weddings

Despite my line spacing, the formatting isnt working for me. no idea why, have tried to edit.

Out of curiosity, how well do you know them? Would you decline simply because they included a twee poem if you knew them really well?

Waah - how funny - totally agree

better still the ones that dont tell you you have to pay at the bar then have the wedding in the middle of fricking nowhere with no cash machines

so these people who invited you to the wedding - do they know you at all? ?

I'm not enough of a *** to run a balance sheet in my head at these things, but I did sigh inwardly when H and I took time off work last year, schlepped down to middle England, stayed in the overpriced-and-pretentious-but-still crap hotel, only to discover that small matters such as transport between venues (an £80 taxi <faints> and ensuring that your guests don't die of humger and thirst had been mysteriously overlooked by the B&G.

Blimey, £80 taxi!! I agree, it is poor form. I am very amused that you're friends with such plebs, Nick.

For some bizarre reason I think it is less cheeky to verbally ask for cash as your wedding gift rather than ask for it in the invitation - I'm not sure why that is though ?

Tbh it doesn't really bother me that much. What does bother me is when B+G's don't take into consideration things like taxi rides, prices of drinks, accommodation, amount of food and drink etc.

However, my sil got an invitation by text to a work colleagues leaving do last week which read:

"Hi. 6pm Friday at my house. Can you bring £10 for Bernie who is getting the food. See you therex"

?

If your going to host a wedding - then I'm in favour of hosting it 100%. Not do it by halves.

If they can't decide on a wedding list, how will they agree on how to spend their 'high street' vouchers? ?

I'd have loved to provide a free bar at my wedding, but I couldn't. Wine was provided with the meal though. Hope people didn't call me a cheap fcuker like you just have!

I agree, Keef, it doesn't bode well for their marriage at all. ☹️

When we just moved to this country we were invited to the wedding reception a collegue of MrNeo. We hardly brought any cash as we were not aware that in this country you have to pay for your own drinks at weddings. In Belgium all drinks are included: beers, including speciality ones, wines, soft drinks (although spirits often aren't, but with the selection available already, it usually isn't an issue).

We only had a few pounds and managed to get 1 coke ? learned our lesson, always bring money to a UK wedding ?

We're at weddings quite a few times a year and most of them do not have a free bar, no matter how fancy or cheap the wedding is.

I want your friends ?

I don't think I've ever been to a wedding with free bars. Certainly ones where there has been some money behind the bar for a while but after that you have to buy your own but never free all night (I'm talking after dinner too).

I have never been to a wedding with a free bar. Including my own.

Perhaps it's just not a NI thing. I'd never call anyone tight because of it. In fact, I dread to think of the extra cost if I'd have had a free bar. <shudder and shrug at the same time>

I've never been to a wedding with a free bar

Mrs JMP, I agree. Either cut numbers or raise the budget.

I've never been to a wedding with a free bar either, including my own wedding.

I feel a bit of a schnorrer now, we didn't have a free bar at our wedding. in our defence though our venue had ordinary pub prices so guests weren't paying nine quid for two drinks

i've only been to two or three weddings with a free bar or beer tokens thrown in. i obviously have equally cheap friends ?

I would just like to add, I would never call anyone tight because they didn't have a free bar either.

I was just noting the cultural difference between weddings where I'm from and over here. Also, at most weddings in Belgium the bride and groom don't pay by the drink, you buy a "package" which includes unlimited amounts of drinks and it often works out quite cheap, especially compared to British prices!

Just in case anyone I know sees this, best my little mini-rant is deleted!

Same here -

although I'd love to know what a schnorrer is (thick me?!)

Ah yes it is the wedding season again. I have turned down 3 invites so far. I am loving the "I can't find a babysitter" excuse this year ?

FWIW at our wedding we had 2 drinks of choice on arrival, plus (just about unlimited) glasses of champagne, then a good few bottles of wine on the table and whiskey/champage for the toasts. It costs us a fortune. No way could we have done a free bar for the rest of the night!

WSS

I've never been to a wedding with a pay bar. Theyu have all been free bar or free drinks, including my own.

On one occassion however the B&G forgot to buy bottle openers so an usher had to fly to Saisnburys and buy a couple to open the wine ?

I've never been to a wedding with a free bar either. Every wedding I've been to has provided wine & welcome drinks but that's it. We've both got enormous, boozy families. There's no WAY I'd have a had a free bar at our wedding. It would have double our budget easily.

sorry i forget everyone else isn't a north leeds jewish type. it's yiddish, litterally for beggar but used as a word for a tight-wad. pronounced shh-norrer, not like 'sc' for school

i love yiddish words, they're so effective. ?

We covered wine, beer and soft drinks. I hope that didn't make us "cheap fcukers". Nobody seemed to complain.

I wouldn't refuse to go to a wedding just because someone had sent me a silly money poem either - it seems a bit of an overreaction tbh. Just don't give cash or "high street" vouchers. (although, it would be a wonderful excuse not to go to BIL's wedding in July as they are having a "wishing well" - no, I've no idea what that is either) ?

You know, I thought I'd heard it before (Boy1's father uses it I think).

I agree with Mrs Jess- Ive never been to a wedding without a free bar (although it's usually wine and beer only).

I've just reread the OP and to be fair Nick didn't say that - he was quoting someone else.

The only wedding I've been to where there was free bar was my own but that's only because our parents put some money towards it, otherwise we wouldn't have been able to.

did they have a poem that including lines similar to 'pop a card in our well, make a wish but sshhhh don't tell?' or 'throw in a token all colours will do, gold is our favourite but silver's good too' or both? ?

I also font agree with the notion of "cut numbers or increase the budget" - why? I wanted certain people there and as far as I know, weddings are an occasion to celebrate with family and friends, not an opportunity for me to spend a couple of grand on funding my pisshead friends. They were informed on the info sheet to bring some cash as not all drink would be provided and no one complained. I suspect I could have spent a couple of grand on a free bar if I wanted to but I chose to spend this on getting 3 members of my family accross the ocean to be with us on the day, which I think was rather more special.