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pinkjay
Beginner October 2007

Threw my cheating H Out - barsteward

pinkjay, 26 August, 2008 at 08:21 Posted on Off Topic Posts 0 76

Well no point being anon anymore, I was mescared at the beginning of the year. All the lies he told me that he wanted to come home and make it work well were huge lies. I came home early from work yesterday and found him and his 19yr old bit upstairs in MY home ?

Im sure you can imagine how I felt, sick to my stomach, I threw her out and packed his bags and threw him out too. Going to phone solicitor today to get an appointment to get some advice of where to start.

So they are welcome to each other as apparantly they 'love' each other and I will be free of his lies forever. He only sat on Sun and said he loved me and wanted to start a family in the next few months, thank goodness im not pregnant and I found out now what a scumbag he is.

I need to thank everyone for their support earlier in the year and sorry for being anon then but I have nothing to be ashamed of now and last night the support I had from some hitchers who phoned me and came to my house, well I just can't thank them enough. ?

So no doubt I will be on asking for advice and support through this divorce as I just want rid of him now.

?

76 replies

Latest activity by Allegra, 29 August, 2008 at 11:51
  • strawberry*shortcake
    strawberry*shortcake ·
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    You couldn't have spoke a truer word when you say you have nothing to be ashamed of. You done EVERYTHING you possibly could have to try to make it work. You deserve so much better and you WILL find so much better someone who really appreciates the special person you are.

    Talk to u in a mo ?

    xx

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  • J
    Beginner May 2003
    Janna ·
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    Christ, barsteward indeed.

    Well, at least you know, without any doubt now and catching him red handed gives him no room for wriggling out of it. And like you say, be thankful that there are no kids involved. He clearly doesn't love this girl, but has now had his hand forced and being with her is a nicer prospect than being homeless and alone. I'd give it 6 months tops.

    Good luck with it all, and stay strong.

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  • Purple Pixie
    Beginner July 2012
    Purple Pixie ·
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    Bloody hell, what an absolute git. Well done you though for chucking him straight out.

    Are you ok? Sorry, that's a really silly thing to ask.

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  • pinkjay
    Beginner October 2007
    pinkjay ·
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    She still lives at home and goes to tech (college), gawd its actually quite funny when you think of it.

    Im not as bad as I was when I found out before (christmas) that something was going on, im angry that it was MY home and my friggin bed, going to get a new one today and burn that one me thinks. I am gutted and have cried but for me wasting the last 8months of my life thinking we could get our marriage back on track, not over him, hes worthless to me now.

    she sent me some nasty texts too yesterday so that will look good for her wont it !

    them both

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  • jaz
    Beginner
    jaz ·
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    Awww PJ what an utter c u n t. I can't believe it. I'll dust off my rusty knife and cut his balls off.

    I'm off today if you want me to come up/fancy coming here? Or any time at all - to see the solicitor, go for a coffee or whatever.

    I'm sooooo sorry ☹️

    ETA is it the same girl?

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  • pinkjay
    Beginner October 2007
    pinkjay ·
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    Oh yes the same little teenage girl half his age. Shes welcome to him.

    thanks Jaz, you can join the queue as there is quite a large one developing lol. And he doesnt have any balls as a man wouldn't have done what he did, spineless B.

    Thats kind, if you want to help dump the rest of his stuff in the garden your welcome Smiley winking

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  • A
    Beginner August 2007
    alison76 ·
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    Maybe you should reply to the girl telling her he obviously loves her that much that he was asking you to start a family with him!

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  • DebbieD
    DebbieD ·
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    I'm so sorry to hear that. xxxx

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  • jaz
    Beginner
    jaz ·
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    Bloody hell. I really can't believe it at all. Do his family know what he's been up to/kicked out for? I'm sure they'll be very proud ?

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  • Dr Doo.Little
    Beginner May 2007
    Dr Doo.Little ·
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    Make sure you keep all the texts and everything, I'm sure you can use them as evidence in the divorce (my auntie used photos and cards my uncle and his partner had sent to each other).

    What a shock for you though, you poor thing. Sounds like you are better off rid, but that probably doens't stop it hurting ?

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  • jaz
    Beginner
    jaz ·
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    Oh and keep a record of her texts and his, especially if they contain anything threatening/alluding to their antics as they may be useful down the line.

    Are you on a contract? Have you thought about changing your number? I might have a spare PAYG sim card somewhere if you need it for now?

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  • pinkjay
    Beginner October 2007
    pinkjay ·
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    I just dont want anything to do with either of them, she will soon know what he is like or she will find a younger model as she will get fed up with the sugar daddy. Wouldn't give her the satisifaction of texting, she can find out for herself what a dcikhead he is.

    His family are digusted and angry but at the end of the day blood is thicker than water isn't it.

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  • pinkjay
    Beginner October 2007
    pinkjay ·
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    Aye I have kept her texts from yesterday and funnily enough all the ones she sent back in dec/jan - maybe I just knew I would need them. I don't want to change my number just yet, well just to see but it will be changed soon.

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  • A
    Beginner
    Angel1982 ·
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    What an absolute w@nker ?

    Sounds like you are well rid mate...stay strong ?

