Anyone put any unusual requests in your invites?

Quite simply actually

We are only having an intimate affair of my nearest and dearest friends and family with 25 guests in the day approx 12 female guests which includes our mums, my sister, MOH, 2 nieces (flower girls)

We have already brought the flower girl dresses and will be buying MOH outfit as tradition (when she gets back from travelling).

We are also treating our mums to a new outfits of their choice (OH has already brought his mum hers, hat included!)I didn’t want to leave my dad out so I will also be treating him to a new suit etc too (Not into the how matching bridal party thing)

All our other guests already have suitable attire to wear (I know this because they have been in our lives for 20+ years!! and we have seen what they wear at other weddings, Ascot, etc etc) However when we handed out our save the dates all our other female friends were happy to have an excuse to buy a new frock, shoes, hat etc, my sis has even said she wants to come stay with me so we can have a shopping weekend in London. They are all adults and can choose to buy themselves something new if they wish but this is certainly not a result of any recommendations regarding attire we make in the additional information accompanying our invites.

I have seen every single one of my female guests wear a hat or fascinator on more than one occasions so I know nobody has an issue with it, if I didn’t know this already it would be a bit silly wouldn’t it? (Like having a pool party when none of your friends can swim?)

My guests are my friends and family so if on the day they choose not wear a hat no biggie I probably will not even notice (as long as they don’t turn up joggers as that would be an issue in certain parts of the hotel)

My friends all live in London so can either walk, tube, bus, train to the venue all transport which they already have a travel cards for because they are used for their daily commute (or they may spend a couple of £ take a taxi which one friend probably will because shes always late but again that's their choice) So that only leaves the family we are paying for transport for my family in Kent and even flights for OH's mum.

Any hair and make up costs are no different to what they would be on any other night out again their choice!

So they are buying outfits then? Theres one expense. Do you have a completely paid for bar?

Do they already know they can't buy a black dress then?

They can wear whatever colour they like im not colour prejudice ?

My friend had an evening wedding in December, people had already asked her what they should wear before she even sent out the invites (following the save the dates) so she put dress code: glitz & sparkles - I thought that was fab!

Oops sorry lost track of this thread & thought you were OP!

They may do yes but they don't have too? like i said their choice.

we have some money behind the bar yes... so if they drink like fish on the night they may have to buy some drinks but again that is their choice.

Don't blame you this is a looooong thread.

Am I the only one who's still curious about the original post and wondering whether people have put any "unusual requests" in their invites that aren't dress code related?

*runs out quickly before someone announces their guests have to bring a dove to release or something.....

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why oh why diddnt I exploit this? Of course I should have asked for everyone to come dressed as a giant Hello Kitty!

Ladies being a bridezilla is not cool.

I'm glad you said this because I was wondering the same????????

turning up in black would make them nasty?! Jesus wept woman where do you live? Care Bear land?!

You haven't included outfits. And that cost is only to feed, water and accommodate your guests (none of the other wedding costs included)?

noooo! sssshhhhh! don't rile the pigeon-lobbing brigade!

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stick around further than 58 posts and you may just get there.

That would be amezin!!!!!

It's not about how good a friend people are or being nasty "for no reason". My lovely guests travelled all of the way to Barbados for my wedding. My wonderful bestie came all that way with her whole family (husband and two children). She literally took her family half way around the world for me, that's how good a friend she is. However, if I had dared to dictate to them what they could and couldn't wear... even if I had gotten married around the corner from where we all live, noses would have been put out of joint with a colour dress code. Perhaps not to my face...they might have *just about* managed to refrain from telling me to F Off while I flounced around dictating my colour choices, but there would have quite likely been a lot of resentful guests having a grumble when my back was turned.

? Wahahahaha funniest line ever.

It annoys me being told what to wear. I don't even like fancy dress parties for this reason - I don't have the time or the inclination to faff around over an outfit. It already takes me a long time to find things I like/am happy to invest in; I can do without this process being unnecessarily lengthened by a bloody colour embargo.

I even get peed off when hen parties make you wear a sash...I am a precious old *** and I don't like disrupting my outfit with a sash that says "Helen's Horny Hens".

I do think I am a particularly stroppy bugger with these things, and have thrown maaaany a stinker when I have realised that there is some sort of stipulation over clothing.

I also think I have a better idea what is and isn't appropriate at any occasion than someone who thinks it is appropriate to specify clothing items/descriptions to grown adults.

In short; I would object.

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My humble cabbage, for what it's worth, is that I wouldn't feel the need to put a dress code on my invitations as I trust my friends and family to know what is and isn't appropriate wedding attire. The only thing that would annoy me at my wedding is if someone came in a wedding dress!

If I received an invitation saying that the dress code was 'please do not wear black' I'd think it maybe a bit unusual that the bride felt she had to say that, but would happily comply as I wouldn't wear black to a wedding anyway (as long as it was politely phrased). If it was a more unusual request like 'must wear yellow' I might be a bit miffed, as I don't have anything in that colour and it doesn't suit me. But I think no black is fine, for me anyway...

I think what this thread has proved is that everyone takes these things differently, and so it's a bit risky if you're going to put a dress code on your invites as some people may be offended. But I've actually found with planning a wedding as a whole it's impossible not to offend people - choosing bridesmaids, guest list, asking people to travel, asking people to pay for a hen do...etc, but you can't please all of the people all of the time. Although it's nice to bear people's feelings in mind, really you just need to do what makes you and your future husband happy.

Hey Mini. If you're going to quote me, at least quote me in context. ?

No way am I being put in the bridezilla camp.

Don't remember mentioning you as a bridezilla teaparty?

Wasn't serious Mini. Hence the winking face (never used one of those before and probably won't ever again). So hard sometimes to get the right tone when typing. I can't actually be a bridezilla either because I'm a MOB.

I love a good debate and this thread has been a bit of light relief between printing order of service and googling "sweet buffets".

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this will never get old!!

This thread has reminded me of my ex's bridezilla of a sister-in-law.

The wedding was in Antigua and at £1000 per person just for flights and accommodation for a week it wasn't a cheap trip! Despite the cost, the groom's mum and auntie treated themselves to new outfits. My ex was best man and had to buy a light beige coloured suit in order to match his brother (the groom).

The night before the wedding the bride threw a huge strop because she wanted all the guests to wear "neutral" colours and the mum and auntie had outfits which were not "neutral". This was the first time she had mentioned anything about what the guests should wear!! Luckily the mum and auntie said stuff her and wore their outfits anyway! I saw the photos afterwards and it really didn't make any difference what the guests wore in the grand scheme of things!

I wasn't able to go due to cost but if I had been there I would've been raging. If you are set on having a dress code, at least tell your guests before they get to the venue!!

Just spent the last fifteen minutes reading through some of the responses to this thread.......thank you for the biggest laugh Ive had all week!!!!

This cat makes me insanely happy.

Totally missed this thread initially. Just spent goodness knows how long reading it from start to finish and now the cabbage that appeared in another thread an hour ago makes perfect sense.

Nothing else I can say that hasn't been said except I'd hate to be a guest at your wedding when wearing a dress with black in, having the fear that all the other guests including the bride are whispering about it behind my back. My cabbage is that if you're noticing the guests attire, you need more entertainment.

Wow long thread! I'm surprised so many people would be miffed at being asked not to wear black!

I agree its odd how it seems ok for guests to be asked to wear a specific colour, but not ok to ask them to steer away from just one colour?!

I think its a bit of a funeral colour too and maybe if you word it positively on your invites people wont kick up a fuss ?

Bit dissapointed that no-one else has any controversial requests...