Hen party stress!!

Weddings are expensive to attend just as a guest, chuck in hen and stag parties and it soon adds up. Right now cost of living is crippling and there is no way of telling what the future holds for anyone financially, Even your friend who you say can afford it and appears comfortable financially is maybe earing on the side of caution and prioritizing their spending, or is facing financial struggles you don't know about, . Same as not wanting to leave their child, everyone parents differently so if they are not comfortable with it you have to respect their choice. You also need to consider people may not have annual leave to take off, even for a mini break.

I absolutely get you want to go abroad, but this is your choice, and you really need to weigh up what is more important, going abroad, or having the right people with you and only you can make that decision. Maybe sound them out about a UK break, as if they were to still say no to that then that helps you decide to still go abroad with the others who can, as you wouldn't have them there anyway.

Please don't take this the wrong way, I don't think you are a Princess and fully understand why you are upset, but I do think you need to check the reality of it, the main event is your wedding and having the right people there on the day, the Hen is lovely, but really not that big a deal, IMO. I would much rather have had no Hen do to ensure my closest friend as were able to afford to spend the day with me on my wedding

I think Charlotte has nailed the response here.

I understand that you want your hen to be how you imagined and its your celebration, but I think you need to be a little more understanding. Please don't take this the wrong way, but times are tough right now. Just because someone seems financially stable doesn't mean they are as comfortable as you think or that they aren't saving for something important. Also, I wouldn't want to leave a small child either. It is difficult for parents and as someone without children I get it can be frustrating when our friends with children can't do something, but parenting is hard.

Ideally I too would want an abroad hen, but I have been in the position in the past where I was struggling just to live and I had to say no to things I wanted to attend. I didn't want to put any of my friends in that position. So I chose a weekend away in the UK, as it was very affordable and we found a lovely place with a hot tub. My bridesmaids have done an amazing job at organising activities and we are even going for a nice dinner, followed by a cocktail bar one night. It was important to me that my friends were there with me and we have a great time wherever we are. I also didn't want to burden them with an expensive hen, knowing how tough things are right now.

I think you need to decide whether its more important for you to have all your friends there, or to go abroad. If you pick the latter you need to accept that not everyone will come for various reasons and you will need to take that with grace.

I bet you will have an amazing time either way! Best wishes to you

I think you should consider having two separate events, one abroad and one in the UK, to accommodate everyone. Alternatively, explore more affordable destinations or compromise on the length of the trip. Communication is key in finding a solution that works for everyone.

Charlotte's advice is spot on. Yes, as a bride you can make whatever decisions you like about your hen do, but you do need to prepare for the fact that the more demands a hen do makes in terms of time and money, the more likely you are to have people unable to come.

It's ok to feel upset if some of your friends can't come to an overseas hen do, but I don't think you should feel let down. Everyone has their own struggles and difficulties, and even the closest friend doesn't know the full picture - someone can be unable to come to your hen do and still be a really good friend.