Weddings

Don't bother with her. Don't let yourself be surrounded by negativity. I've just had to cut off a 'good' friend because I felt that she was playing games.

I think you need to have an honest conversation with her. Tell her you feel like she is not showing interest and it hurts you that she ignores your messages as you just wan her to share your special day as your best friend. Explain that whilst you want her as part of your day, if she doesn't want to do it you understand but would rather she says so now. It will be a difficult convo but you don't know what else she may have going on that is making her withdraw. At least you will know where you stand and can then decide to cut her now if needed, as I agree with Lea, you don't need the negativity.

Maybe she cant afford to be apart of the wedding , are you paying for dress shoes , hair and make up ?

if you are, have you told her , if you haven't then sit down with her and ask her

maybe she is having financial problems or she may feel uneasy telling you as I'm sure there more costs with hen night gifts etc

personally I would just nip it in bud its supposed to be your happiest day , there's other things to be investing your thoughts in than worrying over things out of your control

When you say she's 'ignoring' you, what do you mean? Is she not responding when you speak to her in person or over the phone or has she not responded to texts? If she's not replied to texts, it may just be that she hasn't realised you expect a response.

If she's been a good friend up until now, I would give her the benefit of the doubt and not assume she's being difficult until you've had a conversation with her. And don't forget that while your wedding is a huge event for you, it's not going to be quite as important for anyone else, and it's still a very long way away. Good friends will be happy to celebrate with you in August 2024, but even your bridesmaid doesn't need to be spending a lot of time thinking and talking about your wedding 17 months in advance.

I think you need to sit down and have a chat she might be having problems that she feels like she can't talk about it and if that doesn't work then cut all ties with her x♥️

Talk to her and voice your concerns. She might be going through something or it could be jealousy. Yes the conversation might be awkward however, it could save you money and heartache later down the line. It could be something, or nothing, but you won't find out unless you ask her as the rest of us online are all speculating and don't know the full story. Hope it all works out!

Ladies I am really struggling 😫 she isn't coming to my engagement party but I've also noticed she's making mental health excuses up for attention. Latest one was slitting her neck. I suffer from mental health and depression myself and its really fucking my head up mentally and emotionally 😢

View quoted message It is your day and you cannot focus on your friends negativity. You'll be surprised at who is for you and not so much when it comes to your wedding. If she can't go then let it be. The day is about you and your partner not her xx

View quoted message Thank you Robert that makes a lot of sense! Xx

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Lauren someone slitting their neck is not normal. You say she’s doing it for attention but even if she is, that in itself indicates that she is not well. Having mental health issues yourself doesn’t mean hers are less real than yours: imagine how you would feel if someone said you were having mental health issues for attention.

You have plenty of time until the wedding: I would suggest you focus on getting yourself in a healthier headspace and allow her to do the same. Then when you are well enough, get back to wedding planning with the support of your fiancé, and if she isn’t well enough to cope with being a bridesmaid at that point then you will be in a better position to make a decision that is right for you.

View quoted message She's been like this for the past 9 yrs but doesn't take anyone's help or even help herself? I have tried supporting her and standing by her the most possible way a friend can but that isn't someone anyone should have to be carrying around on their shoulders when your hearing about attempts at least 3 weeks then when u try talking to her about it she laughs like its a laughing matter. It's serious stuff n I can't be apart of it anymore

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That is absolutely understandable: you aren’t responsible for her mental health issues. What I’m suggesting is you separate her health from your wedding. Focus on getting yourself in a healthier headspace: wedding planning is always stressful, but it ebbs and flows. With well over a year to go, you should also have lots of periods of calm as well. Focus on you, find enjoyment in the planning with your fiancé, and if she can’t cope with being a bridesmaid, then if you are feeling healthier you’ll be better able to deal with that.

Could have said it better than Sarah my niec

Niece has mental health problems it affects us in so many different ways but I think you need to focus on your planning and concentrate on your health and see what happens in the future with your friend x♥️