I need honest and brutal advice UPDATE

Honest and brutal? Send her back and leave it a while, do some research and perhaps look at a different breed

Ok being totally honest... I'm obviously no expert but I don't think she's the breed for you. As beautiful as she is, huskies are just too much hard work for two people who have busy, full time jobs. As hard as it is, I would take her back whilst the breeder will still have her and do a lot of research into another breed and also whether a puppy is best it maybe a younger dog, but not quite a new pup.

Whatever you decide, you are not a failure. Aurora would be howling like this whoever she is homed with when she is left alone. And let's face it, she has to be left alone at some point. Maybe she'd be better off with a companion, which I know you've said is not an option.

I'm answering as a non-pet person but as a fellow Hitcher who knows you in this little bubble of ours.

If the breeder will take her back, then let her go sweetheart. You're not able to give her what she needs, and it's nothing to do with being a failure. It's about your lifestyle and what you need and don't need in your life right now. Be kind to yourself. I'm sure your dog days will arrive but now it's not the right time ?

She should go back.

You should concentrate on you.

Hi OB, My parents have an alsatian huskey cross, and they are VERY high matainence dogs - need constant exercise and stimulation etc. Ours is at least a little bit of something else, but Husky's are reknown for being difficult dogs to raise. They are pack animals and you need to be the dominant one at all times. They shouldn't really be kept on their own, but there are that many horror stories of "packs" turning on their owners etc. They would not make a good pet if you have small children. And they are not loyal dogs either apparently (this is only what i've picked up from my mum and dad)

My honest advice would be to return her and get a different, familiy friendly breed. As beautiful as they are, they are, my parents would not have had the one they have through choice, she just kind of ended up living with my parents through my younger sister.

You should take her back lovely, while the breeder will still have her and while she is young enough to be rehomed with little stress. You are absolutely not a failure, she is gorgeous but far too high maintenance for two full time working adults. Maybe look at another breed or an older dog if you still want one, but sad as it is Aurora is not the pup for you ? I know how tough this decision must be for you.

Agree with what others have said, Huskys are very hard work, there will be other dogs that will fit in with your life much more easily,

If you send her back you should in NO WAY feel a failure, you will have made a very tough decision, that you have made selflessly in order to give her a better life,

Hope you get things sorted, I can imagine it is very hard for you x

I feel like such a witch.

I've cried all afternoon, and she's not daft she knows something is up.

I hate people who have dogs and send them back. It's so irresponsible. How can I be one of those people. I did my research. I knew they howled. I knew they needed lots of exercise. That was fine. It's not a howl. She screams. Every time I'm out of her sight she screams for me and will not stop. How can anyone live like that? She needs to be with someone who doesn't work, and who is happy for her to go all over the house. Is it that unreasonable to want a downstairs dog?!

The truth is pet ownership needs to work with for both owner and pet, if you keep her you could have another 15+ years of living with a husky. By letting her go now you can hopefully make sure that she ends up in a home that is more suitable to her needs. To be fair I am surprised the breeder agreed to let you have her knowing that you both work full time.

Let her go, give yourself time to grieve her and then do lots and lots of research into a pet that is more suitable for your life now and what you think your future entails.

Sorry not to be more positive.

Don't feel a failure. We fostered a Westie ( 3rd one in our lives) and he had to go back. It's just one of those things about what is best for you, but also what is best for the dog. Why should you all be unhappy? It would be more cruel to keep her than give her back xx

I agree with the others lovely, I'd send her back x

OB you are not failing her and you are not irresponsible. In fact you are doing the very best for her by making sure she goes to a family to can handle her demanding personality.

Massive hugs sweetheart.

Puppies can be very hard work regardless of the breed. It takes a lot of work , patience , time and experience. I don't know what your work situation is, full time I guess which can make it even more difficult. All the issues you've mentioned can be sorted but you need to be in the right place for this.

If I am honest, It sounds like you are not really in the right place right now for a pup. You need to concentrate on you first.

It's not irresponsible to send her back it would be far better to let the breeders take her back and find a suitable home than put you and her through further upset.

.

One of my friends runs a huskie rescue- I can send you a link of Facebook. They may have some help or tips etc?

Oh OB you must feel so torn. In all honesty I think she's a breed that needs alot of attention and exercise, ideally a companion. If you both work I think for her sake I'd give her back and the chance for someone to hopefully give her the type if attention her breed needs. You're not a failure my love. Dogs are bloody hard work at the best of times. And at the end if the day the very fact you're considering returning her is really quite selfless- you're putting her needs first x

I agree with everyone else, I think the kindest thing for her would be for her to go back to her breeder and be rehomed with someone who can handle her.

You haven't failed her, you'd be doing the best thing for her and everyone.

