Your opinions on having a children's table

I'm not allowed crayons or colouring pencils at the venue at all, so the only thing i can give my flower girl os a disposable camera...... ☹️

I would be nervous about having a childrens table......... but obviously if you know the kids will behave then i dont see why not!!

at least they wont be bored!!

I would say it depends on how far you can trust the children to behave. We are (most likely, depending on further seating plan drama!) having a children's table with between six and eight children aged 4 - 9; 2 of those children are my sons, 3 are my h2b's cousin's children and the rest are friends. Fortunately we know all the children very well and know they will behave fantastically, but if I had even the slightest doubt over their behaviour, I wouldn't chance it. From my experience with kids, naughtiness is infectious, and once one gets going, they all catch on! I love kids and am really looking forward to them all running about and playing, but I don't want to have the parents of the other kids to be constantly anxious about behaviour and to feel like they're on guard. It would just ruin everyone's fun.

Also, are you planning on having speeches? If so, I really recommend making sure there's something else for the kids to do. If I was a small child, I would find it very difficult to sit nicely and listen to a bunch of grown-ups drone on. I find it hard enough as an adult myself!! Without parents sitting next to them shushing them, they could get reeeeaally bored.

Hope that's helpful!

Heya!

Were not having a childrens table as such but we are having a 'teenagers table'!!! swaping the wine on the table for WKD/smirnoff. Figured theyd prefer to sit abnd talk with each other rather tahn be stuck with the adults.

xx

All the older children we have (14 and up) all love sitting with the adults and joining in on the conversation. But the kids aged 5 - 11 are quite close; my son, step-son, niece, cousin, and best-mans 2 children.. there are two girls the same age as my son who know my son but don't know each other.. iykwim? They're all pretty well behaved children. Their parents would be sat literally right behind them or right next to them on the next table. Has anyone ever been to a wedding where they had a childrens table? How did it go? My venue is on a patio so crayons, pencils, etc are allowed. Just wondered what other things they could do.. not sure the 11 year olds would really dig the colouring that much.

I have done a few but I have been coordinating on the day so looked after the kids for the parents!The kids loved it, we served them their meals & then sat with them colouring & sticking while the speeches were on.

Out of 33 of us for the wedding breakfast 8 of them are kids. Youngest is 6 months and the rest range between 4 and nearly 9. I'm sitting them all with their parents (it was suggested to me that I seat them all at one table and I have to say I had to work really hard at not saying 'are you mental??!') it's not that they're not good kids overall but left on their own there'd be more food down them than in their mouths and they'd be up and down at their parents all the time anyway.

If my wedding was a bit bigger I think I'd have done some all adult tables and then some 'family tables' ie couples with kids on tables together and then those without kids on different tables if that makes sense??

We've bought activity pack favours for the kids to open when they get bored, we'll also have plenty of colouring sheets on the go (I'm thinking weddingy ones for the girls and probably monsterish ones for the boys) so they shouldn't get bored during the meal. I'll also have some more activity sheets at the evening reception (3rd venue of the day, phew!) but they all like dancing so they'll probably not even need them they'll be too busy having fun and putting all the adults to shame!

Oh and in answer to your q about age ranges, I'd have an activity aimed at the 5 & 6 y/o's and then a more 'grown up' one for the older ones - maybe wordsearches and puzzles?

We have 13 kids coming age from 2weeks (if she comes on time) to 15 there is 5 boys on Oh side that are realy close and so we will sit them together and let there mums (sisters) sit with each outher but the outhers on my side will be with there mums and dads and my 2 will be on the top table with us hoping that my LO will sit still

I think if you know them all quite well and can have the kids table near someone who knows them all (so can tell them to Shhh or whatever else they might need telling) then it could work.

It's a no-go for us as we have about 20 kids - Of the ones I know I wouldn't want to leave them unattended - my niece is 4 and would need her dinner cutting up for example which would be un-convinient for the parents having to leave their own table to attend to them.

Then there are OHs friends kids, who I've not met before, so again, can't judge how they would behave.

