June & July 2021 Brides - How Are You Coping?

After Boris announcement yesterday my venue has come back stating that in order to accommodate social distancing we can only have 30 guests on my 10th July wedding.


Gutted is an understatement- I was finally getting excited about my postponed date and now I wish we’d just picked a registry. Really not looking forward to explaining to guests that although there are “no restrictions on guests” they can’t come because of social distancing…. Most of us live in London so if I had a reception on the tube, at Wimbledon or Wembley stadium that would be fine though 🤬. Is it possible to be angry and devastated in equal measure?

Its got be be so infuriating for all the couples when everyone keeps saying "oh you are unlimited numbers now" but then totally forgetting that its still social distance rules. Even I'm getting it now "back to normal then now Bill " --- no it flippin ain't

Looking at the numbers roughly speaking its 1/4 capacity so that is every venue that can have 120 or so in normal times can still only have 30. 120 capacity in my experience would describe 90% of venues.

What about this idea. Some civil ceremony venues with a separate ceremony room will have a separate room for the wedding breakfast that is much bigger. Perhaps in some of your cases you could invite 70 (or whatever) but only 28 will be allowed into the ceremony room. The rest can great you when you emerge 20 mins later.

View quoted message Great idea Bill

View quoted message 😫 how much did u originally have hun.
Seeing my venue tomorrow so will be finding out how many we can have socially distance for wedding/lunch
Seeing vicar today so will ask how many can be in church.Nothing has changed for a lot of brides and once again we've had to wait for official clarification.

View quoted message See I’d love this approach, my venue has 3 ceremony rooms (one can be used for receptions) but the other rooms only allow 11 guests.. we either chance the weather and turn the vast majority of our guests away if it’s poor weather or go ahead with 11… it will be nigh on impossible to find a new venue with 4 weeks to go… I could literally cry!

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Not ideal but you could invite everyone you want but only 11 will be allowed in the ceremony and wedding breakfast. But if the weather is ok then everyone one will with you outside for what usually is 1.5 hours before the meal. They will be in all the photos you want so that part will look "normal", you could even have any speeches before the meal and do it outside so that they are a part of that too.

View quoted message We wanted 50 all day (down from 75 because of travel restrictions) . The venue comfortably held this plus has outside space so thought we’d be okay.


Now I’ve listed to the wedding task force update and it turns out all suppliers are included in whatever risk assessment the venue do so we are screwed 😢

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"Now I’ve listed to the wedding task force update and it turns out all suppliers are included in whatever risk assessment the venue do so we are screwed 😢"

Have you got a link for that as it sounds like a backward step because suppliers were not included in the numbers before- apart from at the very start of the lifting of the first lockdown.

Just looked at the Gov website and the only reference after a quick read is relating to a reception in a private garden.

Steps to take when holding an event in other venues, including a garden of a private home, on private land, or in a public outdoor place

If you’re hosting your event outdoors in your garden, on private land, or in a public outdoor place (such as a park or countryside accessible to the public) you may have up to 30 attendees (including the couple and anyone working) without conducting a risk assessment.

View quoted message Hi, this is a link to their Instagram live at 2:30pm today.


https://www.instagram.com/tv/CQJN5CWID8f/?utm_medium=copy_link

Would be great to hear your thoughts on this.Thanks

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Can you hire a marquee in the grounds?

Alternatively, I'd give your guests the option of coming and they can decide for themselves. We got married immediately post first lockdown, when guests had to file in to the church, sit on a designated seat, stay there throughout the ceremony and then file straight back out. We couldn't even offer a glass of water, never mind any food! We told everyone what it would be like because we thought most people wouldn't be interested, and they all came - some drove 3 hours to get there!

So give people the option - they may be happy to risk the weather (or even stand outside under umbrellas to cheer you on) just because they are rooting for you.

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I listened and it seems to be something the taskforce has been told but i think by the time it has been confirmed and published on the gov website it will not be the case. I do not know who they are talking to in government but it sounds to be a briefing from a junior pen pusher.

For a very short while last year it was the case that the numbers included suppliers but that did change to them not being included in the numbers.

The published guidelines on Gov website can change a number of times in one day sometimes.

I expect that suppliers will not be included in the end. Otherwise for a ceremony you will have me, two registrar's and a member of staff from the venue in the room so for a 30 capacity venue which after the bride and groom would leave only leave 24 guests.

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I feel your pain. We’re booked for 17th July and it’s so disappointing. I’m devastated this is our 3rd date! I can’t take it anymore.

We’ve have a long chat and decided to postpone, one more time. We won’t be moving it again!

I want to be able to mingle with the guests, I want there to be dancing and I don’t want to wear a mask to go to toilet after I’ve paid for my hair and make up doing.

It’s hard enough organising a family meal out with these flipping restrictions let alone organising a wedding.

Don’t make any hasty decisions but do what feels right. You deserve the wedding you and your partner have planned.

We’re getting married in 16 days and not heard from the venue with their update. They messaged on Monday before the Boris announcement and said they would be in touch when they have received the guidelines and digested it all, they will not get them till Wednesday. They understand we’re all stressed as they’re feeling it too!! Different stress tho I think! Everyone seems to have read the guidelines like we have unless each venue gets their own! Anyway 16 days is not long if you’re going to cancel. If the venue say 30 people we would probably have to move it! So frustrating I checked my emails like 467 times. Just want to know, getting so many messages ‘great news you must be really relieved’ errrm no.

View quoted message They’ve now said 36 but no need for masks inside or outside - moving in the right direction 🤞🏾. Hopefully we can get even more an keep the no masks.


