four weeks to go, slight rant..

Perhaps you can sell the dress to make some money back? And in the meantime keep your eye out for something that would work as a replacement. What colour/style are you looking for?

Do you have a flash of the dress? Some people are more lucky than others at losing the pregnancy belly - I left the hospital in my pre-pregnancy jeans! In what ways does it not fit?

ooooohh! what are you doing for your hen? I bet you'll gradually get more excited throughout the day! x

She isn't going to get in the dress at this stage, so don't waste time and emotion on it, make a practicle plan. Sell the dress and buy one less expensive, ask her if she can contribute to the cost, or get a dressmaker to look at letting it out. I bought this this week off Amazon and I love it

http://www.amazon.co.uk/s?ie=UTF8&search-type=ss&index=clothing&field-keywords=Pretty%20Kitty%20Fashion

I don't know how to flash on here, it's dark purple and mid calf length, I love it!

and it's just her tummy, but the zip really won't close, even half way, I'm just not sure how long to leave it before I have to drag her out to look for something else.

We're doing cocktail classes, followed by a mini bar crawl, then a meal then maybe further bars, see how it goes

Is it strapless? Do u think it would be possible to add a panel of material down the side- a bride in here showed how they had done this to her BM dress when they found out she was expecting and no one could tel it wasnt supposed to be like that! Suppose it depends on the material etc? Could u post a link to the dress? x x

Have you had a look on eBay? I got one of mine from there, as my dresses were from an outlet so there were no more sizes available. Here are some ive found:

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Debenhams-Debut-Cadburys-Purple-Prom-Bridesmaid-dress-Size-12-worn-once-/140763387721?pt=UK_Women_s_Dresses&hash=item20c626d749

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/debut-Debenhams-mauve-Purple-bride-bridesmaid-prom-ball-evening-10-12-/170851176490?pt=UK_Women_s_Dresses&hash=item27c786102a

Also, is it anywhere near to fitting? how about those spanx things that suck you in? 😃

Is it this one

Eight weeks to get back into shape?? I think that's a bit much to expect even with the baby being born on time... but that is not the point I suppose.

I'm sure there must be another dress you can find that's not £100 - if it is similar to that purple one above then there are an awful lot of dresses like that about. You'll find something - scour ebay, amazon, etc if you have to. Failing that, is there anyone she could borrow something from?

With respect to the dress, if you flash what you're looking for I bet folks on here will be pleased to help find something reasonably priced. All my BMs' dresses were significantly under £100, generally ranging in the £35-40 mark. You can get really nice dresses for not too much. But, as far as the cost, I'd be of the opinion that your sister needs to chip in. I don't know what her financial situation is, but IMO, ultimately it's her responsibility that she became pregnant. I'm having a similar situation with one of my BMs where she insisted on purchasing a smaller size and swore she'd lose the weight. There's a month now until the wedding and she won't even let me see the dress on her (because I think it won't zip up), and she doesn't seem to be getting any smaller.

I can't ask her for money, her partner was put out of work a few weeks before baby arrived and she had money issues before she got pregnant.

I've found a picture of the dress online, it fitted her just perfectly when we bought it

https://thebudgetsavvybride.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/debspurpledress3.png

it's the top one! I just don't know how much she's gonna lose and because it's only her stomach if I got a bigger size it'd be massive at the top and look daft. Although I suppose I could ask a seamstress at the bridal shop to take it in then... Thanks for the replies ladies

You didn't sound that selfish until this paragraph. You have a beautiful new baby in the family, your sister is coping with being a new Mum and all you can do is say 'Why should I buy another dress for her?', because she didn't meet your deadline for losing weight.

The dress doesn't fit so you just need to deal with that. You are lucky - you only have one BM to re-dress; it would be worse if she were one of a group, where an odd dress would stick out. Sell what you have and take her shopping, she might appreciate a but of fun!

I know, it's a little bit of me stamping my foot because my plans have been changed due to something out of my control. I'm a slight control freak ?

You expected her to lose all her baby weight in 8 weeks? A bit harsh and unrealistic don't you think?

You only have one bridesmaid to find a dress for - you can easily do this for less than £50.

To be honest, you should have thought about this when she first got pregnant and returned her other dress with a view to buying a new one after the baby was born.

Can you return the dress to Debenhams? They might give you vouchers that you can spend on a new dress.

Does your sister still want to be bridesmaid? I only ask because if she has always been a slim Jim, and now has a tummy she feels conscious of, she may prefer to wear a flattering dress rather than pour herself into a dress and be in all the photos.

Either way I think you should focus on buying her a new dress she feels gorgeous in.

She will only have a 12 week old baby too remember, so rushing to meet the bride's needs won't be her priority. She may also be knackered and the baby may be uncooperative on the day. So I wouldn't rely on her much as she will put baby's needs first not your wedding.

Is she breast feeding? If so that should be considered when deciding what she should wear. Babies at 12 weeks may still be feeding every couple of hours with lots of cluster feeling in the evening. If she is why not but her a lovely pashmina to use as a modesty cover up when feeding? That's a very thoughtful gift.

Also remember bridesmaids dresses don't need to be bridesmaidy. A nice summer dress can look just as nice. I'll have a look for some inexpensive, purple alternatives.

Something like this:

http://item.mobileweb.ebay.co.uk/viewitem?itemId=110881747297&cmd=VIDESC

I have this *** dress in black and one in cream. They are lovely! And we're £60 ish when in the shops. They tie at the sides or back to nip the waist and are lovely and floaty cotton so won't cling to her tummy. For £10 you can't go wrong!

I had no idea how long was normal to lose baby weight, but everyone said because she's so young and naturally slim, it'd be no time at all, but I guess it's just totally random! She didn't really gain much except on her tummy, and she's not breast feeding but baby's eating every two hours, think they're putting her on hungry baby formula!

I totally understand the baby comes first, I was just having a slight panic, you have all made me feel better though so thank you

yeah, this is lovely, think I'll look for more maxi-type dresses that she'll feel more comfortable in. I have to go and get ready for my hen now, but thanks again everyone

I appreciate your stressed over this , but I do think your being a bit selfish, I'm sure your sister would love to be back to her pre-baby weight but TBH most people aren't back to their pre-baby weight in just 2 weeks ! I'm sure you've done nothing for your sister's self confidence either. She might still get into it yet so give her a break, cadbury purple is a popular colour so I'm sure if the worst comes to the worst and she needs a new dress you'll have no problem finding one.

If it's just her tummy that won't fit, is it worth trying something like spanx with the current dress first? You could take the dress shopping and check if it'll work before buying too.

This!! I had a baby 17 weeks ago and still don't fit in everything.

Just a word of warning...spax might not be suitable this close to post pregnancy (TMI but the bleeding may not have stopped) and they are not easy to get in and out of. Sorry for tmi.

It is unlikely that the dress will fit in that timescale and as many have said there really are loads of options that won't cost the earth. The key thing here is, don't make her feel bad about it in any way cause she really will be on an emotional rollercoaster. Hope you get it sorted ?

Wow, your poor Sister must be feeling great about this. I had a baby 16 weeks ago and I am no where near my pre baby weight.

I know it's hard to see now but your Sister doesn't need to match your colour scheme etc, in fact, when your wedding comes around you'll realise that this really isn't a bit deal and she could have turned up in anything and your day would still be great.

That dress that leeds bride posted would suit perfectly.

On a side note, I think it's lovely that your Sister still wants to be a bridesmaid. She might be feeling a bit self conscious right now x

Blimey - never even thought of that. Spot the childless one!