Bedtime for a 14 year old?

Probably between 9-10.

What time does he want to go to bed? what is a late time that makes him grumpy?

6.45pm. ?

My mum added on 15 minutes for every school year. By 14, my bed time was <counts> 8.30pm barring guide night, which was 9.30pm.

Well, G wants to be able to stay up as late as he wants (obviously), Mr Hole thinks it should stay at 9 and I'm thinking 9.30, any later than that and he's really not getting enough sleep.

However, I know a lot of people that let their teenagers stay up until past 10.00pm and wonder if I'm being mean?

He goes to bed when we do at weekends, so there's no time limit then really.

My 14 year old, (15 on Thursday) brother goes to bed about 11pm. My parents are far to easy when it comes to bedtime. The thing is he spends half of his life in his bedroom on the computer or watching TV, so it's at 11pm the tv goes off.

I think 9pm is a little early. My 12 year old step daughter goes to bed at 9pm, her 9 year old sister goes to bed at 8.30pm.

Luke is 14 next week (which is terrifying!) He has to be upstairs by 9pm (he has a shower and makes sure his bag and uniform are ready for the next day before that. I usually start asking whether he's all ready at about 8:40pm) He is then allowed to read until 9:30pm when his light goes off.

He gets up at about 07:30am the following morning and doesn't seem to be too grumpy.

I was going to post about pocket money actually. I've never bothered with it before as he's fairly low maintenance but recently he seems to be wanting to do more things. What is an appropriate amount per week and should he be contirbuting to chores to earn it or not? He already does the ironing for a fiver per basket (which is an excellent deal for me!)

I'm pretty sure at that age for me it was about 10pm or maybe 9.30. I wouldn't say later than 10 if he's having to get up early.

It was very good, thank you! His friend was super well behaved, as most teenage boys are when they're in the company of anyone bar their own mothers ?. Granny and Grandad 1 came to visit Saturday afternoon and then treated us all to a takeaway, which was v nice. Granny and Grandad 2 came over with my brother yesterday for 'lunch'. However, their car broke down and they didn' get here until gone 3. I of course played the drama queen and told them lunch was ruined ?

My cake went down well though, there was only a sliver of it left by the time Mr Hole, my brother, my Dad and G had finished ?

I think up to bed at 9pm & lights out by 9.30 would be ok.

My brother does sweet FA and gets his child benefit money. I used to have to work like crazy to get £1 a chore pocket money but mum & dad are far to easy with him. Having said that, he rarely uses it as he doesn't go out much. Football training, or karate the rest of the time is computers or footy in the park.

I pay £1 a chore to my eldest SD and 50p a chore to the youngest. They are with us 6 nights out of 14 and have set chores. It was th easist way we could work it out.

it doesn't seem fair that the eldest is getting double what the youngest is getting per chore. Then again, are the chores easier for younger one?

I'd say 9.30pm bed, read till 10pm - with scope to negotiate for nights out / special event tv.

The chores are much easier for the younger one, dusting / layng the table / feeding the animals. The eldest has to clean the bathroom, iron and do the washing up. Plus the eldest needs her money as she goes out and we aren't going to fund that every week, whereas the youngest just spends it on crap from Claires accessories ?

I have ongoing battles with my mother about this wrt my 14yo brother. He frequently doesn't go to bed until 11 and gets up at 6.30. At the weekends he sleeps until 1pm or so which I think means he is not getting enough sleep in the week. Obviously I am not the one there every night fighting with him but as he is also epileptic and being tired makes him fit more, I feel pretty strongly about it.

If you go with at least 8 hours then a kid getting up at 6.30 should be asleep by half 10. I'd be tempted with upstairs at half nine, lights out ten. It's much easier if you set a precedent (sp?) now and then give him an extra half an hour when he gets to 16 or so. Trying a later bedtime and then having to bring it forwards again becuse he's too tired is never going to be easy or a popular decision.

BTW is there any particular reason why he wants to be up late? Older sibling? Particular TV prog? If the latter, could you video/sky + it?

No, there's no reason he wants to be up late other than he thinks he should be.

I'm sure I read somewhere that teenagers need a shedload of sleep due to all the changes going on in their bodies. It's hardwork being a stroppy so and so, eh? ?

I think I'll do the bed then half hour until lights out, I hadn't thought of doing that before. He really is a grumpmeister if he's tired, I don't know where he gets it from ?

Thank you, everyone ?

Master D's bedtime is 10pm (he's 14 in April, so still more 13) on a weeknight. He gets woken up at 7.45am and we leave the house for school at 8.30am. He's generally pretty good about getting up in a morning, but sometimes I know he's sneaked a few extra minutes watching tv the night before because he's a bit slow in rising ?. 15 year old stepson stays at ours 3 nights a week, two of which are school nights and he has to be in bed for 11pm. Weekends is whenever really, no set time. I'd say somewhere between 9.30 and 10 sound about right if he's one that needs his sleep.

As for pocket money, Master D gets £10 a week on a Monday. For this he has to do chores and every time I ask him to do something, if I get a moan, whinge, non-response, he has to pay me back some money for non-compliance. So far this has worked well and my dishwasher is constantly being emptied and refilled, the bins are being emptied and taken out to the wheelie bin and he helps with the two little ones as well at bath and bedtime. It seems to be a good incentive for him because he actually gets the cash in his hand and doesn't want to part with any of it so does what I ask 99% of the time - he's not had to repay me any money - yet ?

My 15 and 13 year old boys have to be in their rooms from 9pm and lights off around 10pm, but most nights I have to go in and check everything is off, remove ipods, mobiles etc..

We used to think we were cool reading a book by torchlight, this lot try to use their laptops on msn under the duvets, I feel like soome mad jailer half the time?

"What do you mean there is a laptop under the duvet? There is nothing there! The 15" ridge with the light shining through? ? Nope, I can't see it?" ?

We do this to. However we don't pay upfront, but I'm liking the concept. Youngest has been pretty lazy of late with not hanging her clothes up, or screwing clothes up and just launching them in the cupboard or wardrobe, without a second thought. I'm sick of ironing her clothes so every time she doesn't comply she doesn't get her chore money. She's learning.

SD is 16 next month and gets up at 6:45 if she gets the bus or 7:15 if she's driven (we live 10 miles from her school). We start reminding her to wind down for the evening at 10pm with the view to her being out of the bathroom, ready and in bed for 10:30pm, after that it's laptop off and lights out at 10:45 but in reality she is usually asleep before then. She's a pretty sensible kid really and will take herself off to bed earlier if she's tired, we're very lucky.

WRT money, Brother 1 (16) gets £30 EMA a week (or should do as soon as the Govt get their arse in gear to give it to him?) and the deal is that £20 goes to my mum as 'rent' and he keeps the other £10 with which he pays bus fare and 'pocket money'. He also has two part time jobs. He does his ironing, makes his lunch, keeps his room tidy/clean etc but this isn't connected to his money.

Brother 2 (14) gets £10 every 3 weeks (don't ask!). It goes directly into his bank account to encourage him to save it rather than spend on sweets etc, although he has a cash card he can use if he wants the money. He loses it 50p at a time if he is persistently naughty.

They both can earn extra by doing chores: paring socks 5p a pair (!), ironing (anyone else's clothes - they don't get paid for doing their own) and washing the car and van.

There is no set bed time for J and she's 13. I kick her off the PC around 10:30pm (if she's still on it; she's often not) and I keep track in her homework diary so I know that things get done. She isn't great in the morning but has trouble sleeping (not surprising really, given that she's not used to somewhere that's entirely safe to sleep!).

I've found the best way to help her sleep at night is to wake her up at bang on 7am ? (School doesn't start until 9:20am).

ETA - she gets £30 a month pocket money and that has to cover everything bar school lunches and toiletries (she walks to school). Each week she has to wash up, vaccum and keep her room tidy to earn it.

My 13 yr old goes to bed at 9.30pm on a school night, my 15 yr old (will be 16 next month) goes at 10 o'c.