Still avoiding people until they confirm

View quoted message Fingers crossed for u hun

Well we got a standard blanket email from our venue saying not to call or email them 🙄


Apparently they are doing a new risk assessment and will update their website on Thursday then contact everyone with final numbers of allowed guests!
Final payments for our catering, cake & venue decorating are due tomorrow.. and we have no idea of numbers 🤷🏾‍♀️

I feel you, I’m just 9 days to my wedding and the venue said there should not have any music or dancing at all due to government new regulations because of COVID and there is no way I want something like that. So I cancelled the wedding and I’m looking for another place to do it in just 9 days. 🥺🥺

I’m really not coping! No one seems to know what’s going on! Does anyone have any insight as to what is happening with small weddings? It seems as though all weddings are socially distanced and risk assessed soon so I fear our wedding that would currently be 30 will only be witnesses. Our local registry office has said they don’t understand what the government mean and what it means for weddings after 21st June. Any knowledge would be great. TIA x x x

View quoted message I would explain the situation and ask to delay until the weekend/Monday.


Any in house services I would say something like we’ve paid deposits for 50 and if the current 11 guest max is the number we’ve paid the majority in full so waiting until they decide before paying anything more x

View quoted message Have a read of the latest restrictions here: https://www.gov.uk/guidance/coronavirus-covid-19-wedding-and-civil-partnership-ceremonies-receptions-and-celebrations


Apparently, there will be small changes to the guidelines today. Mainly on tables not having to be socially distanced & the removal of a cap on the number of guests seated.
Guests at your wedding do not have to social distance - it’s a personal choice of the guests however, there should be room for them to distance should they want to.
Guest numbers are now based on venue size, rather than a fixed number. Essentially, on paper you could have ‘unlimited’ guests. However, the true number is decided by the venue & what they deem ‘safe’. I honestly can’t see them reducing you down to just witnesses though
Hope this helps xx

View quoted message All of our services are outside ones which makes it a little complicated when we have no idea of numbers allowed. Our ceremony & reception are in the same building but the reception is dry hire.


It’s a beautiful building and grounds. The building belongs to the council’s registry office and we all know how frustrating it can be dealing with the council 🤦🏾‍♀️

View quoted message Fingers crossed for you hun that they can increase your numbers.

I officially hate my venue!!!!

View quoted message They are being terrible. Part of me says once you are legally married do what you want. They have your money (too much given the numbers they are allowing you have) and are now taking the Micky. Sorry you are going through this - I’ve not heard of any venue behaving like this. Once you’ve had your wedding I’d leave a scathing review.

View quoted message Your venue need to be more accommodating, yes there is a serious virus going around but they are being OTT over the photographer. We had our wedding tasting at our venue on Tuesday and I asked them what their weddings were like at the moment. They said they are now not telling guests to stay at their tables if they are mingling and that when guests start dancing to the background music they just close the door and leave them to it as they don’t want to spoil the day for the bride and groom. I felt so much happier when they said this. I don’t know what things will be like for august wedding but the thought of not being able to get up and go around talking to our guests would devastate me. Hope you can get them to relax a bit and I hope you have a lovely day xx

And also they were disgusting not to tell you about the reduced numbers until after you paid. You’re not getting what you paid for so surely they could have offered you a different date or worked with you so you can have a relaxed wedding.

View quoted message Totally agree you should demand for a partial refund as they are not giving you the wedding that you paid for!
I also would have my photographer roaming taking pics . You've paid for it.
Also ask to speak to a manager about your situation as it is awful

View quoted message We have a good working relationship with our photographer and when I sent him that portion of the venue imposed rules I got a colourful reply 🤣 we’ve paid for a photographer who won’t be allowed to do his job or breaking any guidelines - it’s totally unreasonable


I can’t tell you guys how many times we heard the words ‘They’re taking the p***’ this evening from various people. Our dads are not allowed to give us away, no live music it doesn’t feel like a wedding anymore.
We’re not going to lay down and take it, we’re completely prepared to fight everything - some of our money back would be a good start.. I’m going to be on the phone constantly tomorrow until I speak to someone

View quoted message Good on you babe
I would be doing the same
The government have relaxed some things so the venue should be more accommodating.God is good u got this 🙏🏾💜

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If we are only talking about the ceremony then that actually is quite normal. In fact you do not want your photographer becoming a distraction, and if they are then the registrar will soon halt the proceedings and tell them off, marring your ceremony and giving the photographer a negative mark in that registrars mind for the next time they cross paths.

For the ceremony the allocated place is usually to the side of the registrar and they shouldn't mind them stepping to the centreline for a shot of you walking up the isle where they can also get the groom in the shot as well.

Then everything else can be done form the side position without the need to move around.

So for the ceremony an allocated spot should not have too much an impact on the photography. Unless it is a really crap/ stupid spot, in which case it helps if the last time you have seen that registrar you have been well behaved !

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Might be worth making sure your venue know about this, the areas that can be included in the capacity.

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Venue capacity in COVID-secure venues

As part of the duty on venue managers and organisers to limit health and safety risks, a safe capacity for the venue should be established.

This number should enable members of staff, anyone conducting or supporting the event, and customers or guests (including children) to be socially distanced within the venue. Space in communal areas like waiting areas and corridors should be considered when setting the safe maximum number of attendees.

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And as I suggested the first new guidance that said it included anyone working, was a junior pen pushers mistake and has now been corrected to - not including anyone working.--- here .

Steps to take when holding an event in other venues, including a garden of a private home, on private land, or in a public outdoor place

It’s a legal requirement for a COVID-19 risk assessment to be completed for these events, except for events taking place outdoors where there will be 30 attendees or less.

If you’re hosting your event outdoors in your garden, on private land, or in a public outdoor place (such as a park or countryside accessible to the public) you may have up to 30 attendees (including the couple, but not including anyone working) without conducting a risk assessment.