabs etc on your website?

My first thought was a 'pay bar' as its not a 'free bar' and its not a 'cash bar' as they take cards....I think they'll understand what you mean if you put 'pay bar'.

My first thought was "there will be a cash bar, cards also accepted"...

I never go to a wedding without cash!!

As the bar takes both cash and cards I'd be inclined to ignore the faff over what to call the bar all together. Why not find out costs and say something like

'Whilst we are providing soft drinks, the bar will be open from X o'clock. Glasses of wine start from £XX and a pint of larger is £X. Both cash and cards are accepted'.

This way it highlights that people will have to pay their own and it'll also help with budgeting. As a guest, I'd like to know how far my 'spends' will go! Some venues are far more pricey than others and this way no one will have a nasty shock when paying for a round of drinks.

Thanks for the input so far; will take that into account and report back in due course.

First draft was thus

As many of you are driving some distance to join us, we have decided to arrange a non alcoholic drinks package for the day, with fruit juice, water and Schloer for toasts during the day, which we hope you will understand our reasoning for. However, there will be a private ‘pay bar’ for our use only adjacent to our main ceremony room. It accepts cash or you can set up a ‘tab’ if you have a credit card. Prices are reasonable such as Gaymers at £4.55/pint, Boddingtons at £3.30/pint, shots from £2.50 etc .

If I'm honest, the bit about 'we hope you'll understand our reasons for' strikes me as a bit wanky. If you don't want to serve booze, you don't have to. What you'd said sounds very apologetic and would make me think that there was some underlying unpleasant reason, rather than it just being personal choice.

Just my tuppence worth, though.

PAAAHAHAHA this cracked me up! I say Wanky all the time hahahahaha

And for the record - I agree with this sentiment..it does sound a bit wanky...lol

AJ, i'd be inclined to focus mainly on the up beat message of it all (your note sounds a tiny bit "business like")

you've covered yourself with the "buy something stronger" and let them know the soft drinks are free too! most people would expect to buy their own drinks including soft drinks anyway, so your offering of free soft drinks i am sure will be a welcome gesture....

how about.... As many of you are driving some distance to join us, we have arranged free soft drinks all day for you, but there will be a bar for those of you who would like to buy something stonger to celebrate with us! It accepts cash or you can set up a ‘tab’ if you have a credit card. Prices are reasonable and generally on par with most public houses

I agree with the bit about the reasoning. If you don't want to serve alchohol, that's your choice and nothing you should apologise for. I do think it's good to let people know what to expect, though.

I went to a wedding at the end of last year where the bride didn't drink, but the groom did. All day there were only soft drinks at the table and they didn't open the bar until 7pm, by which time most people were gasping for a pint! We didn't even know, though, that the bar would open at 7pm, so we spent all day thinking that we wouldn't have any alchohol to drink.

Personally I wouldn't even list prices as I think it sounds a bit odd, I'd just go with something along the lines of "we will be providing non alcoholic drinks throughout the day, or for those of you wishing to purchase alcoholic drinks a private bar accepting cash and cards is available."

I like that one Natalie, just don't know how to cover those that aren't joining us for the wedding breakfast - will they expect to sit in the other hotel bar and be provided with free soft drinks all afternoon?

Or is it kinda understood that you get free drinks only during the bits you've been invited to?

I would be tempted to send two different letters as your situation is unusual. Send the line that Natalie wrote to those invited to the breakfast and reword it for those not invited to say more simply "there will be a cash bar available at the hotel...blah blah"... you get my drift!

AJ

are you saying that daytime guests will get free drinks ALL DAY AND NIGHT or just during the day? and does that mean that the evening guests will get free soft drinks on the evening too?

I would be inclined to put this note to the day time guests and dont put anything to the evening guests, they will be expecting to buy drinks anyway so dont draw attention to the fact that the day time guests got something they didnt. also i would only do free soft drinks until say 5pm or until the dj/evening entertainment starts. let me know and maybe i can re jig the wording again for you

Nice idea - we'll provide free soft drinks up until the first dance I think (7.30pm) then people can use up whats on the tables and that's their lot.

The private pay bar opens at 4pm (although the hotel bar is open earlier). We don't want people sneaking off during the photos for a pint.

