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kj82
Beginner December 2010

Lady registrars...

kj82, 28 April, 2010 at 20:25 Posted on Planning 0 28

Our registrar is going to be a lady and I was a bit shocked lol. I'd always imagined being married by a man. I'm actually a little put off now. That makes me seem really awful doesn't it!!! Surely I can't be the only one though?? lol

28 replies

Latest activity by artisanwedding.co.uk, 5 May, 2010 at 11:19
  • Daisy82
    Beginner
    Daisy82 ·
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    We'v got a lady too. It doesn't bother me really. Hadn't thought about it until just now x

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  • aliaisp
    Beginner July 2010
    aliaisp ·
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    Got no idea who i have got, must book a meeting with them asap. but i would love to have a lady registrar! somehow got this very sexist feeling that she would be a bit more romantic/soft?? lol xx

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  • bethanw
    Beginner May 2010
    bethanw ·
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    We've got a woman. I think I prefer it although I don't know why! Ours is a bit scary.

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  • VikingPrincess
    Beginner December 2011
    VikingPrincess ·
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    Don't know yet what we have, but being from Romania originally (though I've lived in the UK for 15 years) I am used to female registrars. In Romania you would be hard pressed these days to find a male one as most administrative posts in the local government and public authorities are female!

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  • VikingPrincess
    Beginner December 2011
    VikingPrincess ·
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    By the way, love that you're a fellow Xmas bride, even though ours is not until 2011!

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  • lisaloulou
    Beginner
    lisaloulou ·
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    We had a lady registrar. She was absolutley lovely, I couldn't have asked for a better or nicer person to marry us. When we met her at one of our interview thingys I was so hoping that we'd get her on the day as they don't guarantee it.

    Have you met yours?

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  • Gillsy
    Beginner April 2010
    Gillsy ·
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    We had a lady - I was the opposite, I expected a lady and would have been suprised if it were a guy....lol

    Im sure she will be absolutely fine and your ceremony will be perfect

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  • GeordieBarbie
    Beginner May 2010
    GeordieBarbie ·
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    You're not alone!!

    I always said i'd request a male registrar but I was so panicked trying to get them booked I forgot, and haven't had the courage to check yet.

    I know we'll have a woman and i am very sad about that - I don't want to be married by a woman... ?

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  • Mrs C
    Beginner March 2011
    Mrs C ·
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    I have never seen a male registrar!

    The last church wedding I went to had a female vicar too... we are taking over!!!

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  • Juicymelons
    Beginner May 2010
    Juicymelons ·
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    Hi

    We are having a lady registrar, she seems lovely ?

    Think I prefer a lady but no idea why !

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  • Bob - An Image For You
    Bob - An Image For You ·
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    In all the years I have photographed registry weddings, I have only ever seen three men registrars and the last one was about 12 years ago!

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  • Lynseys Designs
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    Lynseys Designs ·
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    So did I and our registrar was lovely even though she stepped in with only a days notice since the original registrar (also a lady) was sick.

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  • Josiep00
    Beginner December 2010
    Josiep00 ·
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    Hi KJ! My fellow xmas lady!

    When do you find out who your registrar is? I'm picking up our certificate thingy that allows us to get married today - yay!

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  • Saracroft251
    Beginner August 2010
    Saracroft251 ·
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    Out of interest ...............why does it matter what sex the registrar is? ? Surely they will do the same job as any man?

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  • B
    Beginner July 2010
    brideseekingblush ·
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    I find it a very odd thing to care about one way or the other! I hadn't even thought about it, but presumed it would be a woman as they mostly are.

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  • GeordieBarbie
    Beginner May 2010
    GeordieBarbie ·
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    Mine stems from being brought up in the days when marriages were in one of 2 places - a church if you were religious or a registry office if you weren't.

    Being brought up catcholic all weddings I knew of were in a church and conducted by preists (obviously) who were men (back in the days when women priests didn't exist).

    So, i've always known (or thought) that i'd be married by a man (and rightly or wrongly, don't really agree with women priests - don't ask me why, I can't really work out why! ?).

