I posted a couple of weeks ago about my dad blowing up and causing a massive scene at a meal out over a jug of gravy which cost £1 (something he does very regularly) my H2B was aware of how he is but this time he got to see it first hand and he has been very clear with me that he does NOT want my dad to pay for or have any involvement in our wedding particularly the venue/reception so he can't kick off on the day or be rude to people.
Since we got engaged last month my dad has already said a number of times about how he will be paying for it, and making jokey messages about how he'll have to save up now we are engaged (he doesn't need to save up, money is just a thing he jokes about a lot - another thing which annoys my H2B how he acts like he has no money and it's a hardship for him)
Anyway we have already booked our venue and paid the £500 deposit before I even got my engagement ring (we do things very backwards) but my parents don't know. I have done it this way as I just want to do my own thing with very little to no involvement from external sources.
I need to obviously tell my parents that we are getting married on the 10th June 2023 and am going to tell them that we have already paid for the whole venue (something to do with they gave us this years price so saved £700 or something like that)
I just know he will be offended when I tell him. I am hoping to soften the blow and say I would much prefer him to buy my dress & maybe the photographer you know the things we can keep and look back on rather than just paying for everyone to eat and drink if he absolutely insists on contributing. I'm hoping he accepts this.
I feel stuck between a rock and a hard place as only 2 days after being engaged my dad was brought up in conversation with my H2B and him being adamant that he wants my dad to have no involvement in the venue which caused a bit of upset and I was left in the toilet of a restaurant crying because I feel like the enjoyment is already ruined.
I'm struggling to get excited about being engaged / getting married until I tell my dad we have already booked it and don't need any help with money. I am thinking of using the following reasons to help my case
1. My partner has been married once so we are not asking / expecting his parents to contribute (as they paid for some of his first wedding) so don't want my parents to contribute
2. We got a £700 discount for paying the venue now to get this years price rather than 2023 price
Sorry for the long winded post, if you knew my dad you would understand why I am so hept up and nervous over the whole thing. I am going to see him next Monday so will have to tackle this then.
