Thank you gifts for parents - When? And just mums or dads too?

I think your Mum is right. Traditionally the gifts are given out during the speeches- although I thought it was the groom who gave them all out- the mothers, bridesmaids and best man/ushers. I think that's when we'll be doing us. I think traditionally fathers did not get anything, but I'll be getting them both something.

xx

The general consensus on hitched is: do whatever you like! Don't feel the need to follow a 'tradition' just for the sake of it; and don't be too swayed by other people's opinions - remember things were different when your mum got married.

I got my BMs jewellery so I gave this to them in the morning so that they could wear it for the wedding. We gave out the rest of the presents as part of OH's speech. We gave presents to our 2 witnesses, the best man and usher and to our parents. I think it is ridiculous to say that Dads don't get anything, but Mums do! My Dad did loads of stuff for the wedding (as well as my Mum) so we gave our parents joint presents.

I hope this helps!

I think its up to you TBH...as a guest I certainly would not bat an eyelid if I did not see you give your parents a gift.

We personally are not doing gifts for our parents as we are paying/planning and organising our wedding ourselves so nothing to thank them for.....My understanding of the tradition is that you give them a gift to thank them for their financial contribution therefore if they have both contributed it is polite to buy gifts of thanks to both.....(we are doing gift bags for every day guest though so will have the same as everyone else)

This. You don't have to do it any particular way and you should get presents for whoever you want to regardless of what your mum says.

We gave our parents their presents the day before and bridesmaids/ushers the morning of the wedding.

Same here, plus with us there is step-parents as well that have been in lives for 25 years!! Saves on politics!!

We wont be giving out any gifts during the speeches, instead, the BM's/Ushers will get theirs before hand in person from me and H2B. I would like to get each set of parents a photo album which they will probably get months after by the time they have chosen their photos and the albums have been made up. Helps with the money side of things too as we won't need to save the money for their presents before the wedding ?

We are giving my mum and stepdad thier gift tomorrow as we will both be together with them and dont want to do it infront of his parents as they have't helped (or even offered to help) with anything, but mine are paying for the reception and cabin that we're having, i'm going to be giving our kids there necklaces on the morning so they can wear them on the day.

We will be getting our parents something (or rather, Ant's parents and my mom), as they are all contributing something to the wedding. And also as a bit of a thank you for raising us to be awesome. There's no way we're handing them out during the wedding itself, though. I think our plan will end up being that we give them out the night before.

Thanks for all your opinions ? Guess I got some thinking to how to get around this with mum now ?

We did most gifts during the speeches (cufflinks for ushers, painting for MOH, tanzanite earrings for mothers) but fathers got theirs (carved wooden bowls from where we married) the day before, and I'm not sure OH has actually given best man his yet! (actually, just asked him, it's on order!)

At my friend's wedding recently they have them out during the speeches and, I'll be honest, I got a bit bored. As did others who knew they weren't getting anything. The guests didn't see any if them because they were given out in gift bags and just handed to the people in quick succession so even the bride and groom didn't really see the reactions to them. There was also some very poor over-acting by the mother of the bride who obviously knew she was getting some flowers but acted like it was a total surprise and they'd bought her a boat or something.

Our gifts will be given out the morning of or the night before the wedding. OH will give the boys when they are getting ready and I'll give the girls. I want to see their reactions so I know they like it and, as far as I'm concerned, it's noone else's business who gets a gift or what they got and why.

Nobody will think it strange if you don't give gifts out publicly. It's very common these days.

ETA dads should definitely get a gift if they've helped in anyway, even just being supportive or a great dad, if the mums are. It's only fair. Just to clarify before anyone takes offence, I meant common as in a lot of people do gifts privately, not it's trashy common if you give gifts during speeches.

For the BMs we got them jewelry for the day, which I gave them the night before. I also bought the groom, best man, ushers and both dads socks with "groom", "best man" etc on the side, as a little joke present! Was really touched that the best man wore them even though they were too small!

we also gave gifts during the thank you speech that hubby and I gave. Bm's, ushers, dads, mum's, aunt (my stand in mum and best friend), and for one of the kids who did a reading. We didn't make a huge thing out of it and had only one other speech (my stepson)

We didn't give out gifts during the speechs as we decided we'd rather do it privately. I gave my BM her pressi on the morning (earings), the best man got it the day before (book and magazine subscription) and our parents were given their gifts the day before after the rehersal. We gave each set of parents rose bushes as they all like their gardens and this was something that they could enjoy in the future.

I also gave my brothers cufflinks on the day after the meal when there was a quiet moment. These were just from me and we hadn't got OH's sisters anything (he didn't want to) so I didn't want to do it in front of everyone. I did the same for my mum - gave her a necklace which was just from me to her and given on the morning when she was helping me get ready.

You should do whatever if appropraite for you and your OH.

I brought my Mum and beautiful mum journal which i gave her the night before as i knew she would cry and there would be enough tears on the day.

I also brought her a pearl bracelet to wear on the day which i gave her in the morning. I brought my dad, father of the bride socks, cufflinks and a personalised wallet.

OH and I also brought them a weekend away voucher as they helped us out so much with the wedding which I gave them before everyone arrived the morning of the wedding as I wanted to say a personal thank you not in front of everyone.

I also gave my BMS their presents (jewelerry) and OH gave ushers theirs in the mornings (individual cufflinks and socks and wallets).

I think these days anything goes! We're giving bridesmaids jewellery to wear on the day and hopefully again afterwards (am looking for something lovely) and the best man /usher / my dad cufflinks and maybe socks. Also planning on getting a small photo book for my parents and mother in law to be (TOG we're looking at does a package including this). Mum's I'm not sure about what we'll get but definitely a token of thanks be it flowers or something nice.

Meant to say it will probably only be the mum's presents left to give out in the speeches and the photo books will be a surprise afterwards (or we may mention it when the photos come out in case they are tempted to order one for themselves!)

We've bought all the guys cufflinks and socks with 'Best Man' etc on them whiuch act as presents, which will be given to them beforehand. I've got the bridesmaids necklace & earring sets so they will be given beforehand to be worn on the day too.

We also got an engraved pint glass for the best man which the groom will give during his speech, and the mother's bouquets, which he will also give.

Do it however you want, and however you feel comfortable! xx

I think tradition says dads don't get a gift, but we will be getting gifts for the dads, as both our parents have contributed a lot to the wedding, and it would seem a bit mean not to show our appreciation to the dads as well!