I think aged around ages 9-13 would work well (from looking at my relatives) but not younger, and certainly not any older.

We currently have 17 under 16's there for the evening (where speeches etc will be) and 5 for the wedding breakfast (basically just a meal for close family and friends), which aren't necessarily "children" but are legally.

The children will simply sit with their parents, and it is their responsibility to keep them quiet and entertained, or take them outside immediately they begin making a fuss.

Weddings are not by nature child friendly events (and it's only in modern times that the thought of having your own children is common by the time you get married anyway), and I don't see why we should have the extra expense of paying to entertain other people's children when we're already paying out for food, drink and other entertainment for everyone.

If you don't think your children can behave themselves, then please make other arrangements for them to be looked after for one day. You've got plenty of notice to arrange this.

Brutal perhaps but it's our big day and it will be the way we want it, not tailored around other people's offspring.

We are having a childrens table BUT have hired 3 nannies to look after them for the day. They range between 9 months and 10 years (most under 5) so it wouldn't be an option for us to leave them unattended and the venue specifically told us they don't allow children only tables without adult supervision due to issues they have encountered in the past! I guess it depends on how much the children at the wedding can be trusted to be left...

I think it depends on your opinion/view of how the kids should behave too.

Reading AJs post he seems to be saying he expects them to act as adults would and to be removed if they don't - wheras we want our wedding to be about us, and we adore our 2 nieces, nephew and god-daughter. So much so that if they want to have a little chat in church, i'd happily accept that - I don't expect them to be quiet and watch the service - my niece will keep saying "Auntie K, your a princess" as she thinks a bride is a Disney princess! haha and my god-daughter probably will cry, and i'm fine with that.

Same for the reception - the kids will be VERY happy and hyper (although I have requested sugar free juice be available - haha). So again, i'm not expecting them be little angels and "be seen but not heard" etc.

We're having four children at our wedding - our two children and our two nephews.

I love all my friend's and family's children individually, but I feel that if they were at my wedding in a group I would get annoyed by them. ?

If I were to have lots of children, there is no way in hell I would have a children's table - they would end up driving me insane.

So is your son going to be at the wedding?

TBH I find AJ's views a little harsh but then I'm a big believer in how will kids learn to behave in that sort of setting if they're not exposed to it as often as they can be?

If I didn't want the children there of course I might resent the slight extra expense of having to entertain them (although it does balance out when you think that we'll pay less than half the price of an adult meal for theirs)

I love my niece and nephews, and OH niece and nephew. BM has 4 kids so we felt it was a good idea to invite them too (especially as kids tend to entertain each other) but they're only bringing 3 of them because they feel one of them would be too much of a handful - totally their choice uninfluenced by us. There was never any question that the kids wouldn't be invited (and not just because their parents have to travel so far to share our day)

@ Caweena - when I met OH my niece was only 1 and as she isn't my brothers LO i'd had little to do with her, his nephew was 7months and his niece 1 and half - I have to say, I had the same kind of view of AJ. I'm not ashamed to admit I was the woman who would be giving other moms the evils in Boots when their kids were screaming and I was trying to relax on my lunch break!

Now 2 years on, I feel totally different. My niece and nephew mean the world to me - I couldn't imagine not having them as FGs - they'd be totally gutted to miss out as they totally understand what's happening. My niece is 3 and half now and came into my room the other day and I said "I am going to wear a pretty dress for your wedding" and I said "Aw yes you are, you'll be a princess" - she said "I already have lots, lets pick one" - bless her! I can't take that away from her.

I wouldn't get married without my Mom / Brother / Dad etc and I feel the same about the kids at our day - I don't expect everyone to feel the same, and certainly not judging anyone, sheesh being a mother is hard (as far as I can see!) and you deserve one day off. It's just not for me.

How old is he then?

