help with wedding hair please

Hi lynzi30, surely it's your day and you should get what you dream of?! Your sister should understand this and accept the you either have the same style or she comes up with something else. I can't believe that she has said that she wont come if you don't change your style ?

Thank you thats what i was thinking but she really wont budge infact she's now refusing to speak to me and wont answer the phone its actually quite upsetting that she can be so childish about this this is probably the 3rd time she has refused to come to my wedding over childish issues we usually sort it out but with it being so close to the wedding im a bit worried hence me changing my style which i really dont want to do

Have to say Lynzi that I agree - you shoud keep the style YOU want! Its your day and you should be feeling fab so you keep the hairstyle!

I fully expect my little sister to cause more and more trouble about stuff as it gets nearer to my day - but I have decided Im not going to stand for it! I could imagine her doing the same sort of thing and making a fuss about wanting a more elaborate hair do (havent told her yet that I want something very plain for the BMs!)Think that I will just explain that this is my one day to be selfish and have what I want! If she doesnt agree then she doesnt have to be part of it.

Maybe I am just living my sister issues through you! ? ! But I do think its a little mean to try and take away the spotlight from you.

Hiya Linzi,

Many congrats on your special day!

I totally agree with the girls above....its your special day hun, and the style you have mentioned does sounds definately more like a bridal style. Usually, bridesmaids have a little more simple styles to not upstage the bride in any way (ie for example, if the bride has her hair up, usually the bridesmaids have half-up half-down styles to look a little different from her), and usually most bridesmaids are very considerate about this. Do expalin to her more about how important this is to you on your special day Linzi, and hopefully she will understand and realise before the big day...

all the best

take care, xx

what about a compromise of all having it in that style? yours could be made a wee bit bigger mind...are you having a tiara?? or yours all up...but the same idea of a style.

I have to say i agree with the others. If anyone told me they were not coming to my wedding because i was going to have the same hairstyle as me i would thank them for saving me the cost of their food and say good bye. Not a chance i would be blackmailed (as that is what she is doing) on any part of my day. Having said that she is your sister and so i know that you will want her there, but i would also suggest that as your sister she should want to be there no matter what. It is a very difficult position to be in.

Thank you i know ur all right she is just really stressing me out she seems to try to dictate to me over everything in my wedding first of all it was the wedding dress i chose she said if i got it she would not come cos she wanted the dress (bearing in mind she is already married and had a completely different dress) then there was the guest list saying if certain people were coming she wouldn't and now this im sure she's trying to make me grey you wouldn't think she was the older sister!!! there rant over she just doesn't seem to be budging on this one.

you're all right and i want to feel special and not upstaged by the bridesmaid its my day and she's already had hers and i never once said i wouldn't come to hers even though sh put me in a hideous bridesmaid dress dont know how to work this one out

xxx

I'd call her bluff and tell her that you will be wearing your hair in that style whether she likes it or not. i'd tell her she can come or not come, it's her decision, but i'd make it clear that you wont be backing down, its your day and thats that! Just say your piece and tell her you wont talk about it again. good luck x

I totally understand where you're coming from. My older married sister is refusing to go bridesmaid dress shopping until we have agreed how her hair will be on the day! I too am having my hair like yours and my sister has demanded her's be an elaborate up do or the same as mine! I half wish I hadn't asked her to be a bridesmaid as it's stressing both me and my Mum out. Have you tried asking your parents to have a word with her? I tried that and then gave in to reminding her exactly what I did for her wedding (gave up my life for 2 months to do wedding stuff with her every weekend non stop and travel each weekend by train over 3 hours to where she lives) - I found this was the way to get to her. She's still very demanding but every time she starts I just remind her it's my day and she's had hers - I didn't even try a dress on she just told me what I was wearing and how my hair was going to be (incidentally I hated how my hair was and the dress wasn't to my taste either)

Yes i'm wearing a tiara i tried compromising with her but all i got was complete abuse i dont really want my hair all up as it doesnt really suit me so im a bit stuck

Well ive told her its her choice and if she chooses not to come over something as childish as a hairstyle then so be it. the worst thing is she's refusing to let my nieces and nephew come which she knows will get to me as they are a huge part of my life. my parents have been on the phone asking me to change my hairstyle to make her happy and keep the peace as they say if she doesnt attend it puts them in an awkward position dont know whether im just really annoyed over that but it seems whatever she wants she gets and im actually getting more mad than upset

you all make very good points i feel like putting my foot down and telling her where to go!

Not helpfull but i would be fuming!?