Husky's are very difficult dogs - they need firm training and handling, and a lot of time invested in their training.

? Because I know how hard it is to give up a dog.

Honest and brutal? I was amazed to see that you had got a husky. We looked into getting one years ago and visited lots of breeders and their bounciness and nosiness were things that put us off. Alos the fact that they need company. We ended up getting a malamute and other than him getting ill was a superb fit. He spent months screaming on a night and it was worse than a newborn gettign him not to scream on a night. However we were prepared for that and had gone round all our neighbours to warn them, much to their bemusement.

It's not irresponsible. Irresponsible would be keeping a dog which you aren't able to look after in the way they need. You have a job, you have other animals in the house, you can't have her following you all day everywhere (frankly, even if you were at home all day, this would drive me nuts!) She is beautiful, but if she's making you cry and she's only been with you a few days, something is really not right. Don't be ashamed to admit that she's not right for you, take her back and think about something lower maintenance.

I'm not a dog person at all - we will never have one in any house of mine - so I have no ideas about alternative breeds, but it's clear that it's not fair on you or her to carry on like this.

I work FT but I'm actually only out 3 of 5 days, and one of those days is usually only 3-4 hours. I thought this would be ok. I knew about their tendencies and that it would be tough to train her, and none of that bothers me. It's this sound she makes. I can't ignore it, but I can't be with her 24/7. It makes me feel physically sick. It's awful. And I can't stop her. I've been told it may get better, but it will take months, if at all. She may always howl when alone and i'd be best to get her a companion, which is impossible. Im probably being pathetic and I probably could train her eventually, but I think me and everyone else knows I'm not really in the best place to have to be so strong minded and ignore her constant screams and just carry on. The whole point of getting a dog was to help build me up.

I'm so embarassed and ashamed of myself.

It is a hard decision but one that is best for the dog. You are not a failure, you are being responsible and doing the best for this animal.

Don't be embarrassed ,it sounds like a nightmare. Send her back so she can be re-homed. I could not cope with all that crying either.

Your definately not a failure for recognising that you are struggling. It's a good thing really. a smaller breed would probably suit you better if you are still looking at getting another dog.

A failure when it comes to pets, is someone who doesn't know when it's time to look for help and winds up neglecting the pet and it suffers as a result.

Completely seperately, and because i know you have bunnies already, have you thought of a continental or flemmish giant? they are amazing as pets, and can be very dog like in nature (without the barking) I have 2 and they are fab. especially with your work pattern and having the time to dedicate to training them, they would be ideal for you. - just a thought.

I spoke to him earlier and he said as far as he is concerned there doesn't need to be a discussion, he's never there and I can't cope so she should go back. He said if we ever have another dog he is not being involved in the choice of breed (he wanted a husky) and he feels like it's his fault. He sounded really cross but when I asked him if he was cross with me he said no it was at the situation.

He did say he doesn't really understand why it distresses me so much, but nobody would unless they were here with me. My friend came over and was really shocked at how horrid the whole thing was. It's wearing me down.

You're all being so kind, bet you're thinking inside that I'm a stupid cow. I know I am.

I think she will be going back I don't want another dog, this is not a willy nilly decision for me and never was originally.

To be brutally honest, all puppies are this much work, and if you can't handle it right now perhaps you shouldn't get a dog period. If you're not totally prepared for the amount of work that goes into raising and owning a dog you really should not get one, and there's nothing wrong with that - plenty of peopel couldn't handle it! It's like the whole 'a puppy isn't just for Christmas' thing - too many people get dogs for bad reasons, and to poor creatures end up in shelters, abandoned, or re-homed. When you get a puppy you become her pack. When shegets taken form her family she comes into your home, and very quickly you become her new pack. Sure, if you rehome her asap she'll get over that trauma quickly, but it's still something that will effect her.

I know there are lots of people who are saying get a different breed of dog, but EVERY puppy is like this. Whether it lasts as long or not is irrelevant. You will always be faced with a long period of not being able to leave the puppy alone, constant weeing in the house, howling when left alone, etc. And Wispa's howl was like a scream, too. It's not just huskies. We didn't go out for dinner or to the cinema, or ANYWHERE without her until she was over 6 months old. We just couldn't leave her alone, it's like having an infant. My advice is to send her back so she can go to someone who can handle her, but I wouldn't go about getting another puppy until you're able to commit to it. You sound like you've come to that conclusion now, anyways, which is good.

Anthony and I both work full time, and labradoodles similarly require a lot of training and they are very pack-oriented and need to be with people or other animals. We knew this, so I took time off work for several weeks when we first got her, then worked half days for another 6 weeks and we got a dog walker who takes Wispa out for most of the day. These days I take Wispa to work with me 1 day a week and we pay for the dog walker the other 4. It's an expense, but she is more than worth it. There isn't a puppy in the world who can be left all day when owners work fulltime without a dogwalker or doggie daycare. It's another thing to consider if you ever decide to get another dog.