We have potentially 16 children coming our wedding ranging from 2 through to 16, mostly 2-4 year olds and tweenagers. I'm going to sit them with their parents and provide activity packs for them at their place settings then I've also been thinking about setting up a lounge for the older ones, couple of beanbags, some board games and maybe handheld consoles etc - but I don't think I'll bother with a children's table as many of them don't know each other and there's a couple of unruly ones and fussy eaters who would be better off sitting with their parents anyway. However if you can trust them to behave and they know each other, then go for it - I think the age range you've mentioned would be ok especially if the 9 and 11 year olds are the responsible sort.

I am having a childrens table. My OH has 2 boys of his own aged 7 and 10. I have my bestfriends two daughters as BM and they are 7 and 11. My OH has a neice who is 10 and will also be a BM and he also has 2 nephews aged around 13 and 10 and my cousin is 11. He also has 2 nephews aged 3 and 1 who will be sat with their parents as I think that is too young to be on their own table although have a feeling the 3 yo might want to sit with the big boys especially as 2 are his older brothers and in which case he can choose.

Before I met my OH in my head was a childfree wedding when you daydream about them! I was also a lot younger then and no one had kids! I am a bit older and although I don't have any of my own yet my OH does and I really wouldn't want them to be excluded.

For me a wedding is about fun and laughter and kids can often bring a lot of that to a room. I will be providing them some fun things to do at the table and will say they are welcome to bring their psp's or DS's as the speeches are the only bit I can envisage them getting bored.

I would say all the children know how to behave and eat out at restaurants with their parents. I think they will have a great time on their table!

I have about 18 children coming to our wedding and wanted to do 2 childrens tables 1 older 1 younger, until it dawned on me. I personally didnt want children back and forth back and forth between them and their parents when there is hot food being served at the tables and when the speeches are on. then the parents up every 5 minutes to check on them and shouting across the room so i decided leave them to dine with their respective parents until the speeches are over then we have a room joined to our reception room which we will put colouring books, pens, games, sweets, activity boxes etc for them to occupy themselves (with a nursery nurse supervising who only asked for £30 to do it but were paying £50 covering her travel and feeding her etc). by the time they are bored with that it'll be evening guest arrival and music will start and let the dancing commence.

But thats just what I am doing. each to their own!

There'll only be one child at our wedding, and that's only because OH's sister is due in June so he'll be about 9 months old for it - I think he'll be there through the day and then his grandparents (OH's BIL's parents, not his own lol) will take him away to let SIL2B and BIL2B let their hair down.

Other than that it's completely child free, I've never wanted children of my own so don't want them there - they're not important to me, and most of the people I know who have children and know about my rule have been relieved that they'll get a day off, most are booking a hotel too so they get a little break.

Just another one of those little details that makes us and our weddings different ?

Our wedding will be different to yours. Nothing wrong with that.

I just don't think it's unreasonable to expect parents to actually be parents and keep their children entertained and under control at your event, that's all.

For you, it may be about generations coming together. For us, it's a public celebration of our love with our family and friends, most of whom don't have children to bring, and those that do, they're like children of work colleagues coming to the evening but we've never actually met the children or I guess particularly have a desire to.

There are many ways to have fun. Filling yourself with silly quantities of alcohol isn't one of them - but hopefully that's at least one thing that the children won't be doing...

I don't share views about childless weddings with those having them, but I do respect the old adage of "your day, your way". Personally the children are a huge part of our wedding mainly because we have 3 of the little buggers ourselves! We're really looking forward to seeing them all running about and playing together, and I don't mind one bit if they're chattering during the ceremony and speeches and racing around during dinner. My day to day life is filled with noisy kids. My wedding will reflect that and I'm very happy with it. I also imagine it's some couples' idea of HELL! lol

We have a fair few kids coming but have decided against a kids table. Mainly because I am worried about the lack of supervision. I think it is all well and good if you have someone there watching over them, but we wouldn't. For us, it will be easier to have them sitting with their parents.

I would deffo do it for teenagers, but I am talking children here! I can just see the squabbles...

