The stress is getting a bit much :(

Is there anything (or things) in particular that are stressing you out?

Big hug x x x x x x

For some reason part of my message was missing... Basically, I am feeling a huge amount of pressure to get everything perfect. The pressure is coming from me, 100%, I am a perfectionist. I know the official stuff is all that matters and as long as OH and I are there to say 'I Do' then the rest isn't that important but I just cannot stop worrying about everything. I have this idea that everything to do with my outfit has to be perfect. I want to look my best ever but it's making me question everything. I have had wobbles about my dress, my shoes, my hair and make up and yesterday it was my earrings which arrived. I'm now fretting that they are too cheap looking and I don't like the cheap noise they make when I move my head! Someone tell me this is getting ridiculous! I explained this to OH last night and of course he reassured me that I will look beautiful but I just feel constantly worried.I've even moved on the BMs now regretting my choice of BM and FG dresses. It doesn't help that we still have loads more to sort out/pay for so I've got the financial stress too.

I was feeling like this last night and the night before last, I feel totally overwhelmed about everything at the moment - shyness on the day, all the guests, timings, making sure everyone is happy, the enormous lists I have made for the 3 days running up to the wedding that I can't do anything about until I'm there aaarrrgh! It doesn't help that the OH and I have been bickering at each other all week and I feel like if we're like this now what's it going to be like in years to come?!

Anyway I'm trying to chill now and just think that it will all get sorted and we will have help nearer the time...try and enjoy it for now ?

Of course you're not the only one! I've had a few 'breakdowns' over the last several weeks as the big day gets closer. My poor OH has had to bear the brunt of it, poor thing. He's been great though at calming me down and trying to help out where he can.

Chin up HLT and vent on here when you need to! ?

I've seen your outfit and you will look stunning, it all goes together really well.

I remember feeling like this at the 3month or so mark - I was so worried that it wouldnt be perfect for me and that noone would enjoy it. I thought the feeling would never pass and that I would have a rubbish wedding - but now, with 10days to go all I am is so flipping excited. ?

It gets better I promise.

It is a lot of pressure when you are trying to organise your big day, but don't forget why you chose things like your dress and accessories. I have been stressing too and all my OM friends have been very reassuring as they have been there before so have done the worry part and afterwards realised it was all for nothing.

Please don't let it get too much for yu, you know we are always here to listen. You need to try and enjoy the planning

Oh hun I no how u feel Iv got 6 weeks till me wedding day and I feel the same way everything is gettin to me everyone is getting on my nerves if u need anyone to talk too :-)

Don't worry you're definitely not alone, I have felt like this for the last couple of weeks too, and like you I'm a perfectionict so I'm agonising over every last detail! I haven't slept properly in about 2 months and what makes it worse is that it's getting to the point where everyone and their dog wants to stick their ore in and it's driving me insane! I'm trying to relax, but we still have a few big things to organise so I keep telling myself once the big bits are sorted I can start to mellow a bit... will see if that happens!

Thanks for the reassurance. I am getting so frustrated with myself now because I just want to be enjoying all of this and looking forward to it, instead, I just feel panicked by it all and I am dreading putting my outfit on the day and thinking I look a mess/not feeling special. These earrings are really bugging me too as I'm not sure if they really are not right or whether I am picking holes in them for the sake or it; I feel like I'm starting to lose sight of what really is inadequate and what is just me being stuoid. Argh!

Aww no. Maybe it would help to take a wedding break? Go to the pub on the weekend and enjoy the sunshine!!! One weekend won't hurt. I think you can over analyse things when you're too focused. Everything will be fine and on the day things like earrings will not matter a jot. However, to save you from a complete meltdown maybe buy a back pair that dont make a noise? That way if you decide later you really don't like them you have a spare and if it turns out you're just stressed then you have a pair just because? I go through phases where I think everything will be rubbish but I find talking to my gran helps. She is unfailingly upbeat about everything and just reminds me that no matter what goes wrong (she follows this up with "god forbid") it will still be the best day of your life. Which is true no?

I've been ill this week, partly with a stomach bug, but mostly because of wedding related stress. I had a migraine for three days and did nothing but lie on the sofa and whinge at poor D. My manager told me to stay at home all week, I don't think my team (all male in my immediate department) could take the whining and worrying any more.

I get where you're coming from with it all wanting to be perfect, i've had the same worries. But trust me its just your wedding brain messing with you. It will all look fine on the day. Nothing is ever 100% perfect but I doubt you'll even notice if its not perfect on the day.

Everything will get sorted in the end and it will all be fine. Trust me. I am Anxiety Girl ?

I too have been feeling out of sorts this week. I started with a sore throat, the doctor says its an allergy (hay fever type of thing) but I have now developed a very annoying cough!!! On top of a bunged up nose and the headache I haev given myself from coughing too much and lack of sleep I'm just about ready to snap everyones head off! I did wonder if the wedding stress was also palying a part in this tho.

So you are certainly not alone OP. I think we are all guilty of putting ourselves under too much pressure and as people have said it rally doesn't have to be 100% perfect anyway. Thank goodness we can chat on here to people in the same boat who understand.

As an example of how ridiculous things can get I even found myself worrying this morning that if this lovely sunny weather lasts I am going to have a problem if I get any tan marks if they do not match the shape of the top of my dress!!!!!!!! Unfortunately short of going out and buying a job lot of tops in the same style as my wedding dress (if such a thign exists) how on earth do I do anything about this one???

I had this last week when I was finishing of decorating my invites, one of the sickers that I am using looked wobbly so I threw a right tantrum! Its amazing how much the stress can get to you, only one of my friends is married and she was the most chilled out bride ever, (I actuallly ended up being more stressed out than her for her wedding!) so I havent even got that to fall back on, think my MOH is looking forward to when it is all over so we she can tell me something about her life!!

Feeling better having read these replies, although I can't shake my foul mood today, I think it's just a general stress because there is so much going on and we are running out of money - fast!

Remember that things that you think need to be "perfect" no one else is going to notice (unless they're a right pernickity arse). The dress/earrings/shoes etc that you have you bought on instinct because you liked them - that must count for something, right?

As long as you and H2B are there then it's all good! Remember - is there any point stressing so much you make yourself ill over one day? You have the rest of your lives to spend together, and like you say, your H2B will love you and think you look amazing no matter what!!

In saying that, I'm away home to tackle the seating plan. Then I'll be stressing too......

8 weeks to go......

x