Going to a wedding on your own

I prefer to go out without H. I see him enough at home, so when I go out, I like to mingle with other people. Plus, it gives me and H something new to talk about.

I'd go alone.

This, assuming youd know others there?

I'd go on my own. I often go to "events" on my own if it coincides with a weekend when H has his kids for example, and actually it's always much mroe fun thatn I anticipate. once you're there it will almost certainly be fine.

I will know people but everyone I know will be in couples. I don't know if it's the pregnancy thing that's bothering me, I feel quite pathetic and insecure. Being pregnant and turning up to an event without my husband, I just don't want to do it. F***ing Football. I hate it so much. H & I never argue but I could really shout and kick and scream over this.

I went to a friends wedding on my own last year. I was a bridesmaid but as soon as the ceremony was over, I was bored senseless as I didn't really know anyone. I would go on my own if I knew people but if I was fancied with going on my own and knowing barely anyone then I probably wouldn't. That wedding really put me off.

ETA: Actually scrap that I'm an outgoing person and normally unknown groups don't phase me but her friends were so dull and boring, plus there was nothing much going on to get involved with so all in all just a big flop. I would go to a different wedding on my own, I just hope it's never as boring as that one was!

I had one half of a couple drop out for our wedding and my friend brought a chum instead - I was happy that she was happy but I did think she was a bit of a wimp! I'd go on my own but then I'm not bothered by being sat with people I don't know, it's all part of the fun as far as I'm concerned!

One of my good friends got married in March. H couldn't go as he couldn't get the time off work.

I went on my own and drove. It was fine. I didn't really know anyone that well but I wasn't short of conversations.

If I wasn't pregnant, I don't think I would be anywhere near as bothered as I am to be honest. I'm not a massively confident person to start with and being pregnant has taken what little confidence I had. I feel very insecure.

I cannot tell you how much I was sh!tting myself on the train waiting to meet the the Brummie Hitched girls. I barely said anything all day either.

she lies, she was a right loud gobby caaaawwww!!!

Not sweet and quiet then... ?

I am not usually so bad, be that because I can't drink (which is a terrible thing to rely on!) or because I don't recognise my own body but I am definitely a lot more reserved than usual at the moment.

We have been invited to an ex-workmates evening do in a few months but H has a gig (surprise surprise!)

I felt a bit strange going by myself as there would only be 1 or 2 otehr people ther i know from where i used to work and we werent close!

but she has now invited another friend i used to work with who i do get on well with so ive invited her and her H to stay at ours so i have someone to go with and chat too!

Ooh your naughty H! I could picture mine telling me he didn't want to go in those circumstances - stupid football and play offs! But TBH I WOULD kick up a fuss about it, you have been invited, he's accepted the invite I assume? So to drop out on you now isn't fair IMO. Even if he isn't fussed about the bride, he was going to the wedding with you, and has put you in an awkward position. FWIW I don't think you're being a wimp - especially when pregnant, that does change things I'm sure, and it does make a difference to me WRT having a drink to relax.

Have you explained to your H how this is making you feel?

Before I met OH I was invited to a wedding without a plus 1 which was totally grand as I was technically single although had been dating the same person for a few months. (He was invited to the evening) However, because I was clearly an 'odd and end' I was put at a table with the children and crazy relatives who they clearly didn't know who to sit with!!!! IT WAS AWFUL!! I knew lots of other folks so the girls came and rescued me to the bar in between courses but it was dire to say the very least.

Not suggesting this will be your experience but you could always ask the bride if you could sit with people you know seeing as you will be without OH.

Personally, I wouldn't go alone as I'm very shy and not very confident so I do tend to "hide" behind H and his personality and without him I'd struggle.

If it was a wedding for my friends or mutual friends, then I'd go anyway, have a wail of a time and be really snarky with H about it (I'm not proud of the latter part!). If it was one of H's friends, then I maybe wouldn't go by myself. Pregnancy does make you feel more vulnerable and (dare I say) needy though, so I understand why you're apprehensive about going alone.

I'd be pissed off at him for dropping out so close to the day assuming you'd accepted on behalf of the pair of you though. That's poor form.

I'd feel a bit nervous about going on my own, but I know I would be fine once I got there and started talking to people etc.

Mr C is a big football fan but I wouldn't let him bail out on a wedding because of a game. In fact I don't think he would even dare ask.

Is he going to the game or just watching on the tv? Is it a late kick-off? If so he could come to the wedding and watch the game later?

I understand why you don't feel that you can go alone, I would want a few glasses in me too!! I have been to events before where I haven't known anyone and it can be very intimidating.

Could you go to the day and then miss the evening part?

I really can not understand why people get married in the football season !

And he'll be even more upset when West Ham beat them in the playoffs !

Because life does not revolve around football... it's only a game...

*ducks*

Fotball isnt a matter of life or death.....

Its more important than that !

I felt very vulnerable when pregnant so I can understand how you feel. For your OH to not go due to football is a poor effort and poor excuse. If it was my wedding I would be v pissed off if someone dropped out due to that. Dud he accept then decline because that's not really on. If I knew lots of people I would go and just wouldn't stay late, if I knew no one I wouldn't go as I'm not confident enough to spend the day talking to people I don't know. Oh and I'd be well annoyed with H and let him know about it.

He might not even be going to the match yet (it depends if his team get through to the finals). If they do, it will be an all day thing for him and his son to go to Wembley so he won't even be able to come to the evening.

My parents are coming to the evening so I'd have to stay for them really. I think I'll feel ashamed that he has chosen football over being with me at a wedding. I get me own way a lot and I know he values me over football but I know how important this is to him too so don't want to start stamping my feet.

I feel the same about football. A few times this year OH has said either no or yes but we will be late to things all because of football. Makes me so mad! Really important things too!

I feel your pain Panj as Mr T is football mad. I've just learnt to live with it.

Sounds like he'd be dropping out quite close to the wedding. If it were my wedding I'd be royaly p'd off that someone who had accepted dropped out to go to something else. They may have already paid for the meal.

I'd probably go on my own if I knew people. Part of me would feel embarassed about Mr GB dropping out but I would feel awful costing them the price of 2 meals.

Same here. For the first 4 years Mr Knees and I were together, he was player/manager of a local team. We only ever had last minute weekends away when football was called off, or we'd have to wait for football to finish and leave after 5, to just about make it somewhere for a Saturday night out. Friday nights away meant leaving early to be back in time for football. He gave up for one year and was then called back when the new manager quit! He's promised this year is his last year, but I'll believe it when I see it.

I'd go to a wedding on my own if they were friends of mine, but I'd feel a bit uncomfortable if they were friends of his.

I would go mental at OH if he did this. He is addicted to watching his team but I would expect him to put that to one side for the wedding day especially if we had accepted. I would only go on my own if I knew others really well. I hate being on my own at functions, oonce I am there I get on with it and socialise, but I don't like having to go on my own.

I know how you feel Panj because if we were in the same situation then I know OH would do the exact same thing. He even came home half way through a wedding last year to watch Liverpool then drove back again. It's really frustrating to think he would do that but I know there's no chance of me reasoning with him.

Just have to hope they don't get through, but if they do then if I were you I would go on my own for a bit and see how you get on. You can always leave early if you feel uncomfortable. I would be pretty miffed now if my friends H said they weren't coming to the wedding because of football though ?

I know he is not as bad as some (if he played or managed a team I think i would have gone mad by now), it's not every weekend after all. He has explained a few things to me now and I am seeing things slightly differently. I still don't want to have to go without him but feel a bit more accepting of it if he doesn't come.