Maybe it is because we don't have children yet - at our age that is quite unusual, of course, but that's just the circumstances that we've been through to get to this point; once we're married we will be looking at starting a family of course. Therefore we aren't used to, as you put it, "the day to day life filled with noisy kids".

I'm amazed by people not having their own children at their big day. I couldn't imagine not having our daughter share it with us. I have not been to that many weddings where there have been children but the B&G have been childless. It's the ones who already had children that invited more. I never saw them misbehaving/causing problems or looking bored. We have arranged a lot of inexpensive entertainment for them and I guess if the youngest ones do start to cry during the speeches, the nannies are on hand to remove them until they are quiet again.

We don't have children and won't be having any in the future (not going into that one) but there was never any question that we wouldn't have any kids with us on our day.

To be honest kids tend to make less noise than the adults anyway - we had a wedding in the hotel I work in today and the only issue we had with the kids was that the wee one, about a year old, kept on wandering around the hotel into the bar and reception areas. Not a problem for us so much, but we did wonder why all the adults failed to notice him disappearing time after time? We were tempted to suggest reins lol

I've only been at a couple of child-free weddings and well, one of them worked and was a really lovely day but the other seemed really strained and empty feeling IYKWIM? Maybe because the majority of guests were worrying about their kids with the babysitters lol

Between us, me and H2B have 4 children aged 2, 6, 11 and 16.. the day wouldn't be the same without them. The only other children there will be children who are friends or family to our children, so they will almost all know each other. We literally have just a very small wedding, 50 guests in total with 18 children but only 7 of those will actually be old enough to sit on their own. The children's table will be situated next to all the others tables.. there will be 6 round tables and the top table is included in that. Here's how the tables will be;

Table 2 will be the children's table, so within reach of everyone.. there will only be 4 sets of parents who will have children at that table and we will work it out so that they are seated close to the childrens table. We're having a really comfortable non-formal wedding on a patio.. it's going to be a BBQ.. we don't mind if children want to get up and run around during the meal.. it's all part and parcel of having children.. I know each one of my guests feels the same way too as they all have children. There is a grass area just down some steps from the patio which the children will be allowed to use to play games on, etc.. as long as they eat something and are happy, they can get down and do what they want. I'm totally relaxed about that stuff but i can understand why some people aren't as comfortable with it. I just think as all the kids age 5-11 are pretty much friends anyway, they'll be playing and talking to one another all day and night. I'm the total opposite to some here. I would be so bored at my wedding if I couldn't see or hear children having fun and dancing about. But then, I am a bit of a child myself and so is H2B ?

Table 1 is top table if you didn't work that one out. Sorry about the randomly placed table numbers... I just quickly made that.. lol

Im totally with you on this (sounds like the same situation we are in)

It never crossed my mind not to have all the children in my life at the wedding, I have hired a bouncey castle (although this is adult proof too!!?) and garden games and at the moment having great fun putting together all the gift/activity bags together for all 17 children attending!!

I have seated a lot of the older children together (ages 8 to 13) and have taken inspiration from Sherrie's pics and hoping to come up with something similar. I have also asked the parents how they feel about their children sitting on their own table and most have said its a great idea! I know all of the children/young people well though and know that they are all well behaved but in saying that I dont want them to feel that they have to 'seen and not heard'!!

I am hoping for more relaxed and perhaps to some rowdy wedding breakfast with lots of laughter and enjoyment.

I also have asked the parents how they feel and os far, 3 out of the 4 have said they LOVE the idea and have thanked me for letting the kids sit together so they don't get bored as they'll most likely end up going to each others tables to talk to or play with one another.. as most know each other. It just seems to make sense. Even my Mum thinks its a fabulous idea so I think I'm gonna go with it. Its an outdoors wedding.. so I'm thinking.. colouring.. bubbles.. sweets... and what else? Anyone got any ideas?

The other set of parents haven't replied to me yet!

Large garden games?? Im having giant Jenga, darts, bowls etc. And ocourse the bouncy castle lol

Ive seen lots of ball type games in the £1 shop. so probably going to get a couple of those too