Things you secretly (or not so secretly) hate about weddings - Take 2

HAHAHA i love sweetheart tables and chocolate fountains...i'm off to cry now ?

ok meeee....i hate

paper confetti, money poems, tacky hen nights, recieving lines, party music like the macarena and saturday night (dear oh dear not at my wedding), balloons

funny topic zippy!!!

Yup defo hate willy stuff on hen nights - in fact we could have a whole other thread for that LOL

I hate:

Table diamonds, bloody favours (though having them..), the excess of pink girliness that generally surrounds wedding crap, money poems, fireworks, horse + carriages, anything *lucky*....

And isn;t a choc fountain dangerous near a big white dress

PS sorry to anyone who has these things, not intended to offend

Haha...I need to add them to my list too.....there will be no chacha slide or oops upside your head at our wedding !

Cheap coloured confetti, white stockings/tights, receiving lines, wishing wells, money poems,gift lists in the invitations, the wedding march, men that use "on behalf of my wife and I" as the first line of the speech

I remember the last post like this it was so much fun to read and went on for agggesss!

Ok so I hate (apologies in advance!):

yes agree with the willies, strippers, cowboy hats, L plates, veils etc on hen nights

cheesy wedding choons (have mailed the band to say i don't want them to play Build me up Buttercup *slight bridezilla moment*)

guest list drama

Keeping the colour/theme a secret - I don't do well with secrets

People who keep asking 'so how are the plans coming along' when they are obviously not interested

sure there are more ........

Cheska - soooooooooooo agree with you about people asking about the planning LOL, I always want to go into detail about table diamonds or something just to teach them a lesson.

Yes *Come On Eileen* is B-A-N-N-E-D arghhhhhh

When I say cheese I mean like Abba, Madonna, Eighties stuff, motown and a bit of rock for me!

Ooh just thought of another,

brides who are late on purpose because they think they are meant to be. Waited 30 mins once the vicar nearly called it off as they thought she wasn't coming!

Didn't see the last thread as wasn't here i don't think.

So i hate...

totally drunk OTT hen nights complete with L plates and plastic willies

reallly cheesy music at weddings, there will be no macarena or saturday night at our wedding!

people who criticise what they deem to be non-traditional therefore wrong in their opinions

the OTT pinkness associated with weddings - i know i want some pink and so it sounds hypocritical but at least put it with another colour and not all baby pinks! its just too feminine for me, when a wedding is supposed to be about the man aswell!

Hope i haven't offended anyone!

Oh I love this… right, how long have you got?!

I secretly hate;

- Sweetie tables – sorry just don’t understand what they are for?

- Hen night crudeness.

- That people do things for their wedding they would never do “IRL” – false nails/hair extensions etc..

- Releasing doves or similar.

I’m off to think of loads more now…

My H2B has a pet hate about weddings - brides who have their hair curled and a fake tan and false nails for their wedding day when IRL they never ever curl their hair or have fake tan or fake nails. He made me promise quite early on in our planning that he would recognise me on our wedding day!

I hate: chocolate fountains, money poems, big gaps in between day and evening receptions, crystal bouquets, favours, 'vintage' wedding cars, receiving lines, top hats, back fat from too tight wedding dresses - just buy a bigger size!

EXACTLY! You might be a bride love but you're still YOU!

Hating all the other bits you said too...

This is such a theraputic thread.

Ali rubs hands in glee - stretches her fingers and prepares to type a LONG list!!!

(No offence to anyone - this just applies to my wedding!)

Garters? Why? Soooo tacky!

Bridesmaids. What is the point of them?

Sweetheart tables.

Chair covers.

Those sashes over chair covers.

A-line strapless dresses. (They're lovely - but it does seem to me that everyone ends up looking the same. Plus probably just jealous as I haven't got enough boobage to hold anything strapless up!!)

Speeches which last longer than five minutes.

First dance choreographed dances.

Fussy cakes.

Those really awful mother of the bride outfits: Like these....