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  • pinkjay
    Beginner October 2007
    pinkjay ·
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    Thanks everyone, really appreciate it ?

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  • HaloHoney
    Beginner July 2007
    HaloHoney ·
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    When a husband makes his bit on the side his main concern - all he does is create a vacancy. ?

    Good for you for seeing things as they truly are - walk away with your head held high. You have no reason to be ashamed.

    Let karma do the work for you - it will bite them on the arse at some point. Hopefully rather soon.

    ?

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  • AngelFace123
    Beginner November 2007
    AngelFace123 ·
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    My heart is in my throat for you, I'm so angry. I want to rip his & her head off for you. What a complete Fucker.

    Well done for being so brave, you'll get through this believe me. You know where I am if ya need to talk. xXx

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  • tickle
    Beginner October 2008
    tickle ·
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    Good on you for walking away head held high.

    I would not bother replying to her text messages,it will probably annoy the little girl even more.

    I doubt she will ever trust him,as he cheated on you with him.She will be thinking he will do the same with her.

    ? love to you xx

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  • W
    Beginner January 2012
    weeme ·
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    Grrrr what an absolute tw@t!!

    In my, immature, response I would be tempted to offer him the bed (after infesting it with something nasty!)?

    Seriously - I hope you're doing as good as can be expected.

    Hugs

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  • pinkjay
    Beginner October 2007
    pinkjay ·
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    I so touched by the posts everyone, I really am. ? Im just touched, thank you

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  • V
    Beginner
    veryafraid ·
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    Am so absolutely gutted for you and so angry at your H for this. I have replied to your email. God, it's so wrong for him to have allowed this to drag on for so many months and to have messed with your feelings - getting you to slowly retrust him and invest in the relationship. How very dare he. You know where I am for e-support. Feel so bad for you. You have been amazing to me and I wish things had worked out for you. I know that you will make a life for yourself, and that it will be a great life, as you are strong and have shown yourself to have more strength and maturity than you realised was there before this year. You will be ok honey, I don't know how it feels right now, but you will survive this and you will go on to a happier place than somewhere with a man who won't commit and didn't try hard enough. More fool him if he thinks behaving that way is acceptable.

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  • Eric
    Eric ·
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    Pinkjay I'm devastated for you - I cant even begin to imagine how horrible it was for you to be confronted with that. But a big part of me is also glad that he's made it easier for you to get rid of the cheating fecker.

    You know where I am and, well, anytime pet. Keep strong and stay angry just a little bit longer. Nic, x ?

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  • pinkjay
    Beginner October 2007
    pinkjay ·
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    Thanks veryafraid thats very nice of you. I will check the emails

    eric, thanks so much for last night meant a lot.

    Im heading to docs here so will be back later

    thanks everyone ?

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  • SK Returns
    SK Returns ·
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    I've seen your posts as mescared and you've put up with so much over the past few months but you've always been there to advise and support hitchers going through similar situations. You deserve to be happy, you're a good person (from what I gather on here!) and you have nothing to be ashamed of - you've been more than tolerant. Keep smiling knowing you're the bigger person. Take care.

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  • SophieM
    SophieM ·
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    Poor you, I'm so sorry you are going through this. He sounds like a very weak man.

    Veryafraid, I did receive your email a few weeks back. I'm very sorry I didn't respond - there's no reason other than my own crapness! I'm so pleased to hear things are going better with you.

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  • C
    Beginner June 2005
    Chinatown ·
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    Said it all already to you, but thought Id sent you a virtual hug on here: ?

    And Ive done that thing for you Smiley winking

    xxx

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  • Old Nick Esq.
    Old Nick Esq. ·
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    By Barabara Kingsolver, loosely...

    In every betrayal there comes a perfect moment - A coin stamped heads or tails with salvation on the other side.

    Think you made a good call. ?

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  • jaz
    Beginner
    jaz ·
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    I've just sent you an email back there. Sorry I had to dash out but will be around all day now if you need me ?

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  • pinkjay
    Beginner October 2007
    pinkjay ·
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    Thanks everyone, honestly it means so much getting support. I seen my gp this morning and he has given me some diazepam to help me sleep as I didn't last night. Hes also going to contact the hospital to see if I can start my dmards meds for my arthritis again as that barsteward was stringing me along telling me he wanted a family. fecker. Im flaring up badly at the mo.

    So im going to go and bung all his stuff into black bags and dump them in the garden. Absolutely gauls me to text him to tell him to get it but he better or there will be a bonfire Smiley winking

    Thanks Chinatown for doing that, just didn't want any pics of us on FB or bebo. Jaz thanks, im at home now. Everyone your so kind ?

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  • kierenthecommunity
    Beginner May 2005
    kierenthecommunity ·
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    How awful for you ☹️

    did he do it deliberately or did he not know you were due home?

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  • jaz
    Beginner
    jaz ·
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    Do you want me to take a scoot over to you? I can do whatever you need done with the bags and help you sort them if you want?

    I also do a mean line in chocolate ?

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  • Mal
    Expert January 2018
    Mal ·
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    I'm sorry this happened but you sound like you are coping amazingly. And a big ? to the Hitchers who came over and called you. That is just brilliant!

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