I don't think bad of you at all, there are many people out there who should have made he decision but didn't and now the animal get neglected. It is the responsible decision and the best outcome for you and for the puppy. She is still young enough to attach to someone else. Husky are pack animals and working dogs. We know someone who has three, and runs them as a pack every weekend on a scooter, like pulling a sledge. It takes commitment and dedication that most people don't have, I know I couldn't handle the attention they need! Good luck to you. Maybe of you do decide to have another dog one day, look into a rescue, already out of its puppy years.

Ok. You know I love you so this is why I'm going to be honest.

Send her back. You're not a failure. You're doing the best thing for her if you can't cope.

I don't entirely agree with Venart about all puppies being this hard work - they don't all scream the place down but yes, they are all difficult to begin with.

I must admit, I was shocked when you got a husky - they're a notoriously difficult breed.

I don't agree that you shouldn't have a dog but I really do think you should consider rehoming a retired greyhound? Lots of the girls on here will testify to how low maintenance they are and you would be doing something lovely in rehoming one.

In summary, I don't think the decision to get a dog was the wrong one. I think the type of dog you decided to get wasn't suitable.

p.s. I'm so so sorry xxx

ETA: I'm not sure how that would fit with the rabbits though.

Venart I disagree that all puppies are like this. I remember our family dog coming into our home and it was nothing like this. Yes ok all puppies cry and howl at night for a while, I fully expected that, but not all puppies won't even let you nip to the loo without screaming blue murder.

I haven't left her at all until today. I haven't moved out of one room virtually except for bedtime. I've tried my best. My best is not good enough for this dog.

I would not go off to work all day without someone coming to see the puppy. My whole family were prepared for the puppy rota.

Plenty people successfully integrate a puppy into their lives without taking weeks off work.

My lovely, you aren't a witch. If you were you wouldn't be feeding & watering & loving her as you clearly do.

I have no experience with puppies/dogs but wonder if leaving a radio &/or lamp on at night might help her settle?

To be honest I think the breeder is at fault - if they are hard work as a breed then they shouldn't really have let you take her without knowing you have the experience.

I think the kindest thing would be to admit defeat & let her go back to the breeder. I too am astonished that the breeder would let a husky pup go to someone with no experience & who works as much as you do. Can I ask if this is a reputable breeder? Did they come out & do a home check with you before you took Aurora? If not, I would consider contacting a local husky rescue & asking for some advice. I would hate to think of her being rehomed with another family who couldn't care for her properly but didn't have your sense to admit it.

So-called "backyard breeders" are a real menace to dog welfare ☹️

OB - I'm so sorry that Auroura isn't the right dog for you. It sounds like a lot of this is down to the breed, this can really determine the character and behaviour of a dog. It also sounds, as was pointed out, that she is an anxious dog. This would be best dealt with by an experienced dog owner who has the time and tenacity to train her.

There is a dog out there that will suit your situation. With your family on side to walk and entertain the dog whilst you're at work, I don't see any problems. Sometimes bigger dogs can require less exercise, like an Irish Wolfhound, but most do require longer and more frequent walks than small dogs. Spaniel's and terrier's wouldn't be a good idea either.

Investigate your local rescue centres as they will have great advice. If you haven't already, buy a book that describes all dog breeds. Use this to narrow down appropriate breeds.

OH was given a dog for his 21st. Despite the family being told he needed two 45 mins walk a day which OH couldn't manage due to his health. The dog is very vocal and needy as he just hasn't every been walked enough.

Let the dog go back to the breeder. You haven't failed her, yourself or anyone on Hitched. So you got it wrong...we all get stuff wrong. My parents bought their third labrador, a puppy, when their lives had changed quite a bit. They realised the next day that they didn't have the patience or could provide the right home for it. They took it back to the breeder and that was the right thing to do.

Huskies are difficult breeds, you have to remember they are working dogs. I don't think you are being irresponsible at all. It's more responsible to do this just now.

I understand that you are getting upset, I honestly would be too, and the constantly following you everywhere wouldn't be good either!

If you do want to keep her have you thought about behavioural classes?

You are not a failure, if you've never had a dog before, a husky really isn't the place to start.

Concentrate on yourself just now.

Remember as well, dogs take their lead from you. If you're not ready to be the strong alpha, she's not going to behave.

Yes, people who have others around who can help, which unfortunately isn't me. There isn't a single person I have in this country who would look after Wispa, sadly. Ant's family aren't dog people, but I knew that, which is why I did what I did.