Wedding Dress Shop Disaster!!!!

More shops should be open Sundays!

Certain shops can be pretty snottynosed about taking pictures, I actually found this was lower end shops rather than high end. In order to make a decision about a dress I need to be able to look back on photos of ME in it not just a model. So if you won't let me have pictures then I won't be buying from you!

Not being pushy. I tried on a dress that my mum and the shop assistant loved but it wasn't the one for me. Every dress the shop assistant after that I was told didn't suit my shape or made my hips look fat. After four dresses I was told I couln't try on more despite only being 30 mins into my one hour appointment. She was only interested in the first and most expensive dress I tried on. Also I travelled from Leeds to Plymouth to dress shop so asked if she could measure me for said dress so I could ring and pay the deposit if I wanted it. I was told no! So more flexibility would be good.

Thank you!!!

I don't like pushy assistants either. The shop where I'm getting my dress asked me if I needed any help with browsing, then when I said I didn't they left me to it, until I found a dress I wanted to try on. They made some really helpful suggestions about possible alterations and accessories without forcing it on me, mentioned that it would take 4-6 months for the dress to arrive without saying it in a "YOU MUST BUY THIS DRESS NOW BEFORE YOU RUN OUT OF TIME!" way. Whereas in most other shops I went to the assistants kept hovering asking me if I'd found anything I wanted to try on yet every 30 seconds, and acted shocked and horrified that I hadn't found my dress yet when I said I was getting married in December (I know dresses take 6 months but I have 8 months to go, I don't really understand the problem?)

Another place I went to offered me a £200 discount if I bought the dress that day, I don't think it's right to try and push people in to making a snap decision on such a big purchase. If they can afford to give me a £200 discount they can still afford to give it to me in a week's time! They also said that their alterations package was £150, no matter what alterations you're having, which I thought was a bit ridiculous considering all I would have needed was the hem taken up. Like someone else said, flexibility is good.

I absolutely agree!! This is all extreamly helpful, Thank you all!!! Keep them coming ladies!!!! x

Hi Kylie,

Not sure if you're happy/allowed to say but what shop in Plymouth was this? You can email me direct if you prefer!

Curiosity is just getting the better of me on this one is all because I went dress shopping in Plymouth and wonder if it was one of the shops I tried!

In response to OP

I agree with opening on Sundays and taking photographs.

Stocking more plus sizes dresses...I need to try dresses on to decide what I like so having more than 1 would be helpful!

Hospitality as mentioned, good customer service manner, not pushy, nothing too much trouble, not snotty/stuck up!

Second the plus size dresses I'm an 18 and can't find anything to try on that fits!

So can I ask ladies, would any of you be open to trying second hand gowns, that have been fully cleaned and restored. If you find a style similar to the one you were wanting but obviously cheaper???

I definitely would have. I would have bought a second hand one online but I didn't want to buy anything without having tried it on first.

I think an assistants honesty about which style suits best is good. Knowing a womans body shape & suggesting the right dress shapes to compliment is good (when asked).

I objected to paying £30-£50 for the dress I wanted to try on, to be taken to my local shop.

One bridal boutique told me I couldnt bring in a dress I bought elsewhere & have them alter it. Nor would they let me try my dress on in their shop to buy one of their veils! They'd only let me bring the dress in to match the colour, but not wear it.

I would have tried on 2nd hand dresses if they were available in a shop that also sold new. I ended up buying pre loved anyway.

Have to agree with the larger samples as there is nothing worse than being squeezed into a gown that is too small for you and being told to try and imagine.

I burst into tears and I know a lot of my friends have had a similar experience and for what should be a really exciting experience for you is made horrific.

Laura - where are you based as I found a fab plus sized store in Datchet and the ladies were amazing.

Suz x

The place i have got my dress from was great until i paid my deposit on my dress. At first they couldnt be any nicer then after paying the deposit never phoned any of the times they said they would (i never got THE call to say my dress was there, i called them and got told "yeah, its here ") and stopped replying to my emails. Was told that when my dress was ordered so would my shoes, veil and tiara be ordered. When dress arrived i went in to try and and asked for my veil and tiara, to be told they hadnt been ordered as they didnt have enough space to store everything for everyone! I told them to get them ordered and i would collect them and keep them myself. Went last week for a dress fitting to be told they dont have a customer toilet that we could have used, the woman was rude.

I totally agree with the plus size samples i went to a shop in gravesend and it was a case of the lady bringing me the ones that was big enough for me to try on , which was about 3!! the assistant was lovely up untill i wanted to take the dress out the shop and not return to her for alterations! Another thing i would say is sizing its self , rather than the shop ordering the right size according to the biggest part of your body it should be that you measurements are taken and dress is made to them . im a plus size girl about size 26 , the sample i tried was a size 26 and fit perfectly but the dress i recieved was a 32 and obviously massive on me and cost £500 to alter!

I have to admit I didnt enjoy the dress shopping experience. I had varied experiences and some that nearly brought me to tears.

There were a couple of shops locally to me who couldn't do anymore for me but there were also some who looked me up and down to see if I could afford the dresses they had in the shop!!!