Money poems. If you want cash - just ask nicely!

Noisy children running riot.

Tables where everyone is split up from people they know.

Throwing the bouquet - I want to hang onto it for as long as possible!

Not cutting the top tier of the cake.

I'm sure there are more.

Gosh, I'm grumpy this morning! Must be my hormones!!!

LOL!

Ali x

(as I said - no offence to anyone - we're all different!)

People who only diet for the wedding but forget about doing it after!

Gaps in between the day and evening do. Your guests WILL be bored.

Big dresses.

Pets at weddings (like they care).

People putting just wine on the tables. Not everyone drinks wine (it was actually cheaper for our guests to order from the bar and have the drink they wanted).

Only Roses in a bouquet.

The bride doing a speech (don't ask me why).

People who care to much about what others think/want to do.

People who hate Children at weddings but invite their Uncle/Cousin/Mum/Dad/Brother/Friend who is going to get pissed up and cause a scene anyway.

*Backs away from the thread*

Ooooh i've never done one of these before =)

before i start, what's a money poem? people seem to hate them but i've never heard of them before.

I hate.......

worrying my wedding wont reflect me and my partner

pink weddings, i'm not a girly girl at all

people asking about things i'm planning then not really listening

cheesy music and the pressure to dance, if i dont want to dance then i dont want to dance

standing around waiting for ages between the wedding and the meal, or the meal and evening reception

every man and his dog wanting to be my bridesmaid, so hard to find a polite way to say no without hurting their feelings, just end up laughing awkwardly and walking away

Good thread! Things I hate about weddings:

Interfering families who question why you haven't invited their second cousin twice removed who you haven't seen in 10 years

General invitation politics...e.g. "if we invite X we have to invite Y" and so on...I'm sure it won't be the end of the world for them to miss our wedding day or just get an evening invitation!!! grr

Balloon decorations

Over co-ordination, e.g. matching absolutely everything with your colour scheme down to your underwear, wallpaper, dinner ?

Couples who take dance lessons to do a routine for their first dance (sorry as I know a lot of people on here do this, nothing personal just find it a little bit cheesy! just my opinion)

Money poems

Another vote for cheesy wedding songs - namely the Grease medley, YMCA, Celebration, Build me up Buttercup, macarena and many many more ?

Releasing doves (another vote)

The idea of spending thousands of pounds on a wedding dress because it's "the one" - there are loads of beautiful dresses you can get for £500 and well under!

Having a wedding party overload, e.g. 8 bridesmaids, 5 flower girls, 3 best men, 10 ushers, etc etc!

General bridezilla-ness, e.g. expecting bridesmaids to give up their own lives to rush around after you and your wedding plans (hopefully I won't transform into this!!)

That's all that immediately springs to mind. I actually quite like the idea of a receiving line, and am up for a rowdy hen night although will draw the line at dressing up and any willy themed paraphenalia ? ?

Oh yes, I forgot about the whole receiving line thing.

Waste of time and as my fiance said: think of all the germs!!!!!

Bless - I don't think he realises he'll be kissing people and shaking hands all day!

People who have church weddings because they look "pretty" or something similar, rather than because of religious beliefs.

People who want the biggest and best of everything, and adopt the "look at me, look at me" attitude, when all the day is really about is you and your h2b saying your vows.

inviting hundreds of people you dont really know or care about, "just because"

wedding gowns. yeah, they look pretty but i just dont dont like them. not quite sure why.

personalised napkins. WHY???? you only wipe your mouth on them, totally pointless.

gift lists/money poems etc. if people want to get you a gift or give you money, then that is up to them, asking for them is just a bit off for my liking.

bridesmaids. why do you need a group of girls in pretty dresses standing there doing nothing.

people who do things to please other people, like inviting someone you really dont like etc. its your day so do what you want.

there are loads more, but im going to come across as even more anti weddingy type stuff. basically, i dont like the typical "traditions", which make all weddings the same, rather than more personal to you and your h2b. each to their own etc, but i know a lot of my friends had the big weddings, even though it wasn't "them" just to please other people, when really what they would have prefered was to go somewhere, just the 2 of them. thats what is important afterall.

