What are you letting you OH organise?

My OH is helping me with everything but he didnt really want any specific tasks and I havent given any to him. We just sorta muck in together. The only thing he wont get involved in is the invites, as im such a perfectionist he doesnt want to get it wrong! lol!

Shopping for white shirts which are a certain sleeve length. Get him to do some research in to cakes and flowers he likes (then twist them into what you like!), get him to book his normal hair dressers for the week before the wedding.

My H2B is organising suits, invites (as he works in design) and photography. We have done some joint planning though too, on things like music etc. Its his day too, so I wanted to make sure that his input is included in most things so we both get the most out of it :o) x

My husband got off very lightly but I like to be in control.

The only task I gave him (other than turning up) was the honeymoon and even then I had to stick my nose in. He also came with me to organise the ceremony and the cake. He also wrote the Bidding prayer for our service for his brother to read out.

What about letting him do the cars, mens outfits (just tell him the colour scheme), find ideas for the honeymoon or even arrange it as a surprise - cannot think of anything else that I perhaps would have let my husband loose on!

Same here! We're a team! ?

Specific jobs he had on his own so far have been the honeymoon which is all booked as a surprise ? And the travel and hotel arrangements before hand (wedding night hotel, etc).

He picked his own suit, short & tie of course. Everything else is a joint decision. In fact, he chose the colour of the flowers for the tables! ?

Weve already booked the Honeymoon - gah there was NO WAY i was trusting him to book that all by himself - i am a Trip Advisor FREAK so i had to read ALL the reviews before booking!

I might get him to have a look at suits and look into the cake.

He would be soooo uninterested in flowers - he was there when we met the florist and thats more than enough.

OH is completely in charge of suits, the only condition being is that he takes a swatch of fabric to ensure that any colours he goes with don't clash with the colour scheme. I am of course gently advising him on the best colours to go with in advance!

He is also in charge of the wedding breakfast music - our venue have said we can submit a CD to play in the background and for some reason OH has got quite enthusiastic about that ? so that's fine by me.

Apart from that I don't think there's anything else that he is exclusively doing!

Oh god i would be scared to death that OH would pick bloody star wars theame tune or something to play through the dinner!

Suits i think i will let him choose what he likes and then tell him he has to have what i like! JOKE!

We have very similar tastes so i think we will go and pick together - heres hoping he dosnt have a suit dilema like i had the dress dilema!

My OH is exclusively in charge of suits but everything else we've done together. Other than my dress and accessories lol. I made the invitations and inserts myself but he approves everything first

We chose our flowers together, he had more ideas than me hehe! And he even asked for his rose button hole to be slightly more open than the rest ? I'd have never thought of that!

We are planning everything together (except obviously I will choose my dress on my own and he'll choose his suit). We're both getting married so I don't see why one person should lead on the planning and have never really understood the idea of "letting" (or not letting) the groom organise selected bits by himself - he is an adult too so I'm sure we can take joint responsibility!

We were supposed to be organising it together, OH had a few things to look after but I have to keep nagging to get him to do anything so it would have been less stressful just to do the whole thing myself!!!

OH is in charge of all the reception music and lights. We're having an ipod disco. I'm actually quite worried because his favourite band is The Fall and they are a very acquired taste. Everything else he is not the slightest bit interested in. He's buying his suit from Topman and he doesn't care what all the other men wear. Neither do I really.

We are doing everything together too. He is solely in charge of invite insides and information sheets. I also made him pick his suits - I picked my dress so only fair he gets to wear what he wants too!

Completely agree!

Yes both of us are getting married and my OH has heard all of the suggestions and has made some suggestions but i really dont think he would give a hoot about flowers and favors for instance, just the same as i couldnt give a hoot about some of the more masculine things.

Plus men are sometimes a bit useless unless they have a kick up the bum or a list of tasks

Nothing. I wanted it done properly.

For me it isn't really a case of 'letting' him do anything as much as actually physically 'getting' him to do something.

I put him in charge of the honeymoon which, to be fair, he has been looking at but then, so have I. I've asked him to go for the kilt measuring and arrange the hire. Its to be done in February sometime - so far no day has been arranged.

Apart from a couple of nights out to listen to bands, he pretty much isn't doing anything else. He is, however, causing me agro and saying he doesn't care whenever I ask a question or opinion then when I go and arrange whatever it is he'll say something like "what did you do that for, why did you not do xxxxx" V fustrating.

Don't get me wrong I wouldn't want him involved in every aspect but some degree of interest would be useful.

Sorry for the rant.

The simple answer was really honeymoon and kilts.....lol

? EXACTLY!

Gillsy i feel your pain!

What Gillsy said.