    Fast forward to present day and the majority of weddings i've been to are civil ceremonies and the registar is always a woman. Que slightly bizaree and irrational fear of a woman marrying me - marriages should be done by men (i.e priests)

    Yes, i'm a bit wierd! ? I still haven't requested my male registar yet like i've threatened to do for years. Mainly cos i'm sure they'll say "we don't have any"

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  • shoegal01
    Beginner October 2010
    shoegal01 ·
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    Why are you not getting married in a Catholic Church by a preist then?

    I hvae never been to a wedding where the registrar was a man!

    They have always been women!

    I dont care who marrys us as long as they are lovely.

    Funnily enough my OH said to me the other day that having a civil ceremony means we will be getting married by a woman and he seemed a little bit bothered - probs beause he was brought up in a Catholic family. But once i said to hiim why does it matter he couldnt answer and realised he was being silly.

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  • GeordieBarbie
    Beginner May 2010
    GeordieBarbie ·
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    Becuase I'm not a practicing catholic anymore and my OH is not catholic so would have to get christened which he doesn't want to do as he's not religious.

    You're right - it doesn't make any different, and I'm sure afterwards I won't care, it's just what I know.

    One of the compromises to havinga civil cereomny was that it had to be a "grand" venue for the ceremony - not just a hotel room. Until i became an adult, all weddings I went to was ina church and therefore had the traditional feel and huge aisle and what-have-you. So it was all i knew.

    It's just one of the random traditional values I have!

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  • shoegal01
    Beginner October 2010
    shoegal01 ·
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    Same with me and OH, he wanted to get married in a Church but i am not catholic and didnt fancy getting christened or attending lessons for 6 months prior to the wedding.

    You are a very traditional kinda gal arnt you!

    Hopefully you will get your male registrar

    x

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  • GeordieBarbie
    Beginner May 2010
    GeordieBarbie ·
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    Shoey - I think my fear of women registrars is like your fear of Maggie dresses ? I just need to get over it! ?
    I don't for one minute think i'll get a male one.

    Yep - there are a few issues i'm very traditional on - marriage is one of them. That's why I have to have here comes the bride and the wedding march as our music!

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  • shoegal01
    Beginner October 2010
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    Ohhhh GB i dont think i will EVER get over that! ?

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  • lizzyleek
    Beginner October 2010
    lizzyleek ·
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    I must admit when me and H2B went to the registry office to give notice the lady registrar who done our interview was lovely and by the end of the interview we were asking her to try and work out the paperwork so she marries us lol so was so nice and we just felt at ease straight away with her!

    xx

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  • D
    Beginner October 2010
    drifter ·
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    Hmm just to mix it up

    we are having a lady vicar to marry us. Personally as long as the person marrying us is lovely and we have all taken time to meet and discuss expectations etc before the wedding then I don't mind if it is a man or a woman!

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  • MarieMarie1980
    Beginner August 2010
    MarieMarie1980 ·
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    We are having a lady reverend too... She is really nice and friendly. We have been to her house and OH is horrified that she doesnt own a TV!!! LMAO...

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  • Stazzle
    Stazzle ·
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    Just seen this thread...it has really surprised, and baffled, me!

    Like brideseekingblush and Saracroft said, I honestly don't know what difference it makes...and actually I think it's pretty sexist to be really against having a woman marry you! Am really quite dumbfounded that some people feel this way!

    I don't know if it will be a man or woman marrying us...I've always imagined it to be a woman for what it's worth, but I am honestly not bothered either way. Don't mean to offend anyone, but it seems so unbelievably backwards to be against a particular sex in a profession in this way!

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  • VeeDubLuv
    Beginner November 2012
    VeeDubLuv ·
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    Everyone has their own perfect idea of what their day should be but I personally thought it was about you and you hubby to be, and making that commitment to each other. Not who is marrying you!!!

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  • C
    Civil Ceremonies ·
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    Although I am a 'Lady Registrar' I shall not take umbrage!

    However, a request for a male registrar would certainly not be accommodated where I work and to be honest there are so few the chances would be slim anyway.

    Aren't you asking your local council to discriminate on the grounds of sex? I'm pretty sure that's illegal in the workplace and if the registrar's place of work is your venue then that's their workplace too.

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  • artisanwedding.co.uk
    artisanwedding.co.uk ·
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    LOL! MAle registrars are very rare. Certainly locally there is no more than 1 male per registry office...

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