Also shops shouldn't judge those brides who go to in on their own. My mom lives 120 miles from me so some of the shops I went to on my own to see if they had what I was looking for to then make an appointment to go back with my mom. When I did this most shops looked at me as if I try on wedding dresses for a hobby and checking my left hand for an engagement ring. (This shop nearly brought me to tears!!)

Basically I think shops shouldn't judge a book by its cover, I look very young for my age but I will be 2 months away from 30 when I get married and when I tell assistants this their eyes nearly pop out of their heads. But it shouldn't matter if you 18 or 40 its your decision to get married.

I don't like it when they ask what your budget is either. I understand why they ask but to me it is off putting as if to say from the look of you you can't afford it. On the other hand I was looking at the Ian Stuart gowns (to see what the quality was etc) I was told sternly by the assistant that the prices started at £1500 as if she had already stereotyped me into someone who couldn't afford them by looking at me.

One of the good things I found in one shop is that she asked about the venue and church I was getting married in to see if the dress was right for the venue which I found was a good attention to detail.

I have a back condition that caused me a massive problem when finding the right dress a couple of the shops did make quite good suggestions as to how to overcome the fact that I look lop sided. Whereas some shops just stared at me and commenting on my lop sided ness.

I am a high street 12 which in dress sizes seemed to come out at a 14 and I prefered it when shops that these kind of sizes compared to many shops who only seemed to stock size 8-10 gowns. I was able to see how the dress would fit better in more realistic sizes.

Hope this helps.

I second the comment about the sales staff judging you- I cancelled an appointment I ha booked hen he said to me "what is you budget? As our dresses start at £1500" in a really snotty way. I old have won the lottery for all she knew! Anyway, they lost out.

Also, having smaller sizes to try on I'm an 8/10 and the shop had 1 that fitted me, all the others had to have padding and pins put in them, so you can't really get a true indication of the fit.

Apart from that, I really enjoyed it, and I usually hate shopping,

One of the local stores I went to asked looked dirty and dingy, it was freezing cold, no floor space, everything crowded, poor lighting and only one main mirror. The woman what dresses I wanted to try and I pointed them out, she forgot some of them, chucked the others onto the floor or the waiting room and told me to 'get yourself into one and I'll be back in a moment.' She was busy helping another bride who was there to try on and collect her dress, even though we had made an appointment, and so had the bride. I could see the bride looked happy to see her dress, but the hem of it was filthy where the lady had dragged it over to her! My mum had to guess at how to lace me in as the shop woman never came back over and totally blanked us! I left the rest on the floor without bothering to try on as I was so disappointed in her service. Just generally poor attention and a lazy attitude towards the customers and products made it an unpleasant experience.

Thankfully my first experience had been great, so I knew that not all shop assisstants would be like that. It was at a small local shop and the ladies there spent ages letting me try on whatever styles I fancied, offering veils and tiaras to try as well, and giving me constructive advice about ways to enhance my shape without being critical. They offered my mum a place to sit and a drink. I found a great Tolli dress there, but my favourite dress was at a big store in the town centre. Again there was a place for my mum to sit, there was a sort of stage type thing for me to stand on, a lovely long space lined with mirrors everywhere, and a wider space for me to swish about, and mirrors and perfect lighting just where you would need them. There was also a preloved section of prom dresses which was beautifull displayed.

Another shop in town was great but was soooo hot - my mum was nearly passing out and it made it uncomfortable when the lady was dressing me as I felt conscious I might get sweaty on the dresses! She also was having a 'special designer day' (apparently) and made me feel rushed into a decision, going on about discounts for cash deposits and so on, I felt really pressured and always resist making a decision when I get pushed like that.

All in all top things from me would be:

Make customers feel welcome but not pushed. We are potentially spending thousands - don't chase that away being too keen or too cold.

Provide space for brides to 'swish' and walk so they can really feel how the dress moves with their body.

Good mirrors and lighting - not to give a false image but so we can see what we really look best in under hard lights!

Privacy and spacious changing rooms with hooks and stool etc for our own clothes.

Staff who are interested enough to help dress and lace you in and give honest but polite advice.

Space and refreshments for people we bring in with us. We need them to feel relaxed so they give us honest opinions, not just want to rush out.

A range of sizes and make sure they're clean!

A range of prices (could include pre-loved) in distinct areas so no nasty shocks when you find 'the one' and then see the impossible 3k price tag!

A nice temperature would be an added bonus. Not too hot, not too cold.

I went into one shop and was made to feel a bit crap because I couldn't afford much. I have also found it difficult due to my size 14-16 to find nice dresses that fit me even just to try on. In the end I turned to ebay an found a few dresses I loved. In the end though a friend offered me her dress for £150, it had only been worn for a few hours and has a few sparkles missing which my mum will repair. I think it is quite nice that I have a pre-loved gown x

Will pm you!

Will pm you!