I desperately wanted us to plan our wedding together, as a team but it didn't seem to matter what I did he just wasn't in the slighest bit interested and his eyes glazed over as soon as any details were mentioned! He'd said right at the start that he didn't want to be "one of those grooms that just turn up on the day" but apart from me pestering him for approval (or otherwise) of what I'd basically already picked that's pretty much what happened. He gave a little bit of input into the menu.

Oh wait, that's unfair............ he also chose his Best Man ?

His job was to sort my ring (done ) and sort his suits (which i keep reminding him of!!) Other then that he's not sorting anything else out, as Im a stay at home Mum and he works so its not really fair, however I have involved him in EVERYTHING ask opinions etc which I think is very important especially seeing you will be making decisions the rest of your life together

Don't joke about that, thanks to my H we walked back up the aisle to The Throne Room from SW ? ?

ETA: He also sorted the HM, although we made a final decision together he did all the research and actual booking. He also sorted all the boys suits, I didn't know what they were wearing until the day. I think that's all, we made a pact at the beginning that he'll sort out the work we were having done on the house last year and I'll do the wedding.

I wanted us to both organise it but every time i asked him about something i got the answer of 'don't worry, it'll sort'. when i had a bridezilla moment n yelled at him asking who did he think would sort it, he admitted he couldn't think about 6 months away, he worked better if he was thinking about next week!

Most of the stuff i've organised then made sure he's seen it n likes it before i booked it. we're having a cd to be played during the meal n he's got quite involved in that but i've still had to find or download the songs!

We agreed when we got engaged that I would do the majority of the plannin gand he would do little things I asked him. So far, I've done everything although I did mock up a selection of invites and asked him to choose one so that I could get on with making them . He also had a hand in choosing his suit, but that's about it. He is excited about getting married and he pays attention when I talk to him about it, which is something I suppose.

Oooh forgot, he made a lovely suggestion a few weeks ago; as both of my parents have passed away and his grandparents have he suggested he make 2 big montages of family photos to place in the reception room and then in the evening do room for people to look at. He is really creative and did a degree in art so I have completely left it to him to do because I know it will be ace!

x

What Shoe said!

My husband wanted the marriage and the small details of flowers, cake etc were not on his list of priorities and to him are not important and don't make a marriage. Obviously we discussed what we both wanted and we chose the important things such as the ceremony venue and the reception together. The rest I would research show him ideas and if he had an opinion he would give it, I would then book it.

I did not arrange the whole day and him just turn up ?, its just I did not really give him much to do 'unassisted'.

Well yes this is fair enough, if your OH isn't the greatest at organising things then it might perhaps be a bit risky to leave whole chunks of planning up to him!

But of course not all men are like that; I am lucky as Mr Spoon is very good at organising things. It's amazing really, normal day-to-day stuff seems to completely baffle him sometimes, but give him a big important event that's over a year away and he is perfectly content!

I also couldn't really care very much at all about flowers, etc, (I want things to look nice but that is about as far as my interest goes) so I think we're coming at things from the same direction, if you see what I mean.

We went to a wedding show the other week and Mr Spoon went off to talk to a florist while I was doing something else; she was so surprised that a man had come to talk to her that it took her a while to compose herself. A few other businesses there also commented about him asking questions. That made me feel quite sad that the wedding industry is still so predominantly geared towards women.

Anyway, this is just a big bugbear of mine personally, didn't mean to divert the thread away from your original question.

We're planning everything together as well. He keeps saying everyone will be looking at me, maybe so but I keep having to remind him it's our day not mine. I'm tending to be searching and showing him the best of best.

x

We've made all the decisions together really but on his own he has designed the STD magnets, built the website, sorted the band, the bar and will sort out his suits.

well i asked OH to book wedding night hotel and cars. BUT he said i am so fussy i'd just recheck his decision anyway so i might as well do it myself - and he is right. so i'm booking the hotel tomorrow and have started thinking about having a car (dont really want one). for everything, i tend to narrow it down to the top 3 or 4 options and then discuss them with him. he came to the cake tasting and we chose the flavours together. and we chose the menu together - took his parents to the tasting. and met the tog - we actually ended up going with the one he really liked. so i guess he's been pretty good when i needed him! good quality in a H2B methinks xx

The invitations, because he's a designer and the men's suits are all I asked him for, but I've asked him for his opinion on things, when I've narrowed them down. Also, as the suits show no sign of happenning I've put together a document for him with prices and pictures, hoping that'll spur him into action. The annoying thing is that he doesn't want responsibility for anything but then complains when I choose something he doesn't like - take, for example the minimoon - we want to go to a nottingham resto at the end of it, so I'd done loads of research, around somewhere to stay before and decided that a center parcs exec lodge would be really nice. His response (sorry CP devotees in advance) "I don't want to go to Butlins on honeymoon".