We're using Word and mailmerging from a custom database so it's just an IF/THEN/ELSE statement in the letter. Simples!

Why not? You'll be having your photos taken!

Hows about this then

(WB) As many of you are driving some distance to join us, we have arranged free soft drinks all day for you from after the ceremony up until the first dance at around 7.30pm. However, there will be a bar for those of you who would like to buy something stonger to celebrate with us. It accepts cash or you can set up a ‘tab’ if you have a credit card. Prices are reasonable, such as Gaymers at £4.55/pint, Boddingtons at £3.30/pint, shots from £2.50 etc .

(EVENING ONLY) As many of you are driving some distance to join us, we have arranged free soft drinks from the start of the evening reception up until the first dance at around 7.30pm as well as immediately after our ceremony and blessing. However, there will be a bar for those of you who would like to buy something stonger to celebrate with us. It accepts cash or you can set up a ‘tab’ if you have a credit card. Prices are reasonable, such as Gaymers at £4.55/pint, Boddingtons at £3.30/pint, shots from £2.50 etc .

After the group shots, when they have been dismissed, they may wish to head towards the bar. We haven't yet decided if we're going to go off and have some photos with just the two of us and the photographer, partly because we won't be having wedding cars due to everything being in the main venue.

It will be the job of the ushers, armed with electric cattle prods, to keep everyone in the photography area and to follow instructions promptly so that we may get through all the photos in the most painless (as long as they cooperate) way possible.

When we have been invited to weddings we have never been told what we will or wont get before we arrive. I have recently been to free bar and cash bar weddings and we always expect to have to pay for our own drinks and then its a nice extra if we don't have to!

We have sent out invites and thats all, we are paying for arrival drinks, drinks with meal and champagne toast and that all but I wont be warning everyone that they will have to pay for there own extra drinks as i think its a bit rude for a guest to assume it will all be paid for them.

Its a nice thought that you want to send out a letter but I wouldn't stress too much about how it is worded and explaining yourselves as someone else says it does come across that there is some underlying reason for your choice.

Could you include a copy of your menu and put what drinks are included on this and maybe add that the venue also has a 'cash bar' 'pay bar' for guests to purchase drinks?

Right reassessed and i'd go with

As a thank you for joining us, we have arranged free soft drinks for you during the day, but there will also be a bar for those of you who would like to buy something stonger to celebrate with us! It accepts cash or you can set up a ‘tab’ if you want to pay by card.

I wouldn't put a time on it and just send a "looking forward to seeing you" to your evening guests.

Obviously there's a lot more to the letter than "bring money to buy alcohol" - it's just this one bit I was having problems wording correctly, and if I was saying something that people might take offense to, someone would be bound to pick it up.

Many people do still expect to have free drinks as well as food - I recall hearing a story of a brides father putting £2000 behind the bar for the evenings drinks, and it all went in half an hour. I just want to, whilst writing, let people know about it, that's all.

Indeed, and there will be a test before we allow them on the premises - if they can't behave themselves then they can jolly well go home again (after they've left their gifts, of course).

(you may note that some of my last few posts aren't exactly completely without tongue in cheek humour).

Personally, I think it is rude for you to be taking the role of policeman and not letting these people have a drink if they want. Its a wedding. Not everyone is driving and if people are, then they already know the drink driving rule. They should be responsible enough to make a decision as to who is driving and who isn't. Planning a wedding is stressful enough without trying to control everything.

I think a simple, "there is a cash bar serving alcohol after 4pm. The venue accepts cash and card" is enough.

Like I said, that is my own personal opinion.

I hope your guests have a lovely time. ?

That sounds good and gets the message across - think your guests will be very happy with their free drinks all day. Just make sure you correct the typo from stonger to stronger!

Stonger makes me think of something rude!!

We aren't preventing anyone from having as much alcohol as they wish - the only difference is we're not going to be paying for any of it. We aren't controlling anyone's drinking habits, merely not providing alcohol. It may be unusual but is that really such a great crime? From what I know of the people we've invited, none of them are going to be upset not to get any free alcohol provided, and as alcohol is not something either of us consider particularly important we don't feel it a great loss either.

I would take the inverted commas out and just say tab rather than "tab" - but then that is because I am a lifelong hater of inverted commas. I just think they're a bit pretentious.