I definitely agree. Sunday openings are a must! I had a different problem with size. I never found a dress under a size 12 (most I found were 14 plus, I only found one at a size 12). Yeah ok, they could pin the dresses but you lose the effect/shape and you can't see the back properly when it gets over 2 sizes bigger. Most of the dresses I found we're size 14 and over. Shops could really do with stocking two sizes in each style. A 10-12 and then a 14/16/18 ish. Not practical or cheap to do but it would really help. It was driving me nuts not being able to find a dress closer to my size.

I must admit that the service and help that I have had in my shop, Shropshire Country Brides has been exemplary. I've had problems with my dress too (not the shops fault, the designer) and they have been fab. Sally the manager is amazing, so helpful and understanding.

I must admit the shop that had the best setup was Magic Moments in Abergavenny. They had nice big mirrors, a huge room to yourself where you friends/BMs could chill out on a nice comfy sofa. They had the big circle step thing at the right distance from the mirror to admire the dress. They didn't have any mirrors in the changing room which was a good thing as I found when there was a mirror in the changing room, I had made my mind up whether I liked th dress before it had even been done up! Really well set up shop.

So many shops I went to were cramped and it felt like you were sharing the space with the other brides in the store. Much referred to have our own room. Suzanne James in Cardiff was also setup up very well.

I would have liked to have been offered a complimentary glass or bottle of water, as it was so hot in some of the shops and I got so parched.

I was gutted that no one offered me champagne or sparkling wine!

I must admit I am surprised that some shops are in business. Sme assistants hated it when I walked out and just knew it wasn't the right dres. Very unhelpful indeed!

Thanks for that Kylie, curiosity was getting the better of me!

So funny though as as it turns out that's the shop I bought my dress from and found them lovely in there! Nothing was too much trouble...I wonder if we had the same lady!

I had a pretty good experience overall dress shopping, it would have been made even better with Sunday opening times as my MOH was unable to come dress shopping except Sundays or late evenings currently. We would have loved to have done that together, had their been opening times on a Sunday at a near by Bridal shop we would have definitely done it!

I think most points have been touched upon.

Sunday opening would be good, or even late opening.

hving toilets and refreshments readily available - i was very disappointed not to get a glas of bubbly, as anytime you see it on TV they always do!!

be more welcoming to walk-ins. sometimes i didnt have an appopintment and they were empty but they are still awkward if you dont have an appointment.

Ditto that i'm size 18 too. But.... I know its a bit of a trek for you but there is a shop in Farnworth, Bolton called Because I Love You that do plus sizes. They have a wonderful selection - the sample dresses are plus size as well so you can see how well it truly fits. I went there a couple of weeks ago and they are really friendly and helpful Sarah

You can't find any idea of price online unless you're buying from China.

Thank you so much ladies!!! Amazing feedback!!

Hi Ladies!

Ive been reading your replies to this thread with horror! Im about to open a boutique near Peterborough in Cambs (opening weekend 2nd/3rd June) that is dedicated to the 16+ bride and to hear how some of you have been treated has really made me think about how I deal with customers. The store will have approx 50 sample dresses in size 16-30 in the most exquisite designs and you are GUARANTEED the treatment that any bride deserves (plus a glass of champagne!)

From personal experience I understand how awful the experience can be, and also the need to be open when the bride needs an appointment, not when it suits me most as a store owner, therefore my standard trading hours are 12 noon to 8pm Wednesday to Friday, 10-6 Saturday and 10-4 every Sunday. However this is also flexible and if the only day a bride had off to visit the store was a Monday then a private appointment could be arranged.

Dont just take my word for it ladies, come and visit Embrace Bridal Boutique - For brides with curves, on our opening weekend where you are guaranteed the warmest of welcomes.

This is great to hear.

While my bridal experiences have been great.

My first shop experience was debenhams where they were lovely but it was a bit formal for me, they also pushed the discount if I bought that week.

I bought my dress in Ireland where the shop assisstant listened to what I thought Id like to try and then brought me a selection. There was no problem about me trying on as many as I wanted and once I was in one she descretely backed away to allow me to take a moment and speak to my friends about each dress.

Im having my dress altered at a local shop where they make dresses and are making my bridesmaid dresses. There has been no problem about bringing in another shops dress for alterations. My only problem has been scheduling. My bridesmaids work mon to fri and I work Saturdays. The shop is closed sundays and mondays. This means while Ive managed to get to the girls first fittings I've only seen the basic bodice blocks and wont see the finished dresses until the day. I trust the shop to make them to be specifications as I know the owners.

When I got bridesmaids dresses for my sisters wedding at a shop in Glasgow. They were great when we went to try on, comfy sofas, drinks and snacks. Veyr helpful. But when we went back for alterations they would only do alterations on mon-thur. They had never mentioned this when we bought the dresses. Later I saw there was a small sign in the changing room that had said so but I would expect that they should have mentioned something as important as this before you hand over cash.

Ooo this! Definitely, it would really help to know when looking at online websites if the dress is likely to be within my budget!

Thank you sooo much ladies, all of this is very very helpful and you've given me some real food for thought! Any more or other comments are very welcome!!! The more I know the better the service and options available to you all!! x x