? - classic, totally agree!!!

Oooh.... great thread..... where do I start?

1. Dove releases/ butterfly releases (the butterflies get frozen and start to defrost in time for you to open and then they fly away.... WTF is all that about?!?!?)
2. Barbie lookalikes.... or those wanting to look like a disney princess
3. chav weddings (ooh... controversial!)
4. receiving lines.... way too many family politics for those shenanigans
5. people trying to be more than they are... agree with the hitchers who said fake hair/nails/tans but also others that wear top hats "just because it's a wedding" ...and those who have harpist/string quartet playing classical music because that's whats expected of them but wouldn't listen to this type of music normally... IMO the wedding should reflect you and H2B IRL.
6. too much structured, lengthy photographs with your 3rd cousin twice removed....
7. Badly behaved children
8. Couples who think they're Fred & Ginger on their first dance.... I've not yet seen a couple who can carry this off (but secretly love the original dirty dancing one).... and don't get me started on those that start off with a slow dance and then have that fake music break as if the DJ has screwed up, and then go into a routine.... it's been done to death and is not funny anymore!!

.....and relax.....

?

Ho ho, I love these types of threads! So, things I dislike/hate/didn't do

First dance - choreographed or not - they are all naff

people getting their knickers in a knot about matching the invite with their nail polish (or whatever - no one will notice)

chair covers (naffy naff naff)

receiving line (dull)

people having to pay for their own drinks (firm believer in we have invited them as a guest - you wouldn't make people buy their own drink if you invited them over for dinner)

favours (why bother? Most of them get left behind & no one cares)

being 'given away' - I am no one's to give away. My dad doesn't own me, I've not lived at home for over 15 years, why should I be given away?

chocolate fountains (although I did have toasted marshmallows on an open fire - that was probably naff too!)

wearing a veil (waste of good money - why bother? It would only hide my lovely hair!)

I had a fantastic day BTW and am so glad I didn't get hung up on the tiny details. No one really cares, and you won't even notice them in the long run...

This is a great thread, so many things, so little time...

1: Money poems, pointless and usually twee and badly written with the most basic ABAB rhyming scheme, like the poems you use to write in primary school (can you tell I really really don't like them)

2: Yes, fake tan and nail extensions coz there's this feeling that you have to look uber-girly on your wedding day.

3: Releasing doves/anything, why just why?

4: receiving lines.

5: Men only speeches, I don't give a hoot for tradition, it's my day as well and if I want to give a speech then I will.

6: Favours, some can be quite nice i'm sure but most of the time the guests don't bother to take them home and you have to wrap a billion tiny chocolates for people who are largely there for the food, alcohol and dancing.

7: Churches when you are not religious.

8: The whole mystique surrounding the dress, my H2B has seen mine, he's not seen me in it coz I do want that to be a surprise but I did want to know whether he actually liked the bloody thing.

And breathe...

? i actually think that's quite cute ? but i haaaaate weddings when the bride does a speech and starts with the line 'you can't shut me up any other day, why should be wedding day be any different!'

so cheesy, and obviously taken straight off an internet wedding speech suggestion page

Oh I so agree with the churches thing! It would be so hypocritical of me to get hitched in a church! I have been to many church weddings but only one where both the bride and groom were committed christians and it was lovely because you knew that it really meant something to them!

Oh and speeches off the internet!!! Aaarrrggghhh!

Following on from there when the groom is reading his speech and talking about his wife and says "She is beautiful, clever......and what else was it? I can't quite read her writing!" It's been done enough already.

Receiving lines. As a guest I HATE them, being forced to shake hands with the parents who, if you know them, you've already spoken to, and if you don't it's awkward. MIL made a snidey comment when we said we were only having H and I in one, but we did it anyway.

Too long speeches. 10 minutes each, tops!

