Tears have started!

Deep breaths, glass of wine ( maybe a bottle) and a hug from ur OH? I am sure it is just pressure and stress! It is going to be fine.

Wow, you are being very over dramatic.

Write them yourself...

This is a stressor of something else that's bothering you. Its normally better to root out WHY you feel low than just reacting. Just relax (thou easier said than done)

Deep breaths and relax.

Unfortunately, the key to not getting stressed with your wedding is remembering It's your day, so no one cares about it quite as much as you and your OH do. Yes, I realise at first that sounds horrible, and even though it's not meant to... it's essentially true. Little jobs like invitation writing are going to be nowhere near as important to your BMs as they are to you.

It doesn't make you a bridezilla, it's probably just the pressure of it all.

Relax.

Think about this for a second...getting married is basicaly project managing a £10000 or so party with some legal extras. People get PAID to do this kind of thing, and we do it as (essentially) a second job. It's stressful, it's hard, but by GOD it's worth it.

Take these ladies advice - grab a bottle of wine, look back on all you've achieved so far, pat yourself on a back for an evening, and give yourself a break. When it gets this stressful at work you take a few days off, right? Take some time for you as and when you can. Get the OH to give you a great big hug and maybe you two can write them together?

I think you know you're over-reacting but in the moment that doesn't really make it any easier!

You're under pressure and feel a bit let down, I'm guessing that you'd planned to have them over and have a nice evening together while doing the invites, so there's probably a bit of disapointment that it won't be as much fun - all together it's quite normal to feel a bit sad.

I'm normally pretty organised and seen as strong, capable and good at getting things done but there's been a fair few times when stress, tiredness, disappointment and maybe a dash of hormones have combined to make me dissolve into a puddle of tears!! I just have to pick myself up, dust myself off (metaphorically or literally if I have actually been sitting on the kitchen floor!!) and carry on.

You'll probably have a few more of these moments in the coming weeks but, like all the brides before you, you'll get through them and have a lovely day ?

I don't think your BM's would have realised how important this is to you, so I'd urge you not to be upset with them

maybe just take the night off and have some fun with OH - the invites can wait another day

or, do them later, after a glass of wine and a relax....

Blimey. I found writing the invitations to be the easy bit. Getting people to reply to them is the toughie here.

I'm so mean but I really don't get why people think wedding planning is stressful or hard??? I'm loving every second of it!!! I'm juggling a distance learning diploma with my full time job at the min and wedding planning is a sweet relief in comparison!

Like another poster said, remember your wedding is only a big deal to you! And get your hubby to be to help you with the invites, it's his day too!

How far into the planning are you out of interest?

We've been engaged 4 weeks, getting married Feb 22nd. So far we've booked the venue, food and drink, registrar. We've provisionally booked the band and got a meeting with a potential photographer on Tuesday. I've decided on the colour scheme and got quotes for all the bitty things like chair covers, invite printing (designing myself and getting a friend to do the artwork) etc, and chosen our centrepieces and flowers! So quite far considering it's ages away lol.

Should I expect to feel stressed nearer the time?!

Without a doubt. So far you have had none of the family politics yet, dress disasters, pregnant bm's or anything else!

Agreed. I have planned 3 weddings (4 including my Mums) and never found it stressful at all. But then, I didn't find it fun either. Wedding planning bores me, but it definitely wasn't stressful.

I don't think those things count as 'wedding planning'?! I can see your point though, some people may have stressful family situations...but I stand by the planning side of things not being stressful :p !

It all ends up part of wedding planning.... In my case family politics means my sister refused to do a reading so had to decide on somebody else, I have no idea where to seat my family during the ceremony without somebody being murdered, same situation for the dinner seating plan and don't even get my started on the photograph list.

These things may not be on the ticklist you get in every wedding magazine but they are the ones that cause most issues for ticking those boxes!!

Take a step back. I am utterly calm most days about my wedding. I am even not losing sleep nor on the phone every hour over a non exisistent wedding dress. It will all be OK. But, I still surprised myself by suddenly finding tears when I texted a friend back, she asked about did we need to invite my mum to some wedding planning stage. And, honestly she's not fussed. But suddenly out of nowhere tears for the disintersted mother. Madness! It's not her day after all!

Take it as your moment of madness, relax and give yourself a night off x

Bless you- how cute.

In fairness the times I have got stressed have been more down to feeling overwhelmed by the enormity of it all rather than the stress of the actual tasks that need doing. I am a little stressed right now as our house is up for sale and if any of the recent batch of people offer and we accept then the move will be timed with the wedding/ honeymoon and we don't have a house to move into yet. It's school report writing time, and my step kids will be over from July so won't want to spend the weekends on wedding stuff. I also have been planning to DIY a fair bit and this is an added thing to do. The stress of wedding planning is all relative, I hope that those of you who are stress free remain that way, but don't get too smug about it ;-) pride comes before a huge bridezilla paddy because ur OH is watching Man U instead of picking out placecards!

