Advice Please

Hi,

I was hoping for 1 bridesmaid but not sure if she'll want to travel 200 miles to where we thinking of having the wedding.

with regard to the first dance it just that i don't see the point of having a DJ when most of the family are parents and grand parents and about 5 young people but I still feel like i'd be missing out on something if that makes sence as we have a song and would love to dance to it.

We're thinking of hiring a small room in a pub or something and having a sit down 3 course meal (dinner) as hoping for a late afternoon wedding.

I just feel like i'll miss out i'm quite a shy person too though

You can do all those things relatively cheaply if you take care, a nice dress for your BM can be bought on the high street, and anything else isn't necessary if she wears her own shoes. If the groom is wearing his own suit then the best man can too. Would 2nd the M&S cake bit too as they are really excellent. Does the pib not have a duke box or some other kind of music as most places have something.

You can still have a first dance if you want, it's your wedding. just put on cd ipod or whatever.

also have bridesmaid if it's important to you. just explain to her about budget and you could say she can wear what she wants (ie she has to provide outfit). if she is close friend sure she will understand.

Yes, I was going to say that. Just have a cd or something. Then you still get the dance. Ditto also about bridesmaid providing own outfit. Alternatively, you could ask her to do a reading at the ceremony which means she'd provide her own outfit.

I think small weddings can be lovely. A friend has raved about a wedding he was at where the venue after the ceremony was a local pub - the couple put a fixed amount of money behind the bar so guests had their first few drinks paid for and if they wanted a meal they were free to go downstairs and buy themselves a meal in the dining area of the pub.

Quirky stuff like sending the best man round to the local chippie for 25 portions of cod and chips can be just as memorable and special as a big blow out 4 course dinner! If it's just really close friends and family that are there they'll think it's a fabulous day regardless because all they will want is to see how happy you are marrying your man.

It's your wedding so have what you and your fiance want but just plan around it.

I only wanted my sister as BM, her dress was £45 in Debenhams sale (Debut BM dress), she wore her own wedding shoes so just bouquet for £35. 1 Best Man would then balance nicely and suit hire £50-70 or could wear his own if he had it. Our attendants were useful on the day helping with the photography list, announcements, collating cards & gifts and generally helping out.

We also had an M&S cake which was just the plain one when we got married 2 years ago, it was delicious and guests couldn't believe it wasn't a "proper" wedding cake.

Suggestions around a CD or iPod for first dance are great and def ask others to join you - we did and have also done so at many other weddings.

It's a little odd to pay for the meal but not drinks, you could maybe budget at £7-8 per head or bring your own (ask about corkage). We did go to a wedding where only the welcome and toast drinks were included and it was a bit odd as people had to keep getting up to get drinks - it was also in a community hall and they only had wine on tap but that's another story!

We got our guestbook on e-bay for around £6 but you could just get a small notebook and decorate it yourself, maybe after the wedding with a photo of the two of you. We did love ours as we got loads of comments about the day, food and venue which obviously weren't mentioned in pre written cards.

<big head>You're planning almost exactly the wedding I had and people still say it was the best wedding they've been too </big head>

The main difference being that we planned ours in just under 3 1/2 weeks. So if you've got until 2011, I think you could easily save enough. I'll give a brief rundown of the day:

Dress cost me £35 from a vintage evening wear shop - twas white and weddingy and everything!

H and Best man both had Kilt suits (peasant style) - bought H's kilt around £140, other hired and was under £100.

Sis was bridesmaid and essentially wore her own clothes. i was happy to spring for a 'proper' dress but she wasn't comfortable. She looked gorgeous though.Whole outfit about £60. The rest of the men - Dad, FIL, my bro all hired the same kilt suits so it looked fab. They decided that amongst themselves though so they paid for them.

(Best man and bridesmaid acted as witnesses at the registry office)

Ceremony was at 3pm.

Then on to a lovely Italian restaurant in Glasgow city centre with 25 guests. They had an area at the back for large groups and sat us comfortably. They even made the menus into scrolls and headed them as the reception of Mr & Mrs...etc. I managed to negotiate 3 courses with 3 options each course for £12.95ph (I'm very persuasive ?, I talked them into it by pointing out the price of their pre-theatre menu and mentioned how much they'd make on the bar on a Wednesday afternoon) We were happy to pay for drinks but my mum surprised us and paid the bar tab (about £400) as our wedding gift.

We had an M&S cake (snap Champagne!). MIL decorated it with a cruise ship as that's where H&I met. We eat a lot of wedding cake in our line of business and it was one of the best we've ever tasted!

After that, back to the hotel we were staying in for the night for drinks at the bar.

We didn't have an evening reception as such but the following night we had a party in a club in G;asgow. 2for1 drinks, room free to hire (but open to the public after 11) and invited all the folk we couldn't have on the day itself. Obviously there was a DJ already so that was another saving. Bargain queen? Moi? ? Had an absolute ball!

My H is pretty shy so it all suited him down to the ground. Plus we work in the wedding industry and hated the idea of a 'typical' wedding with all the pomp and circumstance. Too much of a busman's holiday for us.

The whole thing cost less than £2000. Um, not sure if I've left anything out but if you'd like any help at all in planning a fab wedding on a budget, I'd love to give you a hand. You can have anything you want with some creative planning.

x