People who get offended because their children's children were not invited to the wedding, when the B&G never see them, let alone their children or children's children! (IYSWIM!!)

'you can't shut me up any other day, why should be wedding day be any different!' - I have never been to a wedding where this has been done but I am cringe at just the thought of it

1. Any animal releases

2. Doing anything because its the 'done' thing.

3. Poems of any kind

4. Tacky Hen nights

5. Tacky stag nights

6. Speeches

7. First dances

8. People who have church weddings for the photos rather than because of religious beliefs.

9. Recieving lines

'you can't shut me up any other day, why should be wedding day be any different!' - I have never been to a wedding where this has been done but I am cringe at just the thought of it

1. Any animal releases

2. Doing anything because its the 'done' thing.

3. Poems of any kind

4. Tacky Hen nights

5. Tacky stag nights

6. Speeches

7. First dances

8. People who have church weddings for the photos rather than because of religious beliefs.

9. Recieving lines

Nothing

God where do I started!

Having every member of the family involved in the day.

Everything matching. Why why why you don't have everything matching in life so why dress everyone in the same outfits!

Receiving lines

Spending a fortune on unnecessary luxuries

Why buy presents for every member of the wedding party

A drunk bride and groom

Embarrassing speeeches about how you pee'd your pants when you were 4 or something!

There are heaps more but I can't think of them all!

Examples of money poems:

So what do you get
For the bride and groom
Whose house needs things
In every room?
When shopping for a present please don’t be rash
As there is always the option
To just give cash!
We hope you don’t find
Our request to be funny
But we really would appreciate
A gift of money

We’ve been together for a few years now;
We have pots and pans and linen and towels;
We have glasses and toasters, really quite a few;
So instead of more gifts, we suggest this to you;
If it doesn’t offend and it won’t send you running;
What we would really appreciate is quite simply money;
We know choosing gifts can be such a pain;
And this way there is no chance of bringing the same

Now we are to be Mr & Mrs
We don’t need a wedding list of dishes
We have two kettles, two toasters, two microwaves
We require a house for which we have to save.
If you would like to give us a gift,
A cheque or vouchers would give us a lift
We like to think of it as our ‘wishing well’
Which will be filled with your love, we can tell.

To save you looking, shopping or buying.
Here is an idea, we hope you like trying.
Come to our wedding, to wish us both well.
And bring this small sack, to throw in our wishing well.
Fill it with paper all colours will do, gold is our favourite but silver will do.
Now that we have saved you, all that fuss.
We hope you will come, and celebrate with us.

To save you looking, shopping or buying.
Here is an idea, we hope you like trying!
Come to our wedding, to wish us both well.
And make some use of our little wishing well.
Just put some money into a card,
Now make a wish…..see that wasn’t hard!
Now that we have saved you, all that fuss.
We hope you will come, and celebrate with us.
Please don’t be offended at this type of request,
As our day will be complete having you as our guest.

We don’t want to offend but we have it all,
All household goods and so much more.
To save you shopping, sit back and rest,
A gift of currency is our request.
Don’t go overboard or rob any banks,
Any little thing will make us smile with thanks.
We supply the wishing well,
No wrapping, an envelop who can tell.
Now that we have saved you all the fuss,
It would be appreciated if you would come
And celebrate with us

More than just kisses so far we’ve shared,
Our home has been made with love and care,
Most things we need we’ve already got,
And in out home we can’t fit a lot!
A wishing well we thought would be great,
(But only if you wish to participate),
A gift of money is placed in the well,
Then make a wish but shhh don’t tell!
Once we’ve replaced the old with the new,
We can look back and say it was thanks to you!
And in return for your kindness, we’re sure,
That one day soon you will get what you wished for.
Please don’t be offended at this type of request,
As our day is complete having you as our guest

All Taken from a erm lovely thread on another forum!!

Oh god, Zippy. That's made me feel quite ill.

Thats only half of what was on the other forum folowed by loads of threads with brides picking out which ones they were having! ?

? So true