I had a good hour of crying like a baby then picked myself up made the kids their dinner cleaned the house from top to bottom and I think I am slightly more rational.

I have been quite happily planning the wedding by myself as my OH has just started up his own business and I would rather he concentrated on that becoming more established at the moment. I think it wasn't the task of writing the invite it was just the realisation that the wedding is in 6 weeks and I still have a lot of bitty tasks and if anyone is missing from the guest list it's my fault (OH has told me who he would like) . I am also turning 30 on Monday and for some reason this has unsettled me. Anyway my BMs are brill and I would never blame them I know what it is like I've been a BM for all of them

Thank you all for your helpful advice I am sitting with a large glass of wine as I reply. Feeling a little silly but a whole lot better after a good cry! Thanks ladies I hope I can return the favor if any of you have a mini meltdown. Have to add I would never cancel the wedding it took him 9 years to ask the first time ?

Did you mean to be so patronising Mini?

I am after all planning a wedding just like all other brides, not everyone's experience is the same, erego, not everyone will find it stressful.

Missmac, I'm glad you're feeling calmer :o)

Patronising-no! Speaking from experience-yes! Try not to read into things,I always thing it's hard to get the tone in a forum.

I hope your planning journey is fabulous and smooth. By the sounds of it four weeks in all is dreamy, from experience on hitched ladies all seen to have a wobble or too (myself included)

hopefully to will still be on hitched close to your wedding day- you need to report back and let us know how you are getting on!

It's easy for you to say that because everything has been straight forward for you... Wait till things start going tits up then you will understand stress.

For instance try calling your chosen church to finalise booking only to being told... "Actually we have scheduled building work starting soon and the building will be closed for 12months we are moving to a rented hall" No big deal right?

so you chose another church that you spend a week trying to speak to anyone only to eventually get through to someone who can help to be told "well yeah we can do the 8th June next year, however we do have planned building works which should be finished by then IF we start on time"

Again No big deal right? This is so not worthy of stress.

very happy that you've had a stress free experience so far but please don't belittle the fact that not everyone is so lucky.

im bloody hating the whole thing at the moment and yes I'm very overwhelmed with stress (while trying not to let it get to me)

This ?

I thought for a minute there the curse of mini had struck again but it seems to have simmered down ( :-) I jest, I jest)

glad you're feeling calmed now, I definitely had the odd meltdown- including yesterday when people want too look round our house Monday and I have half made DIY projects everywhere. Shoved them in the wardrobe now but I had a little paddy first if that makes you feel better?

Yes you want to be jesting!

(said in a Grant Mitchell style double 'ard voice)

I think my first four weeks of wedding planning were in a huge champagne fug so I am not sure anything would have stressed me out. It was later when my sister refused to come, or my Bridesmaid got very ill and diddnt think she could make it, or MrMini decided he diddnt want to do a first dance actually, or my Sister refused to come if I diddnt invite her hideous boyfriend, or MrMinis Grandmother had a fall and couldnt attend, or the venue lost our booking and note that we had paid a deposit, or I had a disastrous make up trial, or we forgot to take the presents for the parents to the venue on the day...

Im pretty chilled out and I found all of the above wedding planning stressful.

I'm with u mini on this ( I'd be scared not too!)

I was reading this and thinking "I dont remember having a wobble" Then I remembered throwing an invitation at the front door in a moment of chaotic madness as I was trying to make 3 invites (after making a load) but had everything strew across the lounge floor, OH was not helping and I was doing the invites for the people he forgot in the first place.

Then again things like that get to me easily and it isnt unusual for me to throw something.

In the grand scheme of things having to write the invites by yourself isnt a big deal but it can be the kind of thing that tips you over the edge if you are tired, grumpy or sick of the sodding things!

Wedding stress = normality !

I also wondered what everyone whinged about tbh! I say I had a peaceful run till 8 weeks in!

Then everyone in the family suddenly develops an opinion!!!!

On dates , times , venue even god damn colour!

I even came off hitched for a while because everything weddingy began to Piss me off!

That was weird for me considering iv spent the past 3 years thinking about weddings , talking about weddings ! But then I got engaged at Xmas and the planning became reality ! Lol x

This reply is not really related to the tears but im pleased im not only one who havent sent evening invites to guests yet with 6 weeks to go!

H found one of our evening invites in his car yesterday, unposted from last May. I have no idea how the couple actually managed to end up at our reception!

OP meltdowns will happen at stressful times, and things you find stressful wouldn't phase someone else and vice versa. I think I wobbled over everything as the wedding grew closer.