Can i have my mum not sit near me at the wedding?

Is a hard one, I had similar with my mum and didnt want her on the top table so we just had our bestan and MOH w on the top table and we made parents hosts of the other tables. It works well but I would suggest if you are not putting her with any other close family you would need to do the same with the in laws. If your mum is not with family and they are then that is making an obvious sttament, and you don't purposely want to cause upset, but it is your day so do what makes you comfortable x

I agree with Charlotte - it's fine not to have her sitting with you at the reception, but you need to treat your fiance's parents the same as her or it is going to cause a lot of hurt and drama. You could have a sweetheart table with just you and your OH.

If you don't want her sitting near other family members, then I would spread immediate family out so that some are sitting on each table. You can play it as the family 'hosting' the tables if you think it will be more acceptable, or just say that you want to mix up family & friends as you thought it would be more interesting for people to talk to those who know the bride & groom in a different context. But whatever you do, make sure that your mother isn't 'singled out' in any way as being different to your OHs parents, as that will create a lot of comment.

I'm a bit concerned by your comment that your fiance 'made you' ask your mum to walk you down the aisle though - does he have a habit of making you do stuff you don't want to do? I didn't want my mum walking me down the aisle, and my OH worked with me to find a solution that avoided that without upsetting my mum.

Definitely agree with the other comments but can I ask if the relationship is that bad with your mother then why did you agree to have her give you away x♥️ not meaning to be nasty I know how family can be x

Whilst I totally appreciate the other replies - it is your day and you can choose where people sit.


We don’t get on with my FIL and had him on a table far from ours (with his parents) whilst my parents, my step mum, my MIL and her partner were on the top table with the best man and his partner. I don’t think FIL was v happy but he knew not to make a scene and tbh, we don’t really care - it was enough that we invited him. If he had said anything though, we were primed to explain how we wanted to sit him with his partner and there simply wasn’t space for both of them on the top table.
That said, I don’t know your family dynamics - ours are such that it wasn’t a huge deal and those who know us totally understood but I do appreciate in some families what we did may cause drama!
Bottom line though, it is your day and you shouldn’t put yourself in an uncomfortable situation for fear of someone else not liking it (a running theme on this forum!).

I also think you can only make the decision no one else can tell you what to do ♥️

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So he said that because he thought that she might get upset if I chose my sister instead as she has been with my through the hard times unlike my mum

He doesn't usually make me do things as so but I had a chat with my sister and she agrees that I should as my mum would probably become upset if it were anyone else. I think I want to seperate siblings and family so that there are no issues and put my mum with my OH's auntie as they are the Karen's of the wedding.

Only you can decide x♥️

We are having a 'sweetheart' table for the top table which means it's just the bride and groom and no one else.


I don't have a good relationship with my mom and her husband, but I have a fantastic one with my in-laws-to-be which would be commented on